SC's Still Human
by Sarcataclysmal
Summary: If I'm human, I'm human. If I'm a ghoul, I'm human. If I'm half and half, I'm still human... yet why do I feel so inhuman? Touka? Hide? Kaneki POV; half-chapters are sort of like extra things I felt like adding but aren't necessarily needed.
1. Pensive Peace

**Author's Note: THIS DOES NOT FOLLOW THE MANGA OR ANIME. Thanks.**

* * *

Why?... Why-WHY-WHY!? Why me... out of all the people in world why me? Why do I have to be part of some accident that transforms me into this- into this _bakemono._ Why me? Why couldn't it be someone who wanted to die- someone who didn't care... why me, my peaceful life is ruined... I don't want to be this _thing._ I just want to die- what if I eat Hide? What if I go around murdering innocent people? HOW COULD I LIVE WITH MYSELF? I can't do this...

Tears rolled down my face as I cried. I can't take this... this life as a thing that eats humans. A thing that is hunted down by the CCG... a thing hated by the population... why me? Why is my life such a _tragedy_? This isn't what I wanted...

About that time where I would almost lose control, I heard someone at the door. I didn't want to answer it- what if it was Hide? I'm so hungry... I can't bare it- if it's Hide I might just eat him after opening the front door.

"Hey idiot, open up!" The person said. Aggressive attitude? A woman's voice? "Idiot." Is it _her_?

I heard the door knock louder- if I don't hurry she might break the door down... damn it, Touka... why must you do this to me? "Open the door before I kick it down!" Seems I was right, she would kick down my door. Unfortunately, I don't need a broken door in my house, it might cause problems.

I went over to the door and slowly opened it to see Touka with... something. It smelled good- SO GOOD. But with that in mind, I knew what it was being a "half-ghoul" and all, where everything tastes bad to me now, with the exception of coffee and humans...

"I'm not eating that. Go away!" I yelled out to her as I quickly tried to shut the door, however, being Touka, she stopped it before I could close it all the way.

Touka immediately responded truculently holding the door as I ever so hard tried to push it closed, "Believe me, I would if I could, but the Manager told me to bring this to you! He said something about needing to understand that this is 'how life works' or something." She started to slowly push the door open with her one hand, god I was weak.

"I don't care! I don't want to eat another person! Not after you forced me to last time... just leave me here to die." I replied. I was inconsolable at this point- who could help me? I don't know any ghoul therapists, WHO WOULD BE WILLING TO HELP A GHOUL ACHIEVE HAPPINESS IN THE WORLD? The CCG won't, they'll lock me up and torture me for all I know.

"It doesn't look like I have a choice, _Kaneki_." She forced the door open finally, and I was thrown a few inches back onto my rear. I looked up to see Touka looking at me. Her purple hair covering her right eye. She was wearing Anteiku's uniform... the "package" being carried in her right arm. She looked mad at me- probably because I wasted her time holding up that door but, how can I know? If I'd never met- no, _seen_ Rize, I might have gone for Touka. Her body seemed so delicate yet she was a person who relied on brute force...

I looked down. I was sorrowful. You'd look at me and see a pitiful 18 year old college student. Touka probably saw that in me. What Yoshimura, the Manager, thought was inconceivable to me, but he probably made something up about finding my point in the world. I don't care, honestly.

"You have to eat this, Kaneki." The woman in front of me dropped the package near my legs. "If you don't, I don't care- I was just _ordered_ to bring this to you. You can sit here and rot if you want."

I wanted what was in the package. Was it liver? Heart? Intestine? Throat? Leg? Arm? I didn't care, I wanted to eat it but even so, I had to hold myself back. Rize's consciousness was in me, or rather, I made a second personality within myself that wanted only to eat, what a mirror of what Rize would do.

The question was, _should_ I eat it. It's not if I want to or not, it's if I should. I was given a second chance at life since the accident with Rize, so maybe I shouldn't let it go to waste by sitting hear and dying. Mr. Yoshimura came to all this trouble to help me, so maybe I shouldn't let his effort and time be for nothing. And Hide- Hideyoshi, what would he do without me? He would be sad at losing a friend, someone he's known since childhood. Someone he's laughed and had fun with and gone through hard times with... I don't want him to feel lonely intentionally, or at all really, but... I don't want to be a _ghoul_. However I may not want to be something, I won't live for myself, I'll live for Hide. _"It's been to short, Hide. Maybe later on, when you have someone else to care about, I'll leave... but for now I'll stay."_ I thought.

I opened the package. It was a small container with a cloth wrapped around it. Slowly was the only way to open it. I had to control myself; if I didn't, what would happen later on when I'm hungry? Touka had disappeared by now, shutting the door and walking off to who knows where (probably Anteiku, but I don't know). I was shaking as I was opening the box, trying ever so desperately not to lose myself. When I had opened it, of course there was meat. _Ningen_.

Without hesitation I ate it. It tasted delicious, however, I still regret eating it- a person like me...

* * *

It's been said that a ghoul only needs to eat about once every one to two months, so I'll have to eat on average about nine humans a year...

I've been doing better recently. With the hunger gone, I've decided to go back to the university with Hide. It's been pretty peaceful lately, but I don't expect that to last forever. I've kept going to Anteiku- nothing out of the ordinary except for Rize gone. I regret not being able to run away from her so that this mess wouldn't of happened, so that she would still be alive too... funny, huh? I'm wishing for the person that almost killed and ate me to be alive again... this word is perplexing, no, _humans_ are perplexing. We can't fathom some things we do, yet we still do it. We might be ghouls, but on the inside we're basically people, right?

* * *

Several days after Touka's visit to deliver food, I decided to join Anteiku. Not for the food or for the money, but because it was a place of serenity. If I can live as much as I can in a place where I don't have to think about being ghoul, then I'll live by that. I don't want to be a ghoul or a human, I want to be me.

"Kaneki, this coffee tastes like _shit_." Someone sneered at me. Oh, that's right... I'm supposed to be practicing making coffee...

"Touka, calm down it's only my fifth time trying _today_." I passively answered to her rude tone. I wasn't big on talking back or aggressiveness, so I always tried to keep quiet and relaxed.

"It doesn't matter, it's still a pain when you're wasting what _could be_ good coffee." She looked at me this time as she talked, she didn't look angry just annoyed that she had to deal with me. That's a depressing thought.

"Ok, ok. give me some time I'll get the hang of it."

At about that time the door opened revealing the enigmatic and energetic "womanizer" Hide Nagachicka. "Youkoso." Touka looked up to Hide brightly and happily.

I don't know if it was that she didn't like me, she liked Hide, or she did that to all customers- why the hell does she treat me like trash? Maybe I just have to get on her good side? I'll figure it out eventually.

"Hey , Kaneki." He waved at me as he walked over and sat down.

"Oh hi, Hide." I looked at him smiling.

"So you got a job here huh? Did'ya get it to get close to _her_ by any chance?" Hide smirked as he lightly gestured to the girl next to me. Touka, in response, walked into the back with an irritated face.

"W-what? No, no, that's not it at all!" I replied trying to make myself heard so Touka would come back and finish helping me.

"Relax _eyepatch_ , I'm only teasing." The blond responded.

I sighed and looked at Hide, "Hide, you're mean."

"You just can't take a joke Kaneki." He replied. "By the way, is that permanent?"

"Ano..." Hide... I can't tell you the truth can I? But I can't make up some lie either... "I don't know, the doctor didn't say anything about it." Well, it was the truth, no doubt about that, but whether he would buy it or not was another story.

"What a bad doctor." Hide responded making hand gestures here and there... but he was right, he hadn't explained much to me at all.

"Oh crap!" He suddenly yelled rushing and getting his stuff. "I only meant to say hi... I have to go Kaneki, sorry for staying so short!" He said as he rushed out, stumbling to get organized and balanced. Hide...

"Now that he's gone, let's get back to work, _Kaneki_." I could hear Touka sneer my name. What about me pisses her off so much? I can only wonder.

"Hai."

* * *

By the end of the day, I had gotten a little better at making coffee. Touka might've thrown up the little sips she took from each small cup because of what she said "tasted like shit". It did insult me a little, but she complimented me once and let me off the hook "for now". Just thinking about that gave me shivers... I could feel the sadism that might be lurking within her.

I was walking home- the dark night filled with street lights and other lights made from humans. I looked around seeing everything that was around me... it wasn't something I'd normally do... usually I'd just lose myself as I subconsciously walked home, but for some reason I was looking this time. Why? I don't know. I just walked admiring what I missed all these years. Did becoming a ghoul open me up to the real world? Was a tragedy all I really ever needed? I stopped suddenly. I took a look around me in the middle of a sidewalk. It might've been night, but the streets were still busy as the city kept moving.

I could smell people individually. The scent baring a sweet and delicious smell. The people all walked not giving a care in the world that ghouls might be in the crowd among them. I was envious because I could never wholeheartedly be careless, except for when I met Rize. The crowds kept moving. The _cycle of life_ kept moving. People would have myriads of things they would want to do, but I could only care about myself and Hide. I blame myself for being self-centered, and that's all I could think about. Was a shameless, tragic young boy Ken Kaneki _was_.

* * *

"Irimi-san!" I inside-voice-yelled to a girl, "A regular tea please!"

"On it!" She replied.

About a minute later, Irimi then called out to me again, "Kaneki, could you please serve this lady here for me? Touka's busy, Koma's running late and I have to go to the back to get a few things."

"H-hai" I quickly responded. Telling me to make someone coffee was a mistake on its own. I swear Touka gave me a look of "I'll kill you if you screw this up" to me. I nervously walked over to the position of which I had been practicing for a long time now. I kept telling myself not to screw up, but that only seemed to make me even more anxious. My hands were shaking because of how tense I was, but they stopped when I thought about Oka-san... my mother. She was such a happy woman. Well, not necessarily happy but she was caring. "It's better to get hurt, than hurt others" was a sort of thing she said. She cared too much for others, which ended up being her death but even until the end, I loved her. It was so calming thinking about her...

I made the coffee fine, thinking I did outstanding work, but the customer would have to decide that on her own. I walked over, attentively not to trip with my inept legs as I awkwardly got to the woman. She had a small child with her, her daughter I'd suppose. I gave it to her with a smile and started walking back.

No further than two feet had I gotten when she called for me back. The imagination could only give me a small percentage of the insults I could get for making such horrendous coffee...

Instead I received a question, "Sir, are you new here?" She quietly said. Nothing about the coffee? No, it wasn't that... she took a sip of it and looks content with it... does that mean I made good coffee?

"Y-yes ma'am." My awkwardness slipped out of my mouth.

"I see..." She said. "Nice to meet you, I am Ryouka Fueguchi, this is my daughter Hinami." Her words felt kind, like my mother.

"Hi. I'm Ken Kaneki." I looked to Hinami. She didn't look at me, she looked away into nothing before getting up and running into the back.

"Don't mind her... we're just having... family, problems." She was able to get out without a change in her voice.

Judging my Hinami going into the back of Anteiku, I guessed that these two were friends of Touka or the Manager. And being friends of them, I guessed they were ghouls. A ghoul reminded me of my mother huh... wherever God is, if he exists, must be playing tricks on me. But even so, it just looked like another side of life. The CCG and most humans want to eliminate ghouls, and the ghouls want to eat humans to survive. Like zebras and lions- they both are trying to protect their family and live at the same time. They mate, they birth, they play, survive... what a cruel world.

"Do you know the Manager, by any chance?" I asked staring into her orbs. Those eyes could fill the oceans many times with the tears that they could create.

"Yes, he's a friend of mine. But, pardon my asking, are you a ghoul?" She quietly said, making sure no one else heard our conversation.

"N-not particularly. I mean, I'm like, a half-hybrid thing..." I stuttered making nonsense, "Rize's organs were put into me, and now I'm... whatever I am now..." My mouth managed to word as I remembered that girl and my innocence as a human being...

"Ah, I see.. so young and you've already gone through your fair of troubles." She looked up, trying to cover her pity (what I believed to be pity, at least) up with a smile of grace. "Don't lose your hope, Kaneki Ken, just keep living."

She got up and walked over to Touka. The two started to converse before Ms. Fueguchi disappeared into the back. Young huh? Fair of troubles...

 _"BUT IT'S NOT FAIR."_ I almost yelled out. No one else seemed to be here right now. It was just us at Anteiku and the Fueguchis, who were in the back. I slowly sat down in pain. What was I getting so mad over? Shit... I'm going insane... I'm going to lose my mind... I'll die if this keeps up.

"Kaneki." I snapped back into reality. Slowly lifting my head I looked at who was calling me.

"Touka..." I unconsciously said. I think she saw my eyes, or something that looked sorrowful within me. She came over to me, as if it were instinctive.

"Kaneki? What's wrong?" She asked as she sat in the chair opposite of me. Touka... my eyes started to tear a bit, thinking about the recent events. Why are you only now being nice? Even when I was near going insane you didn't help me... why now?

Nothing came out of my mouth. I just sat their slightly teary eyed trying to think of an excuse, but not a thing could come out of my mouth. Instead I wiped my eyes and smiled to Touka, getting up and heading back to the counter to clean.

"Kaneki?" She asked once more. Her left eye watching me closely.

"Nothing." I finally responded before picking up a towel, and getting back to work.

* * *

The end of the week finally came- the first week I've gotten through at Anteiku. It might've been the next morning from the day after my actual first week since starting to work here, but it still didn't change the fact that my hopes were up about being able to peacefully live here.

The first thing I saw from when I got to the shop was Hinami and Kyouko at the shop talking with the Manager. I started to set up for the day ahead as the two girls walked out of the shop and what I presumed was shopping, however, Hinami's face was the same as the first time I met her- dark and without motion. Judging by "family issues" and the fact that only her mother was here, I presumed the father must of been killed by the CCG or another ghoul as he defended "his" territory like the others, and the two came here to reconcile with each other and live the most graceful life they could for a bit.

They both exited the shop as the Manager walked over to me.

"Kaneki." He quietly said. His face in the direction of the Fueguchi family as they headed off. "Do you know what it is to have a serious, caring relationship?" The white haired man asked.

"Um... I don't think so... I've never been in one, and I don't presume that movies and TV shows would count, would they?" I responded with another question.

"I see. Two humans who love each other can make a child, am I not correct?"

"Uh, y-you are correct, Yoshimura-san." I looked over to his stern, unmoving face.

"And what happens if two ghouls love each other?" He asked a second question.

"Then... a ghoul child is birthed, correct? Or, not in that manner, but in an undescriptive way, yes."

He made a small smile, "Yes. Hinami is the child of two ghouls, however, her father was recently killed by another ghoul. We have no idea as to why someone would target a peaceful one like him... he was a doctor who ran a small clinic. A very sad thing indeed, so I hope you can provide as much comfort for our guests for a few days, Kaneki."

"Yes sir!" I instinctively said.

* * *

It was later while Koma, Touka and I were closing shop that a man came by and... he was with Hide.

"Hey Kaneki! Meet my upperclassmen, Nishio Nishiki." Hide said as he strolled into the café and caught be in a one-arm hug.

"Tch. I'm outta here." Touka abruptly said and swiftly walked out of the room.

"Huh... wonder what all that was about."

"That girl Touka and I have a bit of... " I saw him sniff the air. Even if it was momentarily, he did pause long enough for me to notice. What was he doing? "...a feud."

Hide looked at him with disappointment, "You have a feud with a cute girl like that? No wonder you'll be lonely forever Nishiki! Well, I mean, maybe your gf will dump you!"

Nishiki, in response, flicked his head, "Damare. She wouldn't do that."

"Yeah, yeah," I saw Hide brush off the contact of skin, "Hey Kaneki, you're done with work right? How about you come with us? We're going to his house to get a few things then over to mine to get a few more things."

"Uh, sure, why not? Koma, can you handle the rest?" I looked over to the waiter.

"Sure, I'll just leave it to Touka." He said as he chuckled. I chuckled as well.

"Thank you, Koma." I said as I went over to change out of my Anteiku clothes.

As soon as I was done, we headed out for Nishiki's house.

 **UPDATE DATE: January 7, 2017. I decided to look at my work and fix errors. I will be doing this with future chapters and old ones.**


	2. Asaki Fueguchi

**These "half" or "backstory" chapters are shorter than normal ones, and will be in the Third Person View/POV. These are made in order to show sequences of "backstory", or so, that are made for this story. **

**Basically, this isn't the manga or anime so don't bitch about it.**

* * *

"So, I need another tool. Make it." A white/blond haired man said. The frightening voice of his scared the two he had hostage and angered the one he didn't.

"F-fine! But if you do anything to them... I'm done Yamori!" A man in a white coat said. His voice trembling- his body quivering. He got to work- on the _tool_ he was supposed to make.

"You're done?" The man proclaimed to be Yamori frowned. "If you're done, then what's the point of having you... or them?" His hand reached to the older of two girls by his side. They both held on to each other- a mother and daughter. She trembled and struggled as his hand groped her neck pulling her upwards. She was choking.

"No! No, that's not what I mean Yamori! Please... just leave them alone and I'll make you an extra!" He yelled panicking. Asaki Fueguchi worked relentlessly to make a pair of the tools his abuser had told him to make in exchange for his family's well-being. They were all ghouls, however, Yamori could easily overpower all of them.

After about an hour of grueling work and a tense atmosphere, the tools were complete.

"Yamori... they're done, now let them go!" He tossed both items over to the oppression.

Yamori caught them in one hand- one giant, strong hand. "Thank you doctor. You can have these two things back." He kicked Ryouko Fueguchi, the wife of Asaki, lightly and headed out the door.

"Ryouko! Hinami!" The doctor cried out as he hugged his wife and daughter. Both were in a mentally broken state after all the trauma just brought to them. "Ryouko... Ryouko..." he pleaded to god- whichever god that would help him. "Take Hinami... go the 20th Ward, Anteiku. I'll meet up with you there later, I just have some things to take care of, okay?"

His wife looked at him wide eyed. She wanted him to go with her and her daughter. "No... no, come with us, please!"

"I'm sorry." He said looking at her sternly. "But you are my priority right now. There's no need for you to get involved anymore... I'm going to close up shop, pay everyone I owe, get the money others owe me and head towards Anteiku with you."

The man looked over to the door. "Now get your things and leave, I won't leave this life without you by my side, so don't worry about me."

The woman nodded. She was too frightened to speak, and too worried to let go of her daughter. The prevalent news of ghouls in the 11th Ward was stirring up trouble, so the idea of going to the 20th Ward, a peaceful ward, was a good idea.

"Alright, go then." He said.

Mrs. Fueguchi did as her husband pleaded and went off to gather her belongings and leave. As she did so, she gave her husband a good bye- no, rather a 'see you soon' kiss. As she left, she saw her husband's worried, yet happy face; worried for his safety, happy for his family's.


	3. Human Love

The walk to Nishiki's house was slow and awkward. It felt like there was something else going on- something malicious and malevolent. The walk lingered on and on, never ceasing. The existing awkwardness between us was inconvenient and unbearable. It could drive someone insane had they not kept themselves in tact.

Every so often, I'd see Nishiki look over to Hide, and then over to me. It was a small glance- barely noticeable, but it still happened. He pestered on with that every so often. It got me worked up and all, waiting for him to do something. Something that would penetrate my skin deep enough to cause my insanity to spring out from within me. _Something_ that would end whatever this silence was. It was anticipation, suspense, _anxiety_.

We walked on and on- a seemingly never ending path that would lead to no where. However, we soon reached his apartment- Nishio Nishiki's abode.

"Well here we are..." Nishiki said, sounding as if he hated where he lived. "Let's go inside."

I stood there for a moment, watching Nishiki. Watching for any slight, odd movements. They never came.

"C'mon Ka-ne-ki! Let's go inside and look for some dirty magazines~" Hide implied we do. However much it was a joke, he still got hit for saying such a thing in Nishiki's presence.

"Hey! It's all just a joke Nishiki, no need to get so mad." Hide pouted rubbing his head. Maybe it was just his nature, maybe Nishiki didn't hit him that hard- whatever it was, Hide seemed to have forgotten all about the hit he just took.

"That's why I got mad idiot, because it was a joke." The other scowled, taking us up the stairs to his apartment. The apartments around here were standard- small, nice and looked the same as the rest in the same parameter.

He got the key out and started to unlock the door, however, the door _was already unlocked_. I don't know what went through his mind then, but it was frustrating to even watch. His mouth crunched together, his eyes opened wide, his aura gave off a terrifying glow.

His hands almost shoved the door down with force, and without the door handle already mostly turned, it's possible the door _would have_ been broken down. Inside the house was trashed. Broken things; stains everywhere; blood... blood... I had assumed he was a ghoul, with temper issues and what not, but seeing how angry he was, something precious must have been taken away. His prey, or more likely, a person whom he loved. Whom he'd die for- like Hide for me.

"Kimi!" He started to yell over and over. Kimi- a woman's name. A sister or love, most likely the latter. He frantically searched the house for 'Kimi', albeit coming up short handed. "Kimi..." Nishiki fell down to his knees, starting to weep. "Why? Who- who would take a beautiful girl like you? Wh- who would want to- to do somethin like that?"

Hide stared in silence, before speaking up with shocking words. "So the CCG came here huh. Then let's get your girlfriend back, Nishiki." Hide smiled, the ever so optimistic one.

"What do you mean the CCG? They investigate gho-"

"I know you're one of them, Nishiki. I notice you looking at me with a hunger in your eye, and you and Kaneki kept staring at each other... it was either that or you're both falling for each other." Formally announcing of his knowing of the truth.

I couldn't believe it- any of it. This aggressive man's having a girlfriend, Hide knowing, Hide's opportunistic ideas even though of the circumstances right now...

"Hide... when did y-"

"Back at the hospital. They let me see you; you opened your eyes once, subconsciously when I tried speaking to you, and there sat the eye- I sorta wondered if it was to look cool to get the ladies all over ya'." The orange/blond joked halfheartedly. It was a bit scary, finding out someone you care about knew the secret you tried to keep away from them... but it was relieving, he accepted me for who I wa- no, for who I am.

"Why didn't you tell me, Hide?" I almost wept as I said those words, but who wouldn't?

"I thought it'd be better to act like I didn't know..." His eyes wandered down, possibly pondering why he didn't say it sooner. But, it was something I could understand, in a sense. "But, Nishiki-senpai, that blood stain on the ground is old; when was your last paying of rent?"

"What doe-"

"Just answer it, senpai." Hide retorted to his unmannerly weeping/talking.

"A week ago or so..." His voice trembled with every word, trying to figure out what the rent had to do with anything.

Hide looked at him as I figured it out. "The landlord must have seen Kimi sitting down behind you and some blood stains when she had you suck some of her blood. Then he called the CCG."

Nishiki, although looking surprised at how Hide knew about Kimi being like a blood drive for him (I didn't catch that), returned to a furious state. "That fucking landlord... I'LL KILL HIM!"

"No, don't Nishiki. It wasn't his fault- he was just doing... what a human would've done." I interrupted his outrage, but the human-ness of what I had said seemed to calm him down a bit.

"So what do we do?" The tall blond questioned the other blond, slowly rising from his spot of weep- his confidence restored.

"You don't have to do anything, Nishio-senpai. You're a ghoul, they'll see right through you- I can act like she's my girlfriend, yeah? After all, I'm great with ladies." Hide strategized his plan. Although I knew he was joking on that last part, it'd probably end up being the actual plan.

"Hey, hey! She's m-"

"Um, do you want Kimi back or not, Nishiki-san?" I slowly asked him, giving him time to intellectually process every sound resonating from my larynx. It took me some courage to say such a thing to his face and sound so cocky.

In a sigh of defeat and agony, he gave into us. "Yeah... yeah... but you have to promise me, you won't do any of your usual crap, Hide... and more importantly: You _will_ get her back." Nishiki demanded we do.

"Yesir." Hide and I accepted his unneeded conditions, as we were already aware of such things.

* * *

The next day was when we proceeded our plan. I didn't have to work (on the occasion that I was helping a ghoul in need, as stated by the Manager), Hide didn't have school, and Nishiki I believe just skipped work entirely. How self-centered is he?

"Ok. Kaneki, you'll come with me and act like a friend trying to help his buddy (me), and Nishiki stay out here and watch for any harmful looking people." Hide simply said. It wasn't an overall great plan, but then again, we were two college students and a guy who could be a closet NEET, what might you expect of us?

"Tch. Of course you'd make me something like the outside watch; that's fuckin' pathetic." The older of us mumbled under his breath, but I heard it and decided it wasn't worth mentioning.

"Ok. Kaneki, let's go!" The great and all mighty plan creator hailed.

As we approached the CCG office, I got a cold feeling. It wasn't some cliché 'I've got a bad feeling about this', it was more so a tragic or sorrowful sort of aura that the building seem to give off. Assuming this was an office building and such, I could imagine that some families were here to report of someone missing, dead, or a ghoul spotted. And those here for dead people were the ones giving the building such a dejected glow.

A sliding door opened as we approached the front. Inside we went, and all around us were CCG guards. I looked around a bit, subtly so not to attract attention, and found RC Cell detectors. They hadn't gone off when I came in... so, maybe I was still, physically, human. Maybe being a half I could only produced so many- yeah, that was the reason.

We walked over to a woman sitting at a desk.

Hide smiled at her, probably trying to charm her a bit, and started to talk, "Hello, we're here to pick someone up from your custody." He tranquilly told the office employee.

"Have you made an appointment?" She asked him as she smiled back to him.

Hide made a surprised and distraught face, "We're supposed to make those here?!"

The woman, probably in her mid 20s, chuckled.

So you can even charm ladies older than you, Hideyoshi?

"Yes, you are supposed to make them." She said. As soon as she said so, however, she placed her face a little bit lower to the desk. "But since you seem like nice people, I'll add you guys to the supposed schedule. Don't get me fired, yeah?" She said.

"Ok. Thank you!" Hide's smile turned more joyous.

"So, who are you here to pick up?" She then asked. I didn't know Kimi's last name. Hide, I hope you know her last name or we'll be in the gutter pretty fast.

"Kimi Nishino." Hide slowly responded, making sure he didn't slur her name.

"Ah. Ok, I'll alert the Investigator in charge of her. Please wait for a few minutes at most." The lady said. Hide and I then walked over to a side of the building where a wall was. There we just waited.

Looking over to Hide, I was about to speak, before being silenced by the blond.

"Kaneki. It's ok. We don't have to talk about it."

Unfortunately for me, he was right. There was no need to continue the pointless conversation from yesterday, but I wanted to. The only reason I didn't is because it might've made Hide feel uncomfortable... to come out with a secret like knowing your deepest secret.

Quickly the time passed, and after about 6 minutes of just standing, someone called to us. "This way please, if you don't mind. We just have a few things to ask of you." A man said. White hair, a pair of dead fish looking eyes- who was he? An investigator? Or maybe just someone who worked here? No- no, he seemed like much more than an employee; he was definitely an investigator. _Shit_.

"C'mon, Kaneki. A few questions won't hurt." Hide said, in a normal speaking voice just loud enough so the investigator-looking-man could here. Hide was naturally obnoxious, so I hope this guy can't confirm of a _true_ reason of our doing this.

He took us to a small interrogation room together (smart move). Inside was fairly comfortable, and the two of us sat on one side as he sat on another. _As long as they don't bring out a polygraph_ I kept telling myself, trying to keep the worry and distress off of my face.

"Hello there. Let me introduce myself. I am CCG First-Class Ghoul Investigator Kureo Madou." The man said as he identified himself.

"Hello! I am Hideyoshi Nagachika." Said person, well, said. His obnoxiousness probably gave Investigator Madou a bit of whiplash.

"And I'm- uh, K-Kaneki Ken." I blatantly said. It sounded so suspicious to me, and I was hoping that the Investigator didn't think the same.

"So then, boys, I've been told you're here to get miss Kimi Nishino out of here, yes?" The investigator questioned us- he seemed scary. A death-defying glare; an eye that looked like it cold be lazy; a stalker's smile. And his personality... it seemed to match.

"Y-yesir!" I awkwardly erupted from my mouth.

"Ok then. I do assume you know as to why she is here in this facility, correct?" Madou asked us (although it seemed rhetorical; he probably already knew our answer).

"Yes. She is under the suspicion of being a gho-"

"-or, one, or both, of you are ghouls, using her as a feeding source by blackmail." Madou interrupted Hide.

Hide seemed fine at the investigator's -almost correct- conjecture.

I, on the other hand, just sat there, once again dozing off like I usually did.

"Now why would I do that _to my girlfriend?"_ Hide asked, sticking to his plan of faking the boyfriend part. He was probably happy inside though, to finally be able to call someone that with pride, fake or not.

"Why would I do that? I have my own girl, Kimi, whom I so passionately love, so why should I need another culture's women? It's horrendous to say such things!" Hide retorted to Madou's sarcastic question.

The white haired man, in turn, decided to give up. I don't think it's the fact that he gave up, moreover he saw no point in trying to push my friend further. Instead, he looked over to me. I gulped, knowing that he was going to question me next. 'Might you be blackmailing him _and_ the girl?' might be what has asks me. Ugh, I don't know how I'm supposed to respond.

"And, Mr. Kaneki, where do you go to school?" Madou asked me. I was confused at what this had to do with his interrogation, but nonetheless answered without doubt.

"Kimii University."

"Ah. Have there any been, any girls you've liked?" Madou questioned me once more.

"There was one... but, it didn't turn out so well..." I said, slowly deepening in my tone, looking to the ground with a sadness in my eye.

Satisfied with our answer, although I have no idea why, he took out a shee of paperwork and gave it to Hide. I seemed to just be a bystander here. It's possible I had nothing to do with the interrogation, Madou was probably just doing his job- even if I hadn't triggered any RC detectors.

Hide quickly finished the paperwork and gave it to Madou, who looked it over, keeping that odd grin on his face. At the end, his grin slowly faded away.

"Alright." Madou walked over to the door. He opened it and told a guard to take us to the lobby as he went to get Kimi. The guard took us over to the designated spot, and a few minutes later came Kimi. She might have been expecting Kimi, but as soon as she got to us she hugged Hide abruptly.

"Thanks for coming quick, Hide." She said, removing the honorific from his name **[1].**

"I wouldn't be a good man if I didn't, would I?" He responded, hugging her back.

Madou seemed slightly annoyed- he didn't find anything ghoul-ish with us. "Ok, you can go. Shoo." He said, turning his back walking to the back of the building.

We walked out with Hide and Kimi close together, and did the same until we reached about a block away where Nishiki had been waiting after (poorly) following us.

"NISHIKI!" She half-yelled lunging at him and tying him up in her arms.

"Woah, hey there, Kimi." Nishiki replied. "Thanks... for your help, Hide, Kaneki." Nishiki looked as if he had his pride stripped from him.

"Yeah, no problem, Nishiki. And thanks for that hug, Kimi-san. I really needed it." The smaller blond laughed.

An annoyed Nishiki then chopped his head. "Hey, stop it. She's mine, that was just a pretend hug, right Kimi?" He glared over to his girlfriend, awaiting for her prophesized response.

She smiled, "Mhm."

In a way, that was the end of that. A tragedy, rerouted to a happy comedy.

Hide and I said bye to Kimi and Nishiki as they walked back to their apartment and we walked. Oh. Their place is trashed... that's right... oh well, that's a Nishiki problem now.

"Oi, Kaneki. Why don't you get a girl as loyal and smart thinking like her?" Hide asked me, reverting to his perverted/queer **[2** **]** ways.

I internally frowned, reminding myself of Rize, but decided to play along anyways. "Really? And who would want to go somewhere with me? After all, my dream date is a library." I said, mocking our conversation from a few days ago.

"How about... Irimi or Roma?" He named to of my co-workers.

"No, no. They're older than me... I think, and I see them like my family." I said as we turned a corner. We were walking to Anteiku... I think; I wasn't really paying attention to where I was going as I thought about Anteiku- the happy smiles on (almost) everyone as we worked.

Hide then started a giggling fit, and I could see his eyes almost all the way closed and a grin on his face as I looked at him. "And what about _Touka-chan?_ " Hide emphasized what I called her. **[** **3** **]**

I blushed a little. It was true that I thought she was cute when I first met her at Anteiku, but after learning her true self I tried to distance myself a bit from her. Over the past few dats however, I'd catch her doing somethin in-Touka like- having a cute, girlish attitude. Mostly towards bunnies and when she was with her friend (whom I learned was named Yoriko). "E-eh? W-what are you talking about Hide? I don't like her? And b-besides, she's mean to me."

"You're stuttering~! And don't they say that hate is just a form of love that love can't quite reach? Eh? EH?" The blond pestered on. He did change the words to the saying, but nonetheless it had the same context.

"No, no. It's n-nothing at all- we're just colleagues, really, believe me!" I retaliated.

"Is that so, Ka- ne- ki~."

* * *

1: Even if this is an English fanfiction, keep in mind I'm trying to stick with Japanese culture, if only a little.

2: For those of you that spend your time on the internet all day and see "queer" as an insult or a description of homosexuals, it actually means "strange; odd". I know people that mistake these things, that's why I pointed this out.

3: For those of you that watch the dub, don't know or don't care: the honorific "chan" means cute.

 **A/N: Sorry this chapter was 4 days late. I was supposed to finish this chapter on Friday, but I had some stuff to do and just got done with it. :P**


	4. The Rain

**Yo.**

 **Don't get mad at me for adding Hide and that character. I just feel the need to do so.**

 **IMPORTANT: I'd like you guys to tell me: Do you like this writing style or the writing style from chapter 1 better? Please reply in a review.**

* * *

Thursday. Hello, new day. What will you bring to me today? Sadness? Despair? Longing? Happiness? I don't know- so I can only wait until something happens today. This is what went on in my mind everyday after I woke up. They say sane people are those who expect something different- I still expect something different, yet I long for the same. Am I sane?

Shower; clothes; eat; teeth; a bit of other stuff; leave- the daily, morning schedule. It hadn't been interfered with so far, good.

I was walking into the street, heading for Anteiku, when I noticed a difference. A very peculiar worker of Anteiku just standing there, watching me. Her hair covering her right eye; should she not have been a violent person in character, I'd have asked her out many a time ago.

"Ken. Why'd you help that shitty Nishiki?" Touka Kirishima straightforwardly and aggressively asked me. I understood right away: _stalker._ Or possibly just Hide... no wait, she'd kill him... don't tell me she killed him! Maybe Nishiki? Kimi?

"U-uh... w-what do you mean?" I was jittery. I knew full well Touka and Nishiki were practically the God and Satan, but that means I'm just an average human on judgement day. Either side I choose I get decimated.

"Earlier today that bastard asked to join Anteiku because a ghoul named _Ken Kaneki_ had changed his mind about people. And obviously I couldn't kill him there because that girl... what the hell is with her anyways..." She wondered off, yet still managing to keep her glare on my right eye.

I backed up a bit on edge, yet still tried to keep myself coordinated (note, tried). "T-the Manager said if a ghoul is e-ever in need, we should, uh, help them... and Nishiki, is well, a jerk and all but, there was a human live that was in this so I-" She banged her arm on the wall and caught me from all sides, oh the horror. One arm on the left, one arm on the right, a devilish face in front of me- who wouldn't burst into tears or lose their mind when such an event unfolded? Probably everyone but me, but in any case, I once again _tried_ to do keep cool and not lose myself.

"If you're always nice like that, it'll get you killed, Ken." Was all she said before returning to a calm, satisfied state of mind. "Now change into casual clothes like I am. We have something else to do."

"Something else? What would-"

"Shut the hell up and go get changed!" She yelled before I could even finish, so much get halfway through, my sentence.

So much for my normal schedule. Damn Touka... where's Hide when you need him to scare her off?

* * *

I had gotten changed into casual clothes and went outside to see Touka still waiting, slumped over on the wall like a homeless person might've.

"You know, you could have just come in, Touka-chan." I stated.

She didn't reply with words, but rather made a noise that would best be portrayed as a wolverine's anger. How unattractive and mean, Touka-chan.

"So... what are we doing today?" I asked her as we walked along. We weren't going to Anteiku, that's the most I could tell.

"Shopping." I swear that I grew a bit uncomfortable with that in mind. Shopping? A date? No... for Anteiku? A possibility. For someone else? Most likely. With someone else? Another possibility. Touka, why must you be vague?

"For what?" My mouth once again asked.

Touka looked over to me. Her eye looking into mine for a split second, probably to see if I was paying attention and not dozing off like usual. "We're supposed to shop with the Fueguchis." She then responded.

The Fuegushis... who? Oh wait, Ryouko and Hinami, if I'm not mistaken. "Ryouk- Ms. Fueguchi and Hinami-chan?" I corrected my impoliteness of saying her first name rather than her last with the "Ms".

"Hai."

Ah. I see. So my assumption there was indeed correct.

* * *

We reached the shopping center (or, the area of shopping, more accurately) to see both Hinami and her mother waiting patiently for us.

"Hello Hinami, Ms. Fueguchi!" I waved gleefully to them.

Hinami hid behind her mother almost immediately after my greeting, but that was okay. After learning of what happened to them I couldn't really expect too much. Damn it Touka, why'd I have to know about that story... about "Asaki" Fueguchi, and this "Jason" person?

"Hello Kaneki, Touka." The older woman replied to us. "Well, let's get going. I think we should have some coffee first, get us moving a bit faster, how does that sound to yoy two?" She then questioned the two of us.

Coffee? There's no problem with that. "Alright, let's go get some coffee, Hinami!" I ecstatically told said girl. She kept herself hidden behind her mother but peeked a bit of her head out to look at me. That's a good reaction I suppose.

* * *

After having some coffee (not at Anteiku), we went shopping for clothes and accessories and such things. Ryouko, Hinami and Touka would go and have fun changing dresses and having fun as I depressingly sat outside the store just waiting for them. There was no way I was going to watch them, wait for them inside or want to seem like a pervert. Not in that store... that woman's clothes store.

"Kaneki. Let's go shop for you now." Touka commanded we do. She had a nicer tone to me right now, and that was due to Hinami being there. We wanted to give her the happiest moments we could. Even so, the snake that was in her voice never left. It slithered onto my leg before threatening to bite, of which I humbly complied with its requests.

* * *

"Hmmm. So you're about my size so... how does this look?" Touka pulled out a shirt. It was kind of her to shop for me, with Ms. Fueguchi and Hinami of course, but comparing my size to hers as equals... that's a bit harsh, even if it is true.

"Ano... it looks fine, Touka." I lightly brushed off her question.

"You could at least be honest." She said. "Why do I have to put up with this damn idiot." I could hear her mumble under her breat. Ah, there's the real Touka-chan. The real wolf under sheep's clothing.

Ms. Fueguchi started to lightly laugh, however I knew not as to why, and Touka seemed to give her the same questioned look.

"My, my what a couple you two look like. A woman looking for clothes for her husband and the two then arguing... it brings back memories." The brown haired woman claimed.

I wasn't sure whether to be flustered or slightly distraught, as she put Touka and I in the relationship category but then thought about her dead husband Asaki. No, no! I hit myself. We can't be thinking about the bad things... none of that. Why am I always thinking of tragedies- the sad part of life... why not think about the good things all the time, EVERY time. Without the bad things. Without the despair and death.

"G-glad it provided comic relief, Ms. Fueguchi." I smiled to her. I tried to avoid the arguing couple part, but it didn't seem to matter if I did or didn't. Either way it was okay.

Touka on the other, devilish hand, seemed a bit "pissed off" as she'd day. I don't get why, it was just a little bit of humor. And maybe some of Ms. Fueguchi's reminiscing, but even then, no harm was done.

"Shitty Kaneki." Touka once again mumbled as she returned to her mindless activity of looking for "good clothes" for me. "Here, how's this?" She then asked me.

I looked at it. I then felt it. It was a black dress shirt with a very nice fabric. Very well made and was my size (although I assumed Touka put it up to herself to see if it'd fit her before asking if I liked it). "I like this one... should we change the guy's uniform at Anteiku to this?" I wondered aloud.

"You'd have to ask the Manager." Touka replied, probably knowing that I was talking out loud but even so responded, probably to tease me.

"No need to be so mean, _rabbit_." I retorted to her teasing. Haha, how do you like that!?

"Ka. Ne. Ki. What. Did. You. Just. Say?" She slowly said every word making sure the big idea got into my head. How unusually frightening from the normal threatening mood in her voice...

"Nothing..." I quietly whimpered, backing my offense down forming a very weak defense. Rabbits must really mean that much to here huh... or maybe I invaded her personal space a little bit and now she's angry. Or was that a secret? No that fits in with the invasion of privacy... what goes on in that head of yours, Touka Kirishima?

"Touka?"

"Kaneki?"

Two voices, not belonging to either Ms. Fueguchi or Hinami, said both of our names. I looked over, as did the girl next to me, to where the sound of our names came from.

"Hide?" I questioned.

"Yoriko?" Touka, at the same time, also questioned.

Shit.

"Kaneki? I thought you said you didn't have your eyes on this one!" Hide obnoxiously said, probably alerting the entire store of what he just said. Well, maybe that's over exaggerating, but it's close enough. He put his arm around me, hugged me closer to him and whispered into my ear. "So... how's it goin'?"

"W-well, Hide, we're not r-rea-"

"Don't hide it anymore Kaneki~." He pestered on. Hide was so persistent it hurt. It was always something I brought up, but that's because it was like a skill to him. He was like the protagonist to a cliché book: He'll never give up, he'll keep fighting, he won't die.

"I-I'm not hiding anything, Hide, I swear!" I kept on saying.

Meanwhile, I looked over to Touka and her friend. She looked to be having a bit of a time too. Yoriko seemed like the gender swapped version of Hide. It was interesting to say the least; how did Touka talk with "real" friends?

"Touka~" The other girl identified as Yoriko said. She just seemed to be looking at Touka as if she were an idol- no, A GOD! Her eyes gleamed and her stare was ever so dazzling as she looked at her friend. The smile of the happiest person on Earth just standing in front of us worshipping the devil.

Yoriko kind of reminded me of Hide. I can see why Touka was such good friends with her, even though I've never held a conversation with her. Nor have I ever seen her. I have denounced myself of not being able to prove any points.

The real question right now, at least for Touka and I, was why they were together. Hide and Yoriko were probably thinking the same thing.

Stepping back from us and towards each other, the two conversed in secret. What was it that they were talking about? I could only predict that Touka and I would find whatever it was they were talking about as surreptitious.

"Touka." Yoriko said.

"Kaneki." My friend said.

"I'M SO PROUD OF YOU!" They said in unison, looking to their respective familiarity as if it'd been planned and practiced from the start- oh wait, this is Hide... maybe he did plan this...

"No, no Hide, we were just here shopping with Ms. Fueguchi and her daughter Hinami over he-" I looked over to where said people once were. Inspecting the entire scene I knew- she left because she wanted this misunderstanding to happen. Why Ms. Fueguchi, I TRUSTED YOU!

Hide, scrutinizing my word, just laughed. "There's no need to create fake people to get out of a situation your already in, Kaneki. We already know, and to tell the truth, we're on a date too."

. . .

Quite the awkward silence we have here. Oh wait, what did Hide say? Something about being on a date with Touka's friend. Oh. Yeah.

"WHAT?" Touka must have had her mind blow. "When did this start Yoriko?" She questioned.

"Aha... like, three days ago... when did you two start?" Yoriko questioned back.

"Like... um... NEVER." The purple/black haired girl replied.

"That's debatable. Kaneki seems pretty comfortable with you-"

"-and as do you with him." The two somehow finished each other's sentence. By god these two might just be the Obnoxious Jesus and Obnoxious Jesus's Wife (I forget her name; damn it Kaneki, and you call yourself a major in literature) because they seemed like the most compatible people in the world right now. If I were to argue with them it'd be double the failure.

"Yoriko... let's talk about this... I DON'T WANT TO DATE THIS IDIOT." Touka said proudly. It hurt me inside; you didn't have to be that harsh Touka chan, you could've just said 'never going to happen' instead of calling me an idiot.

"What are you, Touka, a tsundere?" The other girl retaliated. Ah, anime- tsun and dere. It seems to fit you well Touka

My co-worker would usually hit someone or curse them out if they insulted her or said something to her disliking, but she didn't seem to be able to muster enough courage to do that to her best friend. So even ghouls have feelings- even Touka has feelings...

The ghoul world. The human world. They're the same things, people just don't understand that.

"Anyways... Touka, I hate to leave it here but Hide and I have more things to do."

"We'll leave you two alone." Hide swiftly said as he and Yoriko went off to a karaoke place or a movie. They're both likely... wait, why am I thinking about this?

As they left I looked up. The clouds were there- when the hell did they get there? It started to rain. Lightly. It wasn't hard, but it was lightly.

"Touka, let's come back another day... we should go back for now." I said.

"Yeah..." She muttered.

I looked around for Ms. Fueguchi and Hinami but couldn't find either of the missing persons. Where could they have gone? Is it possible they left already to keep this misunderstanding from getting into an understanding? No, they weren't those kind of people were they? Surely this was just a little enjoyable game for Ms. Fueguchi, and she'd come out saying 'Oh there you are' or something... what the hell.

"Touka?" I asked the girl next to me. "Where are Ms. Fueguchi and Hinami?"

She worriedly looked around with me.

"Ms. Fueguchi! (Ryouko!) Hinami!" We called out. There was no answer- no trace of either of the two.

Unlike smart, logical people we looked around together instead of splitting up.

We ran in the rain, we ran in worry. We searched desperately for them, even as we got sick in this cold rain. We came to an ally where we heard voices. Voices... Hinami? No. Ms. Fueguchi's... yes, it was indeed a voice belonging to she!

As we turned that dreadful corner we saw both ghouls talking to another person- a man with white hair and the weirdest of looks on his face... Madou? No, this one seemed unstable, more unstable than the investigator.

"Hello there, Hi- na- mi. Ryouko." The man seemed to playfully say as he took long, slow steps towards them. Touka and I listened and peeked from behind a wall to see what was going on, watching as the man approached the girls.

"Yamori." The older of the women said. His name was Yamori, alright.

"I've brought your husband for this heartwarming reunion." The tall, brawn man said. As he said that, he threw something towards Ms. Fueguchi... a body. Wait... Yamori... husband, dead. Jason. This was Jason, the one who murdered Hinami's father; Ms. Fueguchi's husband.

Ms. Fueguchi started to cry. It was quiet, but it existed; that cry of hers resonating- vibrating, in my heart.

"Indeed he said we'd die together..." Ms. Fueguchi stated, paraphrasing what were apparently her husband's words. Her kagune burst from her back as she started her attack. "Hinami... run, go find Touka and Kaneki... I love you, my beautiful daughter." She said through the ocean that was erupting from her eyes.

Turning back to Jason, she unleashed her kagune's power against him. Surely any normal ghoul would be killed due to the sheer swiftness of her kagune, but Yamori dodged with ease.

"This got boring real fast, so I'm going to spice it up a bit, well, hopefully. While you sit there, would you mind counting back by seven from 1000 for me?" He asked before grabbing hold of Ms. Fueguchi's kagune and ripping it from her back. The pain... it was like I could feel it on me; the feeling of getting a limb torn off with brute force. It must have been extremely painful.

Hinami activated her kagune, a beautiful mix of her mother's and what I could only think was her father's. Out of fear and panic, she attacked Jason. He had not expected her to do so, but nonetheless avoided her attack. As he did so, Ms. Fueguchi flanked him and stabbed his leg with her kagune.

He seemed unmoved, unfazed, at the pain that seemed to be inflicted onto him.

"Man, that was good, but try finishing the job." Jason said stomping on Ms. Fueguchi's kagune, yet again inflicting pain to her.

I'm worthless. Even though friends of mine are dying right now, I don't have the courage to fight. I can't do _shit_. I'm just a weak-ass ghoul who can't eat a human, who can't fight, who just denounces himself a failure... damn it... why am I so weak? Why couldn't I be like Touka, who was about pounce on him? She swiftly brought out her kagune, which I had never seen before, and surprised him by knocking him back a few feet.

"Oh... another little girly... and she seems strong... I'll have fun ripping your limbs apart for sure." Jason said as he, without his kagune activated, somehow seemed to teleport with speed, grabbed Touka's head and threw it against the wall.

I heard her cry in pain. In angered me, and so I punched myself as hard as I could in the face. Be strong Kaneki! Be strong! Hide would do something like this for you right? THEN BE A MAN KANEKI!

I ran towards Yamori and tried punching him which was easily blocked with a counterpunch that sent me flying. I really am weak...

Jason laughed. What an insult. "Another weak one? This is too sad."

He picked Touka up again and slammed her on the ground. Misery. Melancholy. That's all I could feel for being a worthless person. It doesn't seem tangible for us to be able to beat him.

Ms. Fueguchi and Hinami attacked him without warning again, making him dodge their attacks. "Ken. Take Touka..." She paused momentarily to catch her breath. "And go somewhere safe..." She demanded I do.

"What about Hinami?" I asked her as I slowly got up in dismay. She was fighting him. She was punched as soon as I looked over to her. To do that to a child... what kind of a monster are you, Jason?

The brown haired woman on the ground only smiled, "She's made up her mind- she'd rather die with her family than live without them... I wish she hadn't said something like that, but I have to spoil her sometimes. Please. Go, take her. The rain should cover your scent up." She said.

Without hesitation, I picked up Touka and started to run to the street.

"Good luck, Ken." I heard Ms. Fueguchi say before being too far to hear her.

"No stop... we have to help them." Touka complained to me. I know we do. I know we should, but we can't. We're not strong enough for someone like him. A feeling of trepidation lingered over me, so the first priority was to get to safety. Our safety was more important than there's. I know it's selfish to say that, but what else can I do?! I was told to go to safety... and they wanted to stay and fight, rather than try and run. The truth is cold and selfless, it hurts more than it should.

I started to run home. There weren't many people around since it was raining hard, but those that we went passed looked shocked and in disbelief as they saw a young, bloodied man carrying a young, bloodied woman. It might give them the wrong idea, but there is no time to worry about something like that.

She cried; I cried.

I reached the house and opened the door, throwing my wet shoes off and taking off Touka's. I don't know if ghouls get sick or not but it didn't matter right now. I set Touka down but she clung onto me with her arms wrapped around my neck. I decided to hug her back and brought her closer to myself. And for a while, we just sat there in an embrace, bawling until our bodies could no more...


	5. A Mask That Can Cover My Humility

**Going back to the first chapter's writing style.**

* * *

"So... it seems that Miss Fueguchi and Miss Hinami have left this world." The white haired man in front of us said. In the room was me (Ken Kaneki), Touka Kirishima, Enji Koma, Irimi Kaya, Renji Yomo, and Nishiki Nishio. We were all assembled to assess the dangers that are now present in our ward- the 20th Ward. The danger wasn't from humans and anti-ghoul societies, rather an internal struggle between ghouls, and our oppressor was a man called Yamori, or as other people called him, Jason.

I looked over to Touka. She seemed infuriated- whether it be furious at me for taking her away, with herself for not being strong enough or that damn Jason; it didn't really matter at who.

"Shit!" She yelled in frustration, hitting the wall with her fist, slightly denting it.

I softly put my hand on her fist that was still on the wall, slowly squeezing. "C-calm down Touka... I'm sad too but, we can't let that get in our way." I stuttered that first part out of fear as I reassured her.

"But she's dead! I want to kill that damn bastard!" She once again shouted in a fury.

"I understand you, Touka, but if we hunt him or try to find him, one of three things will happen: Jason finds and kills us, we kill Jason or the Doves get involved." The manager said. He was always so calm and tactile. It was like he was a grand, wise wizard.

I only learned what the doves were earlier today- or, at least, learned more about them. I knew them as the CCG, Commission of Counter Ghouls, or more accurately, the [ghoul] investigators.

"Alright everyone, if you can, try to be with someone wherever you go. If someone is going somewhere you're going or will stop by at, go with them. If you have free time, please go with someone who is going out. We stand a better chance unified than we are in division. We will hold something for Hinami-chan and Ms. Fueguchi at a later date. That is all." Yoshimura said as he gave his instructions. They were a bit vague but I assume we all got the idea of his plan. "Oh, and one more thing: we'll be closed for today. If anyone asks, it's for maintenance." The white haired ghoul added.

"Hai." The rest of us said.

Nishiki approached me confidently afterwards. _"Shit."_ I thought. What's going to happen?

"So I'm here for one day and there's already people dying- that's some pretty fucked up stuff Kaneki." Nishiki gingerly said. He wasn't being aggressive or mean- here was the real Nishiki. The "safe" one you might say.

I glanced up to the tall blond. He looked a bit sad. Even though he'd never met these people he still seemed to care about them. Even though he was a ghoul who killed- who hated people like Touka, he still showed some sympathy, even if it wasn't all that visible.

This world really is _fucked_ up. Making creatures kill for nutrients. Making things with emotions suffer like this. Mother nature; father time- what point are you trying to prove? There is no survivability and natural selection in the ghoul and human world- we're just killing for fun it seems. There's no point to our fighting. What the hell's with this? Why? I felt like shedding tears... I feel like shedding tears. I want to call out for the goodness in human's hearts, but there's nothing to call out. We're like cattle working for machine men with machine hearts. They diet us. Treat us like cannon fodder. We have to stand up for ourselves, but we don't. We choose the cowardice act and kill or hide. **[1]**

Touka seemed to stomp out of the room as soon as I stopped thinking about that. Enjin and Irimi were talking with Yomo. Yoshimura only sat down and seemed to think. He looked over to me and smiled. You're going to keep the cool, huh, sensei? Nishiki leaned on the wall and decided to think for a bit.

"I'm going to change, then I'm goin' home. I'll be here for my shift tomorrow." He said before leaving. He was abandoning the Manager's orders, but Nishiki was a tough guy. I'm sure he can get home safe. And he's smart... in a way. Yoshimura-san. You give me courage.

I ran out of the room myself to find Touka. I heard the door shut. It wasn't Nishiki, he was changing before he left. I ran outside too. There I saw Touka slowly walking to a crosswalk. It was dark out. I ran beside to Touka. Her breathing indicated she wanted to cry. I guess she knew them that well.

"Touka-chan." I placed my hand on her shoulder. Not much time had passed before she swiped my hand away.

"Shut up..." The black haired girl said. She seemed very threatened and insecure. I couldn't really know what she was going through- I didn't know the two victims of Jason long enough to be this heart broken- I could only cry because I caused someone's death. I could only blame myself for what happened.

She was about to storm off in rage, most likely to go kill something, but I took the risk of grabbing her hand before then. Doing so could cause me injury or death. And thus I made it so she wouldn't attack me. I embraced her. There was nothing else I could do- get attacked or let her run away. I don't want either to happen. I want her to stay and reconcile.

I never realized how soft she really was- how delicate she really seemed. She was about my height. I guess we were alike. We blamed ourselves for what happen, but we have no reason in doing so. I would like to become stronger to defend help people, like in shounen manga. Touka would like to kill and fight others in order to keep people safe. We both had the same dream that we wished to achieve through different methodical ideas, but neither of us really had the strength to do so.

I'm not going to cry. I'm not going to cry. I'm not going to cry! Why did I feel like crying? Was it the effect of Touka? Was her aura changing me inside? Was the sympathetic part of Touka slowly dragging me with it to the point that I want to shed tears? I don't care. I'm not crying again, and I don't want to see Touka cry again.

I hugged her harder, squeezing a bit, to make sure she was still here in reality. To make sure she wasn't going to burst into a fit or shed the pacific ocean from her eyes.

I backed away from her as I placed my hands on both of her shoulders. "Touka. Let's get through this- together, with everyone." I said. It sounded cheesy, but it was a personal want. I wanted to get through this with everyone else. I don't want others to die. I don't want to cry. I don't want to say goodbye. Not again.

Touka looked back to me. I've never seen a more happy and cute Touka. "Y-yeah!" She said.

We went back into the shop and into the back. By that time, Yomo, Yoshimura and Enji were the only ones left. Irimi had left with Nishiki apparently.

"Ah, Touka." The Manager said looking at her. "Kaneki needs a mask. Could you take him to Uta's shop? He needs a mask just in case." The man then asked her.

"Uh, sure." The girl uninterestingly replied. The original Touka. Good, she's not going to burst.

Touka and I then headed out for "Uta's shop". I don't really see the point in getting a mask- Jason probably already saw my face, right? I have no idea.

"Hey." The voice to my left said as we were walking to get the "mask".

"Y-yeah?" I responded to the voices' owner.

"You better not tell anyone about me crying, or I'll bust your head open." She threatened me. If she ever did that, I'd feel excruciating pain. I doubt she'd do it though. She'd probably do something more mild though... best to not say anything anyways it seems.

"Okay, okay." I gestured my hands pushing down on the air in front me slowly.

"Good." Touka said.

It would take us a bit longer before we got to the place where I'd get my "mask". The place we went to: HySy ArtMask Studios. An interesting name, most likely run by an interesting person.

"Let's go." I heard Touka command we do.

I followed her without hesitation into the building.

Inside we went through a few things. I didn't pay attention much, I was much too fascinated with the assortment of things. Many different types of masks- it was like a freak show or creative talent contest that seemed to go on in here.

And their we were. Inside this room filled with masks. Masks on tables on the walls- everywhere.

"Uta? Uta where are you?" Touka called out to the owner, looking here and there.

I saw a small cage looking thing- a white cloth on top of something that was sitting on a stand.

I went over and unclothed it, and there sat an odd looking person. I backed away frightened and made a startled sound.

"Hello there." The strange person said.

"H-hello there..." I quietly responded calming myself.

"Uta. What are you doing?" Touka asked the man as he got up from his position.

"Just playing." He replied.

Touka walked over to him and the two started to discuss things as I looked around the room some more. There were eerie and frightening masks all around, and at the same time cool and beautiful looking ones. Would I choose one of these?

"Kaneki-kun." Uta called me over. "Have a seat. I just need to take some measurements and uh, ask you some questions. I like my masks to define both a person's physical build and emotions. How does that sound, Kaneki?"

"U-um, alright." I hesitantly said, still slightly startled with this, assuming he's a friend of Touka's and this emo-looking, ghoul. His hair seemed to go to one side; his ears were pierced; that clothes. It looked very gothic, yet this man was very nice. A joker, maybe, but he had manners and seemed even nicer than Touka.

He took a ruler and measured lots of things. I'm not exactly sure how you measure people to make masks but he seemed to be a professional at what he was doing.

"So, Kaneki." The man asked me as he wrote down measurements.

"What's your favorite color?" He asked his first questions.

I don't know. Uh, purple! No wait, maybe black? Hmm... a difficult question. But, I'd probably have to go with the latter- for the reason of it being a good representation of me right now.

"Black? Can you give me a reason as to why that is?" The black haired man asked, sitting down in another chair after he was done taking my measurements. I had no idea where Touka had gone off to, but she wasn't here. I don't know why that was a problem, but it certainly made me feel a little bit more uncomfortable with this creepy dude.

I don't know. It fits in with me but I don't know why in all honesty. "Because... I feel in pain; scared; terrified; I can get killed! I don't want to be caught up in this..." I mumbled off.

The older man took a hand as he got up and placed it on my shoulder. I looked up to him. "Kaneki. Do you believe in love and the happiness of the heart?"

Love? Happiness of the heart? What does this have to do with our conversation. I'm not sure how I'm supposed to answer that question either.

"Y-yes?" I tried my best to make my question seem like a statement, however I doubt it worked well.

"Kaneki. I've worked with many people before. Many faces. Those who had love or a form of joy had legitimate happiness. Those who were misers and loners **[2]** had no real happiness residing in their hearts." The man explained to me. I don't know- what does this have to do with a mask? "As long as you can find happiness somewhere, there's no need to feel afraid."

Oh. So this was him learning about me. My emotions. What lie within me. I see now. But would any of this incorporate to my mask or future greetings? I don't know. There's a lot of things I don't seem to know.

"So... Touka tells me you're a half ghoul. I think I have a black design that'd fit good with you... hey, which eye turns red?" He then asked me. Had Touka really spilled everything she knew about me?

"M-my left eye." I said. Wait, no. If she told him everything, I wouldn't have had to answer that question.

He stared at his clipboard for a moment, before doodling here and there and then placing the object upside down.

I looked at him as he looked back to me. I felt like quivering a little bit- this Uta guy was really intimidating.

"Alright. I think that's enough que- actually, one more: what do you think about yourself?" He asked.

I certainly wasn't expecting that question. And besides, who asks someone 3 questions and then says "alright, that's it?" Who in their right mind does that? I'd expect an interview, but maybe not. "Maybe my personality is that shallow. I'm the much of a bland person- uninteresting, unstimulating... that's all I think of myself as. Worthless, trash, useless and undesirable. How many more adjectives could describe me? Unavailing? Pointless? Unproductive? UNFORTUNATE? UNWELCOMED?! I'm not trash for any particular reason- I didn't do something bad. It's more along the lines that I'm trash because I think of such cowardice things. I don't have confidence or courage, and so I put myself low. I don't have the ability to stand up and bravely do something; I can't help others because I'm too scared and frightened. What good am I in life if I can't even do things like that?" I thought. No, I spoke. It'd been too late before I realized that. The man in front of my eyeing me carefully. Was he going to scrutinize what I said? I said a lot of atrocious and unfathomable words about myself. I stick myself lower than ghouls- lower than murderers. I guess that's the best I can do.

"My. What a large vocabulary you have for yourself." Uta commented. An odd reaction to say the least. "But don't you ever think about others? What about old man Yoshimura? Touka? Do you have any friends? Have you ever listened to what they think about you?"

Yes I did but- but... but what? I never listened to them did I. I did- I heard them speak; I heard the words from their mouths, but all I did was deny those claims. What claims were they? I don't know. I've convinced myself I'm a dejected human that's only attatchment to the world was wanting to live with the nonexistent dream of helping those I knew... how stupid can I get. What do others think of me? Am I really so unfortunate? Did the others take me in unsolicited? Did they do this out of their own free time and will? I don't know- I'm vexed now. I can't understand people anymore. Am I or am I not worth living on this earth?! Someone answer my call! Answer my question! Please... I want to know... I want to know everything. I don't know everything about myself... Okaa-san... you always told me to let others hurt me rather than hurt others... but you never told me how to get through something like this. You didn't explain emotional battles with myself- should I hurt myself? Should I not? What is the choice I'm supposed to mentally make?

I calmed myself from the mental panic I was going through. "No... I don't believe in myself enough for that..." I said.

"You don't need to believe in yourself. You just need to let others believe in you." The man told me. What a way to say it. If I don't support myself consciously, how do I get through in life living off of other's support? I don't know- but I'll try. For a man to be able to put up with me like this- with my fit of hating myself, he seemed worthy of being deemed wise. Maybe not so much as to "wise", but I could trust some, if not all, of the information and advice he'd just given than given to me.

"Okay." I finally stopped my antic.

"Then that's all." He replied. I expected as much. "You can go now- Touka should be waiting outside."

Oh, so that's where she was! Good to know, I guess. "Thank you, Uta-san." I told him. Maybe I can implement what he said into my life subtly or abruptly- maybe I won't at all. Only time can tell for now.

I walked out of the studio to find that the world still solemnly gray. The clouds were still there, but the rain had stopped. I can't say I didn't enjoy it, but it was a feeling of longing and loneliness right now.

"Come on, let's go." Touka said as she started walking before me- her hood up, her walk prideful. At times she could be admirable. For a person such as myself hating the world, she was the star. She was what we could look up to... to try and give us hope.

I walked behind her. The stride of the strong. I wish I could have something similar to that... but, for now, I can provide support... yeah. I'm not a fighter. I'm not aggressive. I'm a support- I just help if I can. I probably can't, but that's just how my brain works. Maybe I lack neurons. I don't know- I didn't study health and such.

What am I doing still complaining about this? I wasn't ostracized and I surely aren't stupid. I'm an aspiring writer who has his major in literature (big surprise). I'm sighing now. What is it I lack emotionally? Can I not get over this quickly?

"Say, Kaneki... do you think, if I died, people would be sad? I mean, if Yoriko didn't find out." Touka asked slowing down enough for me to catch up to her.

Where was this coming from? A frightened Touka? No. Maybe she was just curious what other people thought of her- like I was. Touka, you've gone a step ahead of me. I look at that question with trepidation. In fear of the answer. You take it head on. More admiration for you, Touka-chan.

"I think so. Yoshimura would be sad. Yomo. Irimi. Enji. Even I. So... so don't do anything stupid Touka! Don't- don't go to-to, hell or heaven. Stay here with us. Please." I told her. Sure, it was a step out of my character, but I wanted to convey everyone's feelings to her. This was the truth. Nothing more.

The black haired girl in front of me **[3]** smiled. "Okay. Thanks, Ken."

* * *

 **1: A reference to Charlie Chaplin's The Great Dictator film speech, 1940. I recommend you listen/watch it (the film or the speech). It's fantastic.**

 **2: A reference to Charles Dickens' character Scrooge in his famous 1843 novella _A Christmas Carole_.**

 **3: For all you anime-only people, Touka's hair is black not purple.**

 **Sooner or later I'll have to implement my own story and characters into this because I don't have the effort to remember every character and event in the manga and re-adapt it into this fanfiction.**


	6. Magnifique Amitié

"Ohayou gozaimasu!" I said to a customer that had just walked in.

It'd been a few days since Touka took me to see Uta- the man who'd make my "mask". It'd been only the day before then that Hinami and Ms. Ryouko were killed by my selfishness. I still blame myself, even with Uta's advice. I was stuck in a sort of limbo, if that was a possibly good example. The time since then was stretched- it felt long. Today felt good, however. I felt... more at ease, than these past few days. Maybe because I've been around this "family" for a while. Laughing, happy, sad, mad; there's a lot of emotions a person has through an ordinary day. Here there was a lot more of laughing and happiness. Mr. Yoshimura and his wisdom. Nishiki and Touka's "fights". Irimi and Enji's friendliness and jokes. Renji-san's mysterious-person and blank-like attitude. And of course, the customers. From the strangers that brought in stories of other places and people, to the people like Hide and Yoriko. This was home- not in a literal concept, but in an emotional attachment sort of thing. I loved to be here more than anywhere else. With the people who were my "family". With those I trusted, and with those I could talk with. I'm progressing more in my path of accepting this life. More so, in the path of accepting myself.

I talked with customers. I followed Touka's orders. This was the average day. Average days were often. Thus they were "average". When the next unnatural day would occur was up to society. Where information went. Who received it. Their plans. Time does not tell events that happen. It is people themselves, apparently.

"Ken. could you go check up stock?"

"Sure." I replied to the girl who'd asked me.

Ah, Touka. She's finally been more nice to me. Sometimes she'll get mad and try and attack me, but, for the most part, she's been kindhearted. Well, to me at least. She and Nishiki still have their battles- I think it'd be more accurate to call them anger competitions.

It was morning- 9 AM, maybe, I didn't check the time.

I checked our stock- everything seemed good. We needed a bit more bread though. I wrote that down. Coffee? Won't need another order until next month at the current rate it's selling.

People weren't coming out as much, and so we had more coffee than usual. Do to Hinami and Ms. Fueguchi's murders being on the news. The police department knew they were ghouls, but for whatever light they had in their heart, they were treating the deaths like homicides. Because of the brutal way they were killed. The pictures of those savage events were leaked online... and I was an unfortunate person who saw them. It made me sick. Absolutely disgusted. The man who did that -Yamori- deserved more than death and torture. He deserved to rot, not in hell, but on the streets of the human world. Frail and without power. A painful sight I saw indeed.

Done with my checklist, I walked back to the counter where Touka was and told her of my inspection.

"Just some bread huh? Business is slow... and people are afraid." I heard Nishiki sighed as he cleaned one of the tables. "Eh, that's what you get for messing with a ghoul like him."

"Bast-"

"Enough, Touka." Yoshimura interrupted the girl's insult. "You might find it harsh and uncaring of him to say that, but Nishiki has truth in his words. Hinami chose to stay with her mom and die with her. If you look at it in a lighter perspective, she didn't want her mom and dad to be lonely. She herself didn't want to be lonely." The old man said.

Touka calmed down a bit. She still seemed furious at the tall blond, but overall was in a relaxed state.

"Touka, when did Uta say Kaneki was to get his mask?" He asked the girl.

"He said a week at most, I think- I don't know, I waited outside, ask Ken." She answered as she looked over to me, crossing her arms.

I looked over to the Manager, who looked over to me. "W-what she said." I told him. The way the man turned his head seemed unnatural. Or elegant. One or the other. It was like some sort of a bird... yes, a bird. The pivotal joint in his body moved, although not in full effect, like that one bird... what was it called? An owl, that's right.

"I see. Well it seems you'll have to wait until then." The manager said. He then walked over to the back. He might have been wise, but sometimes he was a mysterious figure.

And wait? The importance of a mask was to hide a ghoul's identity... I'm not ecstatic or in a flurry of excitement for the thing. I don't even know what it looks like. So what was the point in having that sort of tone, as if I'm waiting impatiently for it? It means nothing, most likely. But being a major in literature, it bugged me- what the point was in saying something unimportant like that?

I looked over to Touka. She made a look of 'I don't know' to me.

The day passed by nicely. It was about six. There hadn't been a customer in an hour and a half. So they really were scared of the ghoul killings and the killing of ghouls. At least they have a bit of humanity in them for us. Even if it's a small amount, it's worth a lot to us. To us who only have the love of each other.

It was dark out. Six and it's dark out huh? It'll be winter soon.

"Before it gets too dark, I'd like you all to close up shop- go to where it is you'd like to go shopping and then head home. Please stay with one another. If you plan on staying out longer than that, be cautious of all things suspicious." The Manager said.

"Hai." We all responded in unison.

We cleaned up. Wiped the tables, the counters, put the coffee and bread and everything else away; swept, cleaned dishes- all of it was done around a quarter 'till seven. The café looked spotless. Absolutely magnificent. A sight to behold as a butler's or maid's paradise of cleanliness.

"Alright, we'll be heading out, Manager." Nishiki said as he, Enji and Irimi all walked out of Anteiku. Renji-san was no where to be found- he probably gathering food or something of the sort. Either way he'd be able to take care of himself. The Manager wished them all safe trip to their house (what an odd thing to think). Touka slept upstairs, so there was no need for her to go anywhere.

I changed into my own clothes- a t-shirt, some black pants, my tennis shoes, and the blue hoodie I had brought today.

I walked out and headed for the door when I was done.

"Have a safe trip **[1]** \- if you die I'll kill you for being weak." Touka said.

How unamusing. How un-cute. "Bye, Touka." I said, walking out of the café. It really was dark now. The sky held not a single ray of light. The clouds were no where to be found. Street lights prevented me from seeing the beautiful stars, however. Quite despicable of them. The beauty of the stars is something I wanted to see right now.

I started to walk home, but decided to turn back and head to the book store. It wasn't that late- surely at least some book store in town was still open. Taking the events of Ms. Fueguchi and her daughter killed and the fact that it was dark, it may be a pipe dream of mine for the book store to be open. But, there's only one way to find out. I think I'd like to buy another Sen Takatsuki novel, should they be open. Yeah... I wonder if they'll have any left though. She's a pretty popular author.

As I approached the shopping center, I could see some stores still open. Maybe it was a dedication to their customers, as there were many people inside them. Not like a normal day with good business, but their were more humans than expected.

I walked to the book store and there stood it. Open. "Yes!" I yelled aloud subconsciously. I quickly covered my mouth at my sudden shout. Hide's right- I'm too much of a book nerd... but that's alright.

I entered the store. For some reason, I sniffed the air- a whiff of books. It smelled great, however odd that sounds. Now... where were some Sen Takatsuki books... let me see...

I searched the store for a few minutes when I found some. Read this one, that one, this one is my favorite... are there none that I haven't read? Oh... here. "Solidity of Humanity" it's called. Apparently it was her sixth book. About a boy who was different, and the cruel ways humanity treated him. Sounds like the ghouls. I wonder if she's an activist for ghoul rights... who knows. I picked up the book and headed to the check out.

Some man bumped into me.

"Oh, pardon." He said. I looked to him. He was an odd looking man- handsome, wearing nice looking clothes and had the look of a rich man.

"I-it's okay." I told him.

"Sen Takatsuki? She seems to be a very popular these days... and, why are you out this late?" He asked me.

"I-I was just coming back from work..." I responded.

"And where might you work?"

"The café Anteiku."

The man's eyes widened a bit. "Might you know Touka-chan?"

"U-uh, y-yes. I do." I replied.

"Très bien!" He obnoxiously yelled out. I think it was French- I'm not sure. "Let me pay for that book Mr..."

"Kaneki. Ken Kaneki."

"Mr. Kaneki. As an apology for bumping into you, and from a friend of a friend." He said. So this man knew Touka? I wonder if she's nice to him. "I am Shuu Tsukiyama."

He paid for the book just as he said he would. I saved ¥3125.58 **[2].**

The both of us exited the store, all the while talking. We talked about all sorts of things- from Anteiku to books to favorite foods. He was a nice man overall, this Tsukiyama. And then I thought... if he knew Touka and Anteiku, wouldn't that mean he's a ghoul? Sure it's based off of no evidence, but I get a hunch that maybe he is one. I think it'd be better off if I didn't... um, ask him if he was one. He might insult me, get mad at me, or get suspicious of my asking. So I decided not to ask him. We walked to an intersection, still talking, until he said that he had to go the way I wasn't.

"Well, Kaneki, I shall come by one day to talk. Tres bien!" Tsukiyama said.

"Oh- um, bye." I answered.

He seemed nice. Yes. Maybe this could be a friendship between us.

I got home, took my shoes off, and laid down (with my book in hand). I sighed. I've gotten to know a lot of weird people, but that's what makes them great.

I started to read.

The words were latching onto me- I wanted to read more and more. Takatsuki knew how to capture someone, how to grab them by the heart and never let go. Ah, Sen Takatsuki- I aspire to be like you. A brilliant writer and story teller. At this rate it might not happen. I've been skipping some of my classes at university... and now I'm a ghoul too... man, everything is happening too quick. At least let me catch my breath, world.

I fell asleep during my thoughts. It wasn't a blissful sleep. I dreamed about the book I was reading, Solidity of Humanity- it's main character, the story the setting; I imaged it all in my head. It was beautiful and at the same time terrifying. To live in that kind of world would be... hell. But there was also the good in some of humanity. The good f those that want to help. I dreamt of those people as well... as many as I could make up in my involuntarily made dream.

The alarm went off. I woke up. Ugh. I rubbed my eyes and got out of bed. What time was it? Six thirty. Great.

I got ready and turned on the TV.

"There is a gourmet ghoul on the loose. The CCG have stated they will be deploying investigators to the 20th Ward." A man on the TV said. Gourmet ghoul? Those are the ones that kill for fun... I think. I'm not exactly sure- maybe they make meals... out... of people... maybe it's exquisite to ghouls... no! Don't think about it! If I think about it I'll only get more worked up and nervous. Then I'll fail at my job and be distracted all day... just calm down. It won't get Hide. It won't get Hide. Just remind myself it's not going to get Hide.

"A bit about gourmet ghouls: Gourmet ghouls tend to eat, or serve, other ghouls in restaurant-like places. It is a show for them. One gourmet ghoul location that was captured showed that ghouls tend to stay anonymous, and wear their masks during such an event. These ghouls are also known to be cannibalistic. In the same case, the CCG witnessed the gourmet ghoul eating one of its kind." The man on TV said. Are you kidding? They're cannibals? So... they don't have to eat humans? What if I became a cannibal like them... it'd be killing those monsters and receiving nutrients... right? "The gourmet ghoul of that specific case is most likely the one that's been killing here in the 20th Ward, as it got away from its assumed previous location."

...

The door started to knock. Who's that?

I walked over to the door and opened it. "Hide?"

"Yo, Kaneki!" Hide said smiling. "You haven't gone to the university in a few days... are you okay?" He asked.

"U-uh, yeah... just... a friend died." I replied. Ryouko and Hinami weren't realy my friends- more like acquaintances. But, in Anteiku, we treated everyone like friends or family. And so, I suppose that saying "friend" was correct.

"Oh." Said he. "I'm sorry for your loss. But Kaneki. That doesn't mean you should not come. Just 'cause something sad happens doesn't mean you need to skip school. That's what your other friends are here for- to comfort you. And to have fun. Right, Kaneki?" He told me. This little goofball was wiser than any wizard or leader of any country. Arigato, Hide, once again.

He then took both of his hands, with a wide grin, and placed them on both of my shoulders. "Ne, how'd it go with Touka-san?" He asked. It was bound to happen. He'd make me feel better, and then he'd tease me. Oh the horror! I blushed some. Not because I liked her (because I really didn't), but because to be compared with a magnificent girl such as herself, would be blasphemy. Also, I'd never really been with a girl other than Rize... so, being a male, it was going to happen, right?

"Eh.. um, to clear that up: we aren't going out... we were with someone who ditched us I guess." I sort of lied.

Of course, being Hide, he wouldn't take that as an actual excuse. "Ne, stop lying." He eyed me. "I can see it in your eyes." He can see what in my eyes? What's in my eyes? Hunger? Hide! Emphasize Hide! Explain to me!

"Oh. I forgot to ask, why are you here?" I asked the blond.

"The professors asked me to drop this off to you. I'm not sure how you're going to finish all this but, if you need some help, I'm your guy!" Said blond ecstatically said.

"Arigato, Hide." I replied with a smile. Hide. Always looking our for me. I should do something in return. Maybe, someday.

"Alright, well, I have somewhere else to be. Have fun with Touka!" He said as he dashed down the street. I sighed. Touka, huh?

Well. I suppose it's time for work. I started to walk towards Anteiku. And as I did so, I recollected the words of the TV earlier. So it's getting even more dangerous in the 20th Ward. Sure, there's ghouls everywhere, but there's... these more dangerous ones. The binge eater. Jason. Now the gourmet. Why are there so many new dangerous ones popping up all of a sudden? And more importantly, why are they in MY life? It's a selfish though, but that's how we are. Humans. Or rather, those of us with human minds.

I got to Anteiku. I opened the door and entered. What was today going to bring?

* * *

 **1: The Japanese tend to say that as a "good luck" or general "goodbye".**

 **2: 3125.81 Yen is equivalent to about 26.58 USD (at the date of writing this part of the chapter, December 21 2016).**

 **2 days late due to Christmas and Christmas Eve. Or, whatever religion it is you celebrate. To be honest I could care less.**

 **Also, I will now be using multiple chapter for "arcs" instead of one-chapter-arcs. Hooray.**


	7. The Mask Now Hides Me

I walked through the door. Touka and the others were working like normal. And there sat he- the one from last night. Shuu Tsukiyama.

"Ah, Kaneki. Glad to see you." He said to me.

Tsukiyama seemed like a generally good guy. He (for an unknown reason) bought the book I wanted yesterday after running into me. I felt terrible guilty for making him spend money for no reason, but he insisted on doing so with no foundation that was telling him to. It was more of a random act of kindness than that of an apology that you do to make up to someone.

I looked to him. "Hello, Tsukiyama-san." I told the older man.

He came over to me after quickly finishing his coffee. "Say Kaneki, would you like to meet up sometime? I would like to discuss some of Sen Takatsuki's books with you." He said. He went on about a few other things, but I decided to agree. After my shift ended I'd meet up with him. So I've met someone other than Rize that could be a bibliophile like me... or, at least, someone who could communicate with my interests on books.

"Um... how about when my shift ends?" I asked the man.

"Trés bien. See you then, Kaneki-kun." Tsukiyama said before leaving the café. My confront with him only lasted that of a minute, so no real time was lost, but even so, Touka started to nag at me for wasting time.

"Ken. Stop slacking off. You're here to work, not talk with a bastard like him." The black haired girl told me. My heart stopped for a second. A bastard... like him? What are you talking about Touka? He seems like a nice guy! Was he youe ex-boy... friend- ah. So there was my mistake. I assumed he was a nice person... but for all I know he's a sadistic psychopath. That's what most cliché books often have. A seemingly nice character turning out to be a vicious person that hunts prey for the fun of it... before assuming anymore, I'm going to ask Touka why she calls him a "bastard".

I looked at her while she was making coffee. That sounds creepy. Good job Ken Kaneki. "Touka..." I said in a hushed voice making sure that no customers heard. I got closer to her until I was next to her and started to help out. "Why is he a... bastard?" I asked said girl.

She seemed thoroughly disappointed in me for asking that. Maybe now wasn't that right time... maybe it was an obvious answer. I don't know.

"He tried to eat me once." The girl said. I'm not sure if I heard correctly. Touka-chan... did she just say that Tsukiyama tried to eat her? So... this man was a ghoul... and he was cannibalistic? "He's a gourmet- the one you've probably seen on the news. The man is a damned sadist and psychopath." She continued. It seems I hit the target bulls eye- I somehow guessed he was both sadistic and psychopathic, just as Touka had stated. "He might eat you- so promise me, you won't get near the shit. I will fucking beat you if you do. Do not show up to whatever hellish scheme he's probably planning."

Maintain my distance from him. That's what she was saying, right? Don't get involved with him, I'll probably die because I'm so weak. She could at least be a little nicer about me being weak... but unfortunately, it was the sad truth. It's plausible I couldn't even protect myself from a raccoon. If those even show up here... I'm not sure- I've never seen a wild one.

"Okay, okay. I won't show up... but I feel bad when I think he'll probably be waiting... feeling betrayed." I told Touka my thoughts. She stopped what she was doing and sighed.

Touka then glanced over to me, keeping her eyes fixated on me. "Will he feel bad for eating you?" She questioned me.

Noted. "Good point..." I said defeated.

I kept working my shift through the hours. A few hours later, as Touka and I were in the back getting more supplies, the Manager came in.

"Kaneki, Touka- Enji and Nishiki will take over for you two. Uta said he was finished with Kaneki's mask, so if you'd be so kind Touka as to take him." The albino-haired man said.

"What?! Uta finished it in less than a day?!" Touka abruptly asked. Whether or not her words reached the customers or not was a good question, however neither of us could answer that question at the moment. I doubt anyone had the care to answer the question anyways.

The Manager smiled happily. "He said he worked all night perfecting it, supposedly."

The girl sighed loudly. "Fine. But I better get paid for the hour." She said.

"If that's what it will take." Replied the older of the three of us.

"Let's go Kaneki. Get changed." She said as she headed upstairs to her room.

 _"At least she agreed_ _."_ I thought to myself.

We walked out of the building less than 20 minutes later and headed for Uta's shop. Remembering him is kind of freaky... he looks emo.

"Ken. What does cake taste like?" Touka asked me. That was... unexpected.

"Where is this coming from?" I asked said girl.

She hesitated for only a moment before telling me the reason. "Yoriko made a cake for me... and she told me to tell her if I liked it... and what I thought it tasted like. So, I'm asking you if yo-"

"Coffee can be made many ways. If you add a lot of sugar, it'll make the coffee painfully sweet." I cut her off explaining in the best way I could what cake was. "But, if you add just the right amount, you get a good, delicious sweet. Cake is like the frosted, soft and edible version of coffee, albeit with different flavors. If you want to see what it tastes like we can sell it to customers like a 'do you know what this taste is'."

She glared at me. "I. Will not. Under any circumstances. Give away the cake Yoriko put effort in. To making."

I could tell that like a lion she was internally yelling. Even the cold-hearted Touka had people she'd do anything for. How sweet. "Then... we could sell part of it and you can... eat the other part... I guess." I told her. I wouldn't want to force myself to eat human food if I didn't have to, but whatever works for her. It's ironic. I can't even call food "food" anymore. It's just "human food" now. I become more of a ghoul with every passing day it seems.

"Okay- as long as the work she did for me isn't done for nothing." Touka happily said.

I made a fake smile and scratched the side of my head.

I mumbled something to myself. It was an experiment, to see if the words fit together because I was in vacillation on whether or not they did. "It's sweet like you, Touka." Was this heresy?! Was calling this girl "sweet" a crime? Was it truly a crime against humanity, in all seriousness, a crime? Am I going to get smite-d by the one above for saying such words? Hopefully it is not heretic to the laws of nature, as the words- they move perfectly off the tongue and the mouth. Wondrous and ponderous!

"What?" I hear the girl next to me ask. I'm contemplating my life choices right now- there are so many things I haven't seen, so many people I haven't said good bye too, I still haven't gone back to the university!

"N-nothing." I answered.

I quickly glimpsed at her. She was not mad or angry. What a relief. If she heard me it'd probably be the next Hiroshima and Nagasaki... no, wait, I shouldn't say that... that's rude.

"Alright." I heard her say after my panic.

I sighed. Safe. But for how long?

We reached Uta's place, for the second time in two days. We entered the shop.

"Ah, Kaneki." I heard Uta say from somewhere not visible to me. "I think you'll come to liking this. Just give me a few minutes."

A few minutes? Is this professionalism? Debatable. But, we waited anyways. And about what this, think?

Think? It's an assumption then. But... he seems to have put a lot of work into it, so whether or not I like it, I must humbly accept it. He turned it around- and there it sat. It looked creepy at first, but I got the idea the mas was giving. I understood what it was made for.

After around ten minutes or so, he finally came to us. He sat in a chair with the mask in his hand. It was turned around so the back was visible rather than the front.

Black- the color I had told him was my favorite. It was made of fine leather. A mouth- much like a restrained asylum monster, and I thought ugly of myself. Two bolt-like decorations coming from the front neck area right below the chins on each side probably representing how I'm artificially made, a literary allusion to Frankenstein. An eyepatch that was to cover the eye I normally hid with another eyepatch. It was indeed very sinister and spooky looking mask, but apparently that was all ghouls' masks... or most. Indeed it was strange at first, but my mind denied that accusation- rather than a menacing looking mask to wear, I saw it as something that I could hide behind. Maybe a sort of alter ego could be created with the mask... no. All I need to do is hide behind it- do not become a sadistic ghoul... do not hide behind someone you aren't, hide in both cowardice and bravery. It makes no logical sense, but neither does the hate ghouls get from humans.

He held it in front of me. I took it.

"Try it on, let's see if it fits- well, I'm sure it does, but just for the looks, let's see." Uta asked me to do.

I obliged with his request.

I fit it on my face. It would be a lie to say the leather made me feel a bit claustrophobic, but it seemed to fit nicely.

Touka came around from behind me and looked at me. "That fits perfectly on you and you look... cool, but, you don't have the skills to match that "coolness"." The girl half-insulted me. So... I look cool, huh? And why throw in my poor ability in fighting? I swear she's only nice to me because the Manager tells her to and because she doesn't want me to blackmail her with her crying. I don't really see the point in keeping that a secret, but whatever she'd prefer is fine by me I guess.

Uta brought out a small mirror from his pocket. "Take a look."

I looked at myself. It was nerve-racking- how well it looked on me, that is. I was always the quiet guy that read books in the corner with the one friend. But now... I look like... a ghoul. There isn't really a better analogy I can currently brainstorm. I looked at myself and I seemed to give off malicious vibes.

People... right? We can be the most innocent people in the world, but as soon as we put something like a mask on, something that hides our true selves, we tend to become different people in spirit. In mind we acknowledge what we're doing and keep our same personality, but our spirits, our aura, deviates from that of our normal tone.

"So, do you like it, Kaneki?" Uta questioned me.

"H-hai." I replied.

"Good, now let's go. We have quite a ways of walking to do." Touka said as she walked over to get her coat.

"Touka, do you just want to get away from me?" Uta jokingly asked.

Touka turned her head and looked over to him. "I came to visit, right? Why would I want to get away from you? I came inside the building when I could have waited outside."

"Hmm. True. Oh well. Kaneki, be sure to come back sometime... and, if you'd ever like to see how a real Ward acts, maybe you'd like to stay over? Maybe we'll see some cannibalism..." Uta wondered off.

Cannibalism? No, no. We're leaving! Yes! Leaving! "Arigato, Uta-san." I said and headed off with Touka.

A mask huh? Basically the thing what represents a ghoul, other than their kagune. Speaking of kagune... I don't think I've seen Touka's... even when Hinami and Ms. Fueguchi were... killed. No wait... she did... but I was too frightened then to notice and remember it I guess. Damn. Cowardice strikes again.

"Hey... Touka... do you mind... I mean, this might sound like an odd request, but... would you mind showing me your... kagune?" I asked after much hesitation between words.

At first my _what could have been entreaty_ might have sounded a bit obscene, however I got the message through! No... hold on... would asking to see her kagune be some sort of a ghoul fetish? No, I shouldn't think about that. Pondering such a thing will only affect my view of ghouls... well, not like I can blame them for such a weird lik- enough.

Touka made an odd sound of question, like a big "Huh?"

"Why? Who asks something like that?" She questioned my motive. (Well, not like I really had one)

"I-I just wanted to know what it would look like is all." I quickly thought up. That reason isn't very convincing, but neither is anything else I tend to lie about.

"Fine. But not outside." She responded.

Touka... agreed? Last week she was scrutinizing everything I did and refused almost everything... but now she's... agreeing with something like this? It's an undeveloped and unnatural literary character development, in more specific terms.

It was cold. While we were in the shop it had sprinkled a bit, so the ground and the trees and other biological, unmoving organisms were damp and wet. A briskly humid air it was right now, yet a beautifully made scenery of Tokyo existed. The sun shining through areas in which the clouds could not control their land over; the sun's rays hitting the ground and warming it up with a heavenly glow; the white, crystal-blue like fogginess that was the air surrounding us everywhere... it was magnificent, a true beauty. Touka, with her emo-looking self, only added to the scenery along with the other people and domesticated or wild animals. I cannot lie, at the very least, I can call her cute. Even if I'll probably never say it to her face: when she's just looking on ahead she's amazing, when we're having fun she's fun to be around, and when she's with Yoriko there's a certain level of diabetic-causing, sugary goodness she just seems to produce around her. Maybe if I had chosen Touka, like Hide was joking about, instead of Rize, maybe she would have turned me down nice enough for me to accept it... and maybe she wouldn't eat me, her being a ghoul and all. I guess that's me being selfless again... huh? I want nothing more than people to do good to me; I would like to go back and redo my mistakes, but then again, we all do- there's nothing I need more now than the hands I have in front of me. The hands to grip the future. What a cheesy thing to say... but nonetheless, what a true thing to say. I should be grateful I'm alive and grateful for the people I have met that are helping me... that's all I need now more than that cheesy future! Yes!

"Nee... Ken." Touka called me. We were still on the street, but hardly anyone was around. "Will you... train, with me?" She asked. Quite a question there, Touka. You're asking the guy who could deflect a child's punches and fly to the West against a man (although the Americans would probably just throw me back). I looked around a bit- it seemed safe to talk about this sort of thing... I mean, I was asking her about her kagune earlier... why didn't I think about the public then?

"Um... sure. But, may I ask as to why you're asking me?" I looked at the girl. She seemed to make one of her little pout faces, when she was afraid to admit something.

"I want to fight that fucker Jason and... kill the bastard, and w-well, there's no one else I can really ask- Kouma and Irimi might brush it off and keep it a secret, Yomo wouldn't approve, Yoshimura would lecture me or tell everyone 'no one help her', and there's no way in hell I'd ask that Nishiki bastard." She explained to me.

"Alright, Touka." I said to her. If I trained with her, I'd get beat pretty bad, but that's okay. I will get stronger! Even if it's not a lot, I will not let anyone else at Anteiku suffer the fate as Ms. Fueguchi and her daughter. I don't want that again... that's my only wish... if there is a god... or a ghoul god out there, could you grant me that wish?

That night I slept okay. I usually did, but Rize would somehow slip into my mind and harass my dreams. Today was different. Today was... just, sleep.

* * *

This chapters inspiration: "I Love You", "Iron", "Brooklyn", "Run Boy Run" and "I Love You - Quintet Version" - By WOODKID (aka, Yoann Lemoine)

 _ **IMPORTANT**_ : Some people might have noticed a lot of flaws in grammar and spelling. I might have one of my friends do editing (at least some) because when I write something, I don't look it over... so, uh, yeah.


	8. Her Warmth Infects Me

**So. I will now be using PROPER honorifics instead of confusing the hell out of people.**

 **Also, sorry for the long ass delay. I had to get accustomed to school again, and then accustom myself to writing again.**

Today is another day of work. Isn't that magnificent? Of course, I wish I could say something such as that. We were in the back of Anteiku, in the small room where all of us gathered during meetings.

"Kaneki-kun... why is it that you left me all alone?" Asked the obnoxious, French accented man in front of me.

"I'm sorry but-"

He looked at me with a saddened face, "Did Touka-chan say something bad about me? Please do not believe such tales!"

"But Tsukiyama-san, I wa-"

The man cut me off again, "It seems I have been betrayed... quelle tristesse!"

I'm not sure what I should be feeling right now, but it isn't happiness. Maybe this is me feeling guilty for not showing up without cancelling. Am I to get bad karma for such a thing? No, as long as he doesn't figure out that Touka-chan persuaded me into not going -as long as he can only assume that happened- then I don't think "guilt" should be a worry of mine.

"I'm sorry Tsukiyama-san, but something came up. I received my mask yesterday," I told him. We didn't actually know each other as ghouls, since we never talked about it or brought it up. But, at this point, he surely must know. And thus there is no point in just saying "something came up," might as well just give him the truth.

"Très bien! May I see it, Kaneki-kun?" Tsukiyama-san asked me.

"I'm sorry, but I have work soon... maybe some other time," I responded. My shift was going to start in about 10 minutes. Touka-chan and the others were either working or somewhere else, so it was just the two of us in the room.

"Alright, then it is done! And Kaneki-kun, I would like to invite you to my house, I hope you do come this time," Tsukiyama told me. "May I ask when your next free day is?"

"Um... two days from now, so, Sunday," I answered him.

He smiled. "Then I shall make preperations, Au Revoir."

Damn. I've done something I might come to regret, but to rid this guilt I feel, I must attend whatever it is he's planning at his home. I expect it to be extravagant, being the person he is.

"Sayounara, Tsukiyama-san..." I said rather apathetically.

He walked out of the room, and then walked out of the café with that strange grin he always seemed to keep on him. Have I done something wrong?

I too went out of the room. As soon as I walked out, I could feel a vehement aura coming from somewhere. I quickly turned as if I knew where it was coming from. And there stood the reason of my quick body movement. Touka-chan looking at me disappointedly. That's what I saw. Had I committed a crime? No, no... this was just a Touka-chan thing. At the very least she wasn't ardent in yelling at me about said "mistake." I smiled at her. I don't think it helped my reputation... if I had any in the first place.

I walked to the back where Touka-chan was. "Do you think I made a mistake, Touka-chan?" I asked her.

"Didn't I tell you _not_ to get involved with him?" She asked me back.

"I see your point," I said. "But... I kinda felt guilty about it, leaving him there. I'm a nice guy, so try not to scrutinize me too much."

She sighed as she got through making a coffee. "If you're going to go, I'm going to go too, okay?"

"Oh? Touka-chan is worried?" I heard Koma-kun ask. "The Devil Ape approves," he whispered loud enough for us to hear.

"Shut up," Touka-chan exasperatingly said. Of course she was annoyed, but there was a portion of her that was cute when she said that.

Kouma-kun tapped my shoulder and went to deliver the coffee Touka-chan just made to the customer's table. "Good luck," he whispered into my ear. Come again? Did he just say "Good luck?" Good luck? With what? What do I need luck with? Can any of my emotions tell me? God? For all I know there's going to be a Japanese Inquisition against NEETs- but that has nothing to do with me... why did he wish me a good luck? Is today a bad horoscope for me? No, I don't believe in those... AAAHH! Just stop thinking about it, Ken.

"So I'm coming with you, right?" Touka-chan asked me.

"Hai, hai, whatever suits you," I replied.

She smiled lightly and got back to work. I don't really understand her. I don't understand women in general. Why won't anyone come to the bookstore with me? I internally cry. I must get back to work, unfortunately. Until the day is over. Until Sunday. Fridays were always fun, so there's nothing to worry about today. No boredom, hopefully nothing bad- just peace and relaxation with my... family? Yeah... since both of my parents have been dead for a long time, this could be my second family... or, my first family? Where do I get that idea from? It's as if there's something I can't remember. Ugh, getting caught up in thoughts again. I will limit my thinking for a time. That should help.

Twas the end of the day once again. It proves how pessimistically meaningless life is. The same thing happens. I get up, I have fun with the employees and the customers of Anteiku, I go home, I sleep- it might seem boring to another, but it was the ideal life for a person like me. No matter how many times I describe such a setting, the exquisiteness of this beautiful life will never cease to exist. I shall continue to look forward to days such as this.

I walked out of the building when Touka-chan stopped me. It wasn't a vicious grab or abrupt tap like she normally did, it was a soft tap on the shoulder. I looked behind me and there she was- a smile of glee on her face. I didn't have to look down because she and I were unfortunately the same height, which she sometimes teased me about.(even though I'm older)

"I never really thanked you... or if I did, I didn't thank you with heart," said she.

I was confused. Thanked me for what? "Ah... what do you mean?"

Her cheeks heated up slightly. The pink tint made her look more innocent than she really was. "For... hldnge."

I'd say I'm good in the language known as Japanese -Hirigana, Katakana, Kanji and some dialects- but whatever Touka-chan just said was nothing of the sort. "Uh, I don't really understand, could you emphasize?" I asked her, hoping she'd repeat herself.

The streets weren't too crowded today. The sun wasn't up, and at the same time it wasn't down- it floated on the horizon penetrating the atmosphere. The warmth of the sun helped to heat up whichever side was affected by it. The other side, of which the sun's rays did not hit, endured the cold. Windy- a term that was false in today's weather. Cloudy? Hardly. The beautiful, orange sky was mesmerizing. The beautiful orange color reflected in Touka-chan's eye. They were slightly watery. Her skin was smooth looking.

"For holding me... that day," the girl finally spoke in a clear voice.

"Oh. W-well I. Uh," I struggled to respond. She thanked me for _that_? Just a day or so ago, she told me she'd _kill me_ for telling anyone. I really don't understand women. "You're welcome, but I don't need a thanks- after all, we're friends, right?"

With the most adorable expression I'd ever seen on Touka-chan's face, she responded, "Y-yeah!"

I started to walk back home afterwards. There was no point in stopping by to eat if I couldn't eat anymore.

Maybe it's not girls that I don't understand. Maybe it's just one certain girl in particular. Who knows- nobody thinks like me, nobody sees the world as I do. It's up to me to uncover the facts. For one, I know it's a fact that I need to start attending Kamii University again or they'll kick me out. My excusable leave ends in four days, so that might cause problems should I not be ready. Life changes, that's a fact. I suppose that might dream world of a non-changing, fun world isn't possible. We must all adapt, we must all go through these things. It's a pain, especially for someone who reads books in most of his spare time like me, but there's no changing that, ironically.

Well then, until it's time to go to Tsukiyama-san's, it'll be the same ol' same ol.'

* * *

 **I promise I will not be late. I will post the next chapter on the 11th.**


	9. Prologue to Hell

**Welcome to the first ever ORIGIANL storyline for this... story... odd choice of words... anyways: all that mean is that character's will be introduced in different order, there will be different character development- you know what I mean. Thanks.**

Sunday. It's here. My meet up with Tsukiyama-san... with Touka-chan, I mustn't forget.

Should I wear something nice? Tsukiyama-san is very _classy_ , one might say, but he didn't specify if I should wear anything fancy or casual. Come to think of it, I don't think I own anything fancy... eheheh. That might cause problems if I'm ever invited somewhere... internal note- buy a suit or something nice. Hmm. But what should I wear? Sigh. I suppose I should just where something ordinary. If it comes to be a problem then I have an excuse- no worries.

I have a plain t-shirt and my light blue sweater on with a pair of pants. The eyepatch over my eye; socks; shoes- I'm not missing anything, right?

I looked at myself in the mirror. Eyepatch, huh, Hide? Quite a nickname. We are ghouls, but we look human. Isn't that basically a description of a monster? No, no... monsters can be friendly too. Let's just say that for now.

I'm ready to go out now. I ate breakfast. Wait, that means it's still too early for me to go to Tsukiyama-san's... ugh, I'm an idiot. I forgot we weren't supposed to go until later this afternoon...

I guess I could go to Anteiku and help out... no, then that'd just be wasting my day off. Wait, Touka-chan also has her day off today for the thing with that French horn (because he's loud). So, she isn't working. Aha, I know, I know now- I shall visit Anteiku and mess around with Touka-chan! Except not as intimate and sexual as that may have sounded! Thinking of having fun with Touka-chan, who's practically the Devil. Sigh, maybe I do like her romantically. Maybe not romantically, but maybe I like her as a person. She's been nicer to me, right? That smile of hers looks innocent and pure- is that what I want? To protect it? No, that lip curve would probably defend me, after all, I'm a pretty weak guy. That thought is ubiquitous.

Anyways, I'm going to leave now. Unlock the door, open the door, walk outside, lock the door, head through the gate. Simplicity is a virtue when less effort is required to do so- unless it involves stories, then complexity is the best.

Nothing eventful or worth mentioning to anyone happened on my way to Anteiku. It was barely going to be 10, so the chance of ghouls appearing was similar to that of a crippled mortal killing a Greek or Roman god. Or at least, I'm sure it is- I don't know, I've never witnessed or heard of a ghoul attack on a plain, sunny day. Sunny- yes, it was. The sun's warmth once again, like two days ago, struck me with warmth, while the other side was cold. It was like a replica of then- the breeze and the smell, specifically. Pardon, the entire day was an exact replica of then. That's what makes the day, because there's nothing to worry about, it's only peace and prosperity.

Ah, Anteiku. What a beautiful sight. I can feel the friendliness from the outside; the smell of coffee being brewed by one of the employees currently on duty; the _terrible_ sandwiches and other foods- everything. How nostalgic to that of my mother, how kind she was. She might've worked herself too hard, to death that is, but even so she was as kind as a mother could get... always caring for me no matter how much stress she had. She would help me and I would help her, like the people who work here at Anteiku with each other and as well as customers that requested their assistance.

I entered. Ever so graciously I was welcomed by those who were working- Enji-san, Nishiki-san (for whatever reason he was here this early), the Manager, and I could see the suspicious character Yomo-san in the back attending to something.

I went into the back to greet the others. "Kaneki-kun? What brings you here? I thought you two weren't supposed to leave for your date 'till later," Enji-san asked.

"E-eh? We're not on a date, Kouma-kun... and I got up a bit too early than I should have so I just decided to come here, that's all," I explained to the former Devil Ape leader. "So, uh, is there anything I can help with?" I asked.

Nishiki-san came in the room at that moment and proceeded to aggressively attack me. "Hey, hey. You're not helping today. I'm getting 1.5 times my pay if I can do half of this myself. That 1.5 times the pay isn't money it's just a package every 5 ours of overtime."

Souka, souka... Nishiki-san needs to eat but he doesn't want to use Kimi-san or go hunting. "Okay, okay."

"I guess I'll go see Touka-chan, I guess..." I said with disappointment as I headed upstairs. Of course Enji-kun isn't going to let me leave without saying some sort of remark.

"Good luck, Kaneki-kun!" What an annoyance, but he is that sort of brotherly guy. I'm sure he's just joking... or teasing- same thing, I think. I hardly understand the difference.

Stairs- difficult. Why? Not paying attention (almost tripped). Too caught up in thoughts? No, just dosing off into Neverland once again.

Room. Touka-chan's room. I don't think I've been in here- wait, she's been in my house... unfair. Might I be a little kid? Eheh, maybe in movement and in spoken thought, but subconsciously I'm more serious, well, in a way. Time to muster up my strength- not to have the guts to open the door, but to protect my guts _from_ the door... or maybe a hand. It doesn't matter which one, it'll still hurt like hell. Super Saiyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan! It didn't work.'

I knocked on the door. Be ready, I might have awoken the Sleeping Giant... nothing came **[2]**. Surprising. I knocked again. And then again. Was she not here? Did Enji-kun leave me to figure that out myself for not asking if she was currently available? No. Touka-chan's probably asleep, right? Wait, she's responsible... at the very least she seems responsible. Hmm, maybe she's just tired?

"Touka-chan, if you don't answer the door I'm going to open it and come in," I said, assuming that the piece of wood in front of me was indeed unlocked.

No one answered. I suppose it's time to let myself in. I've already seen the poor girl cry, entering without permission is probably not as bad... what am I saying, it is. The act is already committed, however.

"Ano... you here?" I asked. No one answered once again.

Instead of an emptiness, however, I could hear the scribbling of a pencil and taps of something _somewhere_. What might that be? Of course, it's probably that black-haired witch, but what is it she's doing instead of answering my calling?

Creeping around the corner. Jeepers **.[1]** A wild Touka-chan appeared. **[3]** She wasn't looking this way. Instead she was facing the wall opposite of where I came from and was looking at a small desk she was sitting on. Headphones surrounded the "ears" she had (which were usually hidden by her hair). She was concentrating, but on what?

Before I proceed further, it is mandatory that I pray. If I am to die today, a virgin, then it best be with God's blessing. Praying done, I proceeded to slowly walk towards Touka-chan to see what she was doing. Oh? Studying. That's right... she's in school as well- but this is some pretty hard stuff she's trying for. And she's missing quite a few of the questions. Should I risk my discovery and help her? Risk my discovery? That's an understatement. Should I give up this secret operation and help Touka-chan study? Hmm... what can I achieve out of this? A beating, an apology and veneration- I would say that helping the girl is worth it. Then that is what I shall do.

I tapped her shoulder lightly- this wasn't to try and not scare her, this was merely me showing that I don't want to hurt her. Or, more accurately, I myself don't want to get her. Twas such an act all in vain? Indeed it was.

The girl jumped, did some crazy Russian acrobatics that I've never seen in any Japanese person before, grabbed my neck and pushed me onto the wall! Touka-chan! Don't break the neck please! "O... ohayou... Touka-chan," I said as I was being choked by the ferocious grip the female had on me. "C- could you please, let go?"

"Ken!?" A surprised woman asked me. She let go of my neck and hit me on the head. "The hell you trying to do, die!? And why are you in my room without-"

Of course this girl, when in panic an frustration, didn't use common sense too well. "I knocked three or so times," I paused to cough a bit and clear my poor throat. "And you didn't answer. I-I'm sorry, please spare my life!"

"Then what's with tapping my shoulder like a molester?" The girl asked me.

"Eh... sorry?"

In a solemn manner, she sighed. Might I have done something wrong, other than entering without permission and entering personal space? It's not like she hasn't done it to me, so what's the difference between then and now?

"What do you want, Ken?" She then interrogated me. It might seem like a bit much to say "interrogated," but believe me, this was a serious matter of MY life and death.

"Well I ready too early and didn't feel like wasting the day, so I came here, and then Enji-kun and the others said that they didn't need help, so I asked if you were here, I then came up here, no one responded and I cam in," I, without too much detail about my encounter with Kouma-kun, explained.

Touka-chan's visualization of me must have dropped into a lower life form as she irritably looked at me. "I mean, why'd you tap my shoulder, dumbass," she clarified.

Oh. That. "I-I just wanted to help you with your... studying," I assumed what she was doing.

"Huh? Why?"

Reasons- I don't really have any of those. Wait, yes I do! "Because I'm obligated to help my friends and acquaintances, and I noticed you've gotten a few wrong, so I suspected you might appreciate some help."

"Are you calling me stupid?"

"No, no. I'm just being nice... is all."

I don't think she was mad at my response. "Fine, it'll benefit me, so go ahead, smart ass."

Oh? First I'm a dumbass, now I'm a smartass- I guess it's better than the former.

I spent the rest of the time we had until we had to go teaching her things she didn't know or misunderstood.

Classic literature was her downfall, she told me. I guess that's a coincidence since I'm majoring in Japanese literature. Every other subject she was either decent or well-versed with.

It was fun to teach, I can't lie.

"Ken, maybe you should become a teacher," Touka-chan stated.

A teacher? Really? I rubbed my head. "It might be fun to teach, but I don't think I could work with so many people..."

"You work well here in Anteiku, even if your coffee sucks..." You didn't have to add that last part. "And you taught me fine, hopefully." Excuse me, Touka-chan, could you not doubt me so bluntly? But for being a good student, I'll let it slide.

"I think we should get going now- wait, do you need to get ready?"

"Yes. But I'm not letting you stay in here while I shower, who knows what you'd do in here," she elucidated. Am I that untrustworthy?

I sighed. There was nothing I could do when Touka-chan was set on something like that. Maybe if I tried hard enough, but then again, that'd make me sound like a pervert- what guy begs to stay in a girl's room? "Fine, fine. I'll wait downstairs."

"Thanks."

Within moments I was shoved out of the room by a monster with a smile on its face. Superb. Guess I should go see what everyone's up to then.

* * *

 **1: General Yamamoto told the Japanese leaders that they had "awoken the Sleeping Giant" after they attacked the US. We did end up crushing the Japanese during the war, and in this case, Touka would crush Kaneki. To any Japanese readers, no offense, it's fact. That sounds harsh... whatever.**

 **2\. Jeepers Creepers word-play thing. Idk.**

 **3\. Pokemon**

 **Sorry for the short chapter. I usually post every two weeks to get 3-4K words, I only got 2.2K done in the week I was given but, hey, I'm doing this for fun.**


	10. The Mask of Hell

**How does another Tokyo Ghoul story along with this one sound? The difference from that "new" one to this one would be that the "new" one would be steampunk based. I don't know if anyone else has come up with a steampunk Tokyo Ghoul idea (they probably have), but I like the design.**

* * *

Touka-chan and I arrived where Tsukiyama-san had wanted to meet me. He was waiting outside. It was a restaurant- it seems I was misinformed, or rather, I misinterpreted. He was dressed quite nicely as well, and he had a sort of butler waiting there as well. We walked up to him and he greeted us politely.

"Welcome, Kaneki-kun! I was not expecting you to bring Touka-chan, but it is not a problem! It is only natural for a man to want to bring his future wife to such a magnifique restaurant," Tsukiyama-san said. I'm not particularly happy about the 'future wife' part, but I can let Touka-chan handle punishment.

She immediately did as I had predicted. "Don't make up things, bastard." When fighting, being an Ukaku-type ghoul, she was very unpredictable and relied mostly on fast attacks- but you could probably pinpoint exactly what she was going to say whenever you insulted her or got on her nerves.

"Yes, yes, my dear Touka. Allow me to escort you to the waiting room as the chefs prepare everything," the male ghoul said as he led us into the restaurant. It was very nice with a variety of paintings and expensive looking things. The floor was a dark brown color with a red-whine colored carpet on top of it. The crevices of the walls and the ceiling and the floor were a color of gold with patterns on them. The quality of the exorbitantly expensive items was consistent throughout the rest of the restaurant, no doubt from donations, patrons and Tsukiyama-san's love with spicing things up.

We reached the waiting room within a few seconds. It was well decorated like that of a family room in a mansion, and it kept the theme of colors that the hallway and entrance had. "Please wait here, we will be with you shortly," the, I'm assuming, butler said as he closed the doors and headed off to prepare. Once again, assuming.

"He didn't ask us to shower... so that's a good sign, at least," Touka-chan said.

"S-shower? What do you mean?" I questioned why she said anything about showering.

We sat down, each on our own couch, as she answered my inquiry, "When I first met him, he invited me here too. He asked me to shower and then tried to eat me with his flock of disgusting ghouls."

Did- did he just say _eat_ her? As in, cannibalism? Tsukiyama-san... did that? "Why would he do something like that?"

"He likes things that are different and enjoys extravagant things- as long as it's fun that piece of shit is bound to be interested."

I- I see... so he likes to things to stimulate himself... I can't really get mad at him though, it's not like I fully understand this ghoul and human business. Maybe if I witnessed it first hand I might get angry but, right now, I can just see Tsukiyama-san's hobbies as strange things he does.

"Can't you just forgive him? Nishio-san tried to kill me when we first met, but we're fine now," I tried to get her opinion on the matter.

"Because he's a gourmet and the things he does are nauseating."

Wow. Touka-chan must really hate him. But then again, she hates a lot of people...

I need something else to talk about or this'll get really awkward... um... think Kaneki... "So how'd it go with Yoriko-san?" Damn it Kaneki, that'll just make this even more awkward... ever since we met Yoriko and Hide at the mall... I really am an idiot.

She sighed in discontent. Touka-chan proceeded to wrap her arms around herself and pretended to shiver. "She wouldn't stop talking about cooking techniques, Valentine's Day, White Day **[1]** and all sorts of other things... thank you, Ken, I've learned a lot of useless things I'll definitely need to know later on." Her sarcasm was killing me on the inside.

"I give you my condolences; Hide wasn't nearly as bad. He just grinned to me and said 'Have fun' and then ran off."

Touka-chan chuckled. Her laugh was bewitching. It might be the first time I've heard her do something like that. Recently, I've been getting to know this girl a lot more- her sadistic-like side and her adorable side. Really, this is like a drama featuring overdramatic Latin American actors **[2]**.

"Still... I was surprised to see Yoriko with him..."

I was also surprised to see him with Touka-chan's friend. "Some people might say opposites attract... but I think same sides can too."

Touka-chan coyly glanced to me. "You're weaker than all hell... but you're too... how can I make an argument against that? "

Nani? Nani? Did I do something wrong?

The black haired girl seemed uncomfortable being in this house with her arch enemy... if that's what she'd call him. No, she'd call him "bastard." But to someone like me, that'd just be like the main antagonist of her life. She seemed so out of it and queasy being in here. I don't really understand that though, it's a very nice place... maybe that's the reason?

I decided to get up to try and "comfort" her. It's a try, so this'll either end up well, or it'll be another Chernobyl. Moving my legs closer the girl was hard enough when you get a sense of uneasiness from her and you can feel death waiting around the corner and watching his magic time watch. The girl moved her head to look into my eyes as I stood above her with her one eye.

It seemed that she was perplexed as to my being here. "Wha-"

I gave her a small pat. She didn't glare or yell- a good sign. "It's okay- we're here together, you can rely on me."

It's not very convincing when someone like me says you can rely on them, but it's the most I can do to make Touka-chan feel better. "Hai, hai- your niceness will get the best of you sometime."

"Maybe. You know, you're quite simpatico," I told her.

"Simpatico?"

I turned around and headed back to my own couch. "It's a compliment." She eyed me looking for any lies that I had just told (of which there were none, calm down; you're too overactive. Why am I always getting judged and criticized by you? It's like the same thing all the time.)

She didn't find anything wrong with my response in the end. We waited in silence for the remainder of the time until the same guy came back to get us.

"This way, if you'd please follow me," he said. We did as he had asked and he lead us to a room where Tsukiyama-san was waiting with a sophisticated looking outfit on.

"Goodness, please excuse that I forgot to ask you to wear something nice- but no matter, we're here now, and that is all that matters. Please, sit," he said. The table was round so the three of us could sit an equal distance from each other.

The two of us sat down. It was only then that I remembered something. This was a restaurant... and the owner was a ghoul... and we were all ghouls here- I'm not human... I'm idiotic coming here without even understanding that. If we're going to eat, it's going to be humans- haha, I don't want to though. It's that I hate the taste, it's the guilt that I've eaten my own kind. Or maybe it'll be cannibalism- maybe I could go through with that, if I were to eat a murderer, but I have no idea how cannibalism with ghouls work and the taste might be like a dirty rag or old mayonnaise. It's not like I know. Maybe it didn't matter if it was human or ghoul- I'm half and half. I belong in both worlds. Either way it would be cannibalism, but maybe it's possible to think of it like just eating. I'm neither one or the others, I'm both, so I can't look at everyone as if I'm one of them. Doesn't that give me an obligation to see them all as food? No! Don't say that Kaneki, that's... too cruel for your personality.

We talked some- mostly me and Tsukiyama-san. Touka-chan just sat there and watched our interactions for most of the time unless the French accented man insulted or teased her. It might be plausible for them to get along if they tried. Kind of like Touka-chan and me. We were once on a one-sided, friendly relation, but now Touka-chan trusts me enough that I can talk to her normally.

A waiter came in after a quarter of an hour of us talking and brought meat. It reminded me of my favorite hamburgers- the patties of those burgers. I loved those with a passion, and now that I'm a ghoul, the same goes for human meat. It took a lot of strength to not go crazy and start devouring the scrumptious looking plate of food put in front of me.

"Well, prendre Plaisir," Tsukiyama-said as he put a handkerchief in his shirt.

The way he touched the fork and knife were that of high class. The graceful posture he sat and kept himself in was on another level from us commoners.

Should I try to copy and eat like him? Sure, I'll try to learn.

I took the knife and fork and tried to do the same. It must have looked awkward. Touka-chan, on the other hand, also struggled to eat like him. We were both fakes in a world of class.

I took a bite of my meal. Its taste was much different from the first time I ate meat and the other times... the flavor was just... different. I'm not sure why but it was so much better than any other thing I think I've had in my life as a ghoul.

Touka-chan and Tsukiyama-san too seemed to be in bliss.

It was as if we were too caught up in the meat than each other, so we didn't really talk much during that time of our dinner.

"So, how was it, my dear guests?"

"It was amazing!" I complimented him. "How did you get this flavor? You couldn't have put fruits or other meats- that's poisonous to us..."

"It was the work of my magnificent chef- I cannot reveal his secrets, but the fact that you enjoyed the meal- tres bien!"

Touka-chan didn't give feedback. When Tsukiyama-san smiled at her, but her reaction was making a 'Tch' sounds and moving closer to me. At the very least she likes me enough to do that... that's... that's an accomplishment... yes. I say that all the time, but it really is a big feat for me- especially me.

"Well then, friends- welcome to the show. I do hope you don't mind being today's entertainment!"

* * *

1\. White Day happens one month after Valentine's Day. Look it up to find out more.

2\. I unfortunately have to watch Colombian and Mexican shows because my Mexican mom likes them, and they're so OVER EXAGGERATING.

 **No more posting schedule. No more 3K words a story. Sorry lol, I forget to write most of the time, so I'll just post whenever I can.**


	11. Feral to the World

T-Today's... entertainment? What is Tsukiyama-san talking about? Are we going t-to dance for him or something?

I soon figured out I was completely wrong. The walls started to shake and I could feel gravity working against us as the room seemed to head in an upwards direction. Tsukiyama-san put on a mask, and the moment we were in an arena-like field, he jumped high into the air and landed on a second story before jumping onto the third.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I present two fine ghouls. One is a beautiful and charming young lady who stole my heart at one time, and another is a man who's main interest is books. Many might be thinking that this, cannibalism, is very putrid, but I assure you all that they are TRES BIEN!" He exclaimed into a microphone.

All around us were other ghouls, I presumed. They all had masks so I had to assume the most plausible theory. Eyes watched over us in observation of muscles, the look on our faces, our reactions- everything. Some seemed disgusted, others seemed in an ecstatic mood.

Does he plan to feed us to them?

"Should our two contestants win against our scavengers, I shall grant them freedom," Tsukiyama-san went on.

The sounds of disappointment echoed throughout the "restaurant."

"Fret not, I have another meal prepared in case of that event- either way, your meal shall be... exqùisite."

The crowd calmed down when the Frenchman said his final sentence. He passed the microphone to another man who introduced us to our first, and possibly final, opponent. I looked at Touka-chan who had an expression of worry and hatred.

As the man went on to say something about a "Mrs. M" or another name, I tapped Touka-chan's shoulders. She reacted rather harshly and turned abruptly to face the person who dared touch her. It seems I was wrong. I am, if only slightly, taller than the girl. I put my hand on her head and rubbed it gently. Whether the idea of her killing me for doing something _odd_ such as that act I had just performed was not a worry of mine at the moment. Now, at this time, my focus was more directed to keeping her as relaxed as possible and to try and keep us alive. A big man came from a big door. He seemed overly obese in every way and had seemingly no eyes. Blood covered his face and he held a giant, sharp object of which I presume he is going to use to try and cut us.

Wait... I forgot to take out my mask from my pocket earlier. Touka-chan and the others instructed that I keep it with me at all times in case of emergency, and I was not expecting this turn of events and was going to take it out but my mind seems to have gone elsewhere during that time.

I took it out and put it on. Touka-chan also had hers and she put it on. They already saw our faces, but that's okay- through the crowd and people it's doubtful they'll even be able to remember our (un-ghoul-ified) eye color or even certain features on our faces.

The audience members took sides betting. Most went for the gigantic lump of meat that stood before us, however, some went for me, Touka-chan or both of us. Maybe one of us would die- that might be what they were betting on when choosing between me and Touka-chan.

Why would they pick us? For certain, the girl to my left was already in a fighting stance representing her professionalism in fighting, prompting others to think she would win. Her mask was a bunny, which was not surprising given her tastes, however, I think it didn't affect anyone's hypothesis as to who would win at the end of this. And, of course, the ones who bet on my win did so because of my leather, black mask that was more intimidating than anyone's else's here.

"Go get them for mommy!" I heard a woman from the spectators yell aloud.

With a moment's hesitation, the monstrosity replied with a "Yes momma" and proceeded to attack us. With some of that training with Touka-chan and Yomo, dodging this freak show's attacks were nothing with his insanely slow speed.

The thing decided to target me, and I lead him around what I could avoid his attacks that seemed to be getting faster. Touka-chan slipped away and proceeded to attack from his rear. She tried to pierce through the lump of fat known as his "neck" but missed and ended up cutting through his shoulder.

In a fury of pain, he thrashed around violently and threw the object into his hands that hit me. It sent me flying, however, no damage was done to my body.

The woman yelled out again this time in a more angry tone trying to encourage the beast to finish us, however, she'd need to reverse our current roles in order to do so.

With his next swing towards Touka-chan, she easily backed off, surrounded him and impaled him once again- this time through a vital organ the size of a brain, which was his heart. Everything about him was supersized.

He died instantly. Touka-chan instantaneously took her hand from the blubber and mess that he was and shook her hand off from the repulsive blood that was on it.

The people hated our performance because of its inconsistency, its messy action and apparently being too anti-climactic. It's not like I care about these terrifying ghoul's preferences and what they like.

The man on the microphone concluded that his meat would be served, grilled and prepared the freshest and it would look seemingly unrecognizable from its current appearance. What a horrible way to die... eaten by the hands of your own captors. The poor man probably had Stockholm syndrome and was connected to the woman who kept yelling out to him.

The one thing that I found weirdest was my sense of bravery. I had the courage and confidence to stand tall and mighty right now, and it's because Touka-chan's here... and I want to make sure she lives. What happened to Hinami-chan and her mother... I won't let that happen to anyone I know. That's what I promised myself! And in order to keep that promise, I have to stand as high as I can and fight however I can.

The man on the third story then introduced the next person that was to fight us. How revolting. Patches of hair missing, an insane look on his face, dirt all over his clothes and body, the smell of death looming around him- what was he? Human or ghoul? I couldn't tell. Either way, this white-haired thing was an exclusively horrid sight to bare witness to.

Before the announcer could finish explaining who this was and who he belonged to, he attacked. Very quickly he attacked, and very quickly Touka-chan countered. She, however, was cut.

The thing held what was known as a quinque. A device used to kill ghouls and is made from ghouls. The Manager explained these to me, so I should avoid this at all costs.

The two duked it out with repeated blows back and forth, but neither of them cutting or scraping the other with enough force to move them or make them feel a sense of danger.

I ran to the side of Touka-chan and moved in to attack it. I punched, but I was, in a sense, very slow and sloppy. He avoided with no problem.

The quinque, a small knife variant, plunged into my side.

It hurt... IT HURT! This thing... this tiny thing hurt more than that monsters gigantic sword... it's flawed logic, but it hurts! IT HURTS SO MUCH! BEING STABBED IS THE WORST FEELING.

I crumpled up into a ball, and those who placed their bets on me immediately regretted their decision. I'm nothing but a weakling...

I held my side as I saw blood spout and trickle out. It was already slowly healing, but that didn't stop the pain. Even if there's a sense of immortality when getting stabbed, you don't want to get stabbed because the pain is unbearable.

As the possible human was about to finish me off, Touka-chan broke his neck. He was too arrogant, or maybe there was too much blood lust in his eyes- either way, it resulted in being the death of him.

Touka-chan tried to persuade me to get up, but I refused to do so. I stayed there thinking about the events so far. Tsukiyama... that bastard. I can understand my friend's hate for him now. He's disgusting. He doesn't deserve an honorific in the name of Japanese disrespect.

"My, my! How fascinating and entertaining!" Tsukiyama said into the mic watching with an observant posture. "It'll be even more exquisite cooking such well-done meat! Now then, let us bring out _u_ _n_ _de nos chefs_."

Chef. Chef? Cook. Chefs cook. Chefs cook meat. This is a restaurant. Chefs work at restaurants. A ghoul restaurant. A ghoul chef. Even an insane, cannibalizing human couldn't live with these creatures. If it's a ghoul chef, then that means it's a ghoul. I know that, so why repeat it? Because ghouls are strong. Touka-chan isn't at her best right now, and I can barely help.

The door opened, letting in a man wearing a mask that had a painted smile made of an arm. _Intimidating. Scary._ That's what he was.

"Hello, bunny rabbit. For the first time, I'll get to cook human food it seems, in a technicality."

"You're not cooking anything you scumbag!" Touka-chan replied as she ignorantly advanced in an attack.

IDIOT! You're advancing without knowing your enemy! What do you hope to accomplish, Touka-chan! Damn it. Damn it. Damn it all! Heal faster! Get up! My body won't listen!

Touka-chan was lunging towards the ghoul. She was a meter from getting to him when he unleashed his kagune, sending her body flying to the other side. It hit her on the left. Taking a look at his kagune, it was like Tsukiyama's, except with small spikes all around it. It must have hurt Touka-chan.

"Touka-chan!" I cried out to her. She got up as if she were inhuman. I could see her shaking some from the force of the hit, and possibly from fear.

She also unleashed her kagune. A beautiful wing that looked like a lit fire. Ferocious and beautiful. It fit Touka-chan perfectly. With her kagune, she went in for another try- another attack. The space we were in was quite open, but she found a way to hope from column to column at amazing speeds before deciding to surprise the enemy.

Within a foot of hitting him, this time, the same thing happened, this time harder.

"Ignorant fool. Do you think I'm so inexperienced that I'd lose to such a plain trick? That's the primitive attack of an Ukaku ghoul," he said in a calm voice.

Passively, he walked over to the girl's body and kicked her a few feet back once again.

"Finish her!" "Aye!" "We need some good food!" "I will pay a big some for her lower half..!"

Sick... sick. Sick! SICK! SICK.

The chef picked her up with one hand and held her up to the audience. They cheered wildly.

He was mocking me. He was showing me that was how I was going to end up. He was showing me that the person stronger than me couldn't even beat him. That's okay now... it's cliché, I know. Your friend is in trouble and you suddenly gain almighty power and motivation.

But that's not the case. I've always had power, I just didn't have the skill to use it... and I've always been motivated. It's just that this agitates me.

With the roar of a lion, I stood up and leaped at the ghoul chef. I could feel something on my back, almost as if it were another limb.

"A Rinkaku?" I heard him mumble to himself.

He threw Touka-chan's almost unconscious body to the side and waited to counter me like he did to her. I'm not that level of retarded, I'M EVEN MORE RETARDED.

His kagune hit me. It hurt. It was like sleeping on a bed of nails, but that didn't stop me. For Touka-chan. FOR TOUKA-CHAN I MUST.

Before he could send me into the air, I latched onto his kagune. The spikes of, of course, hurt like hell, but this was the only way for someone like me to win. I could feel the surprise from him. Bleeding from my arms, I tried to once again lunge at him, but my arms and legs didn't move, instead it was the fifth, no, fifth through eight limbs that were on my back. They came crashing down on his body as he tried to protect himself. I pierced his chest. He fell backward and I let go. Quickly, I unzipped my mask and jumped on him. As he tried to ask for mercy and kick me away, I bit into his neck. My kagune ripped through vital organs at the same time. A calm person is ready for anything but the expected- they're calm because they expect the expected. Give them the unexpected and they can't react fast enough. Simple.

The crowd watched in silence as I got up from the chef's dead body. It must have surprised them too, that someone like me had killed one of their chefs in one of the most idiotic ways possible.

It's not like I care about them anyways.

Tsukiyama started to clap. "I was not expecting that Kaneki-kun... indeed, you are very special. Might I request you become one of our pat-"

"Don't kid yourself!" I yelled at him. I slowly turned my head towards him on the second top floor. I stared him down with the one eye that wasn't covered by the eyepatch. It wasn't like me to get mad like that, but I felt that it was a duty of mine. "I'm sick of this. I thought you were okay... but it turns out you were just like how Touka-chan said you were."

He dropped down and started walking towards me. "Now, now Kaneki-kun, it was all for fun."

"So hurting others if fun?"

"I would've interfered had any-"

"Don't give me that crap! Take another step and I'll kill you!"

He smiled. "Kill me? I don't think you could!" He shouted as he swiftly approached me. It was a bluff. I can't fight a head on battle with Tsukiyama- I don't know anything about his fighting style or kagune.

As fast as I could I picked Touka up and ran to the other side of the auditorium-like room.

"Let them go!" Tsukiyama said aloud for all to hear.

People questioned him, but they did as he said. We were allowed to leave. I walked out eyeing everyone to be ready if anyone pulled any sort of surprise attack. No one did. The second I got outside, I started running. I didn't care about our masks or how dirty and bloody we looked. I didn't care if there was a CCG investigator somewhere. All I needed to do right now was get to Anteiku. It's been about an hour since we met up with Tsukiyama and it was dusk. I ran as fast as I could. I did so because Touka-chan needed medical attention.

I reached Anteiku finally, after what seemed like hours, but was only a few minutes.

By this time Anteiku was closed, and with my speed, I doubt anyone saw anything abnormal with me and the girl I was carrying. I knocked on the door as soon as I reached it. I could hear people's voices inside. The only voice I didn't hear inside was Yomo's, but the rest of Anteiku's employees were there.

"Oh that must be those two l-" I heard Enji-kun say as he opened the door. He stopped mid sentence as he saw the both of us.

I took my mask off half of the way, and it was dangling from one side. Tears were coming down my face and it looked like I had been through hell. Touka-chan's limp body in my hand and everything around stained in blood. The red substance in my mouth made me feel like a monster, but there was nothing I could do about it right now.

"Tasukete."

 **BLACK SCENE**

* * *

 **An update. Your're welcome.**


	12. White Carnation: Innocence

**Dialogue. Original. Arc? Yes.**

* * *

Seven. Time. Inconsistent. Long? Why. Bastard! Die! Live? Cry. Bodies. Run! Stop. No. Feel. Dark outside... yes, alone. Always alone...

"Kaneki-kun."

Who? The Manger... "Yes?"

He, even through the hardships of life, continued to look stern. "Touka-chan will be okay," he said. "She should stay in bed for a week if she wants to heal faster, so I'm giving her shift to our new employee Roma."

A week? Her wounds weren't that bad were they... no, she's been eating Yoriko's food, and thus she can't heal properly. Touka-chan... idiot. Wait, that means... no, I won't let that happen. I refuse.

I recently started to re-attend Kamii University. I don't have an excuse to skip, but I suppose I could come after.

Touka-chan is studying to get into a good school. If she misses out for a week, especially during this time, it could affect her future. Not just her future, her life, her personality- people, ghouls and humans, are fragile that way. I cannot allow Touka-chan to fail! I must compensate for what I have done! I am the reason this happened to her... I need to help her any way I can... because she isn't my friend, she's something like a family members. Everyone here is, but I owe the most to this girl. She's kept me sane, I might say. When I was about to go crazy of hungry, she helped me, even though she didn't want to; she's helped me stay me. Even though she hated me at first, look at how we get along now- just fine. I will not let her fail! I will not fail her! She can't fail me!

"Yoshimura-san!" I called out. I bowed in the most polite and respectable manner I could. "Allow me to help Touka-chan while she's out of school!"

I couldn't see his face or his reaction. I could only hear his and my soft breathing. "You don't need permission to help someone in need, Kaneki-kun," he responded. I looked up to his smile. "Anteiku may not help with personal problems, but that cannot stop our individuals from acting alone to help others in need."

The Manager uses a loophole? I see... I see.

"Thank you for the wisdom, sir."

"Wisdom? It's merely life."

That's ironic.

I headed upstairs to see Touka-chan without hesitation, almost as if my body was forcing me to head in her direction. As I seemingly shot past the Manager, I could feel a warm aura come off of him. I don't understand why when this was, a little while ago when the others were here, a state of peril. But maybe that too is "life." Remembering the sadness in life to find the happiness that is in the sadness. Here, the happiness is that our poster girl is alive.

Here's the door. I knocked. No one responded. Should I just go in? I knocked once more to make sure. Once again, there was no response.

Carefully, I opened the door as to make sure to not make any sound. I took of my shoes at the entrance and walked to Touka-chan who was lying on a bed.

Peaceful- her eyes closed; the soft breathing sound; gentle muscle contractions of the lungs and diaphragm; a body that sat still in repose and a mental state of probable equanimity.

There was a chair in the other room where she studied, so I grabbed it and slowly set it down as to make sure to not make any noise. Sitting in it was hard without a book. Normally, I'd wait while reading and letting my mind escape the ferocity that is life and its cruelty, in this case, my friend's pain- that's what held me back. My book isn't as important as this girl. Sure I have to pass the time somehow, but it's not like I brought a book with me...

Maybe pain was a little too much of a descriptive word. For Touka-chan, it was more of a challenge. She didn't seem to be in any discomfort, but I'm certain that she was on the inside. For all I know, her emotions are beating up her psyche for not being able to beat that bastard "chef" and Tsukiyama. I don't know what it is she thinks, I can only guess what she thinks

This girl never stops confusing me. Usually while I'm working, she'll scrutinize and complain to me through whispers and mumbles to make sure the customers aren't distressed, and then now just looking at here makes all that go away. It's as if she were a pure maiden; sleeping soundly as if she had never done anything wrong... she will be the death of me.

In a fight, she could get hurt, and in that fight I would protect her should she start losing. I would put myself in harm's way to try and at least feel what it is she's going through... to try and save her. Being the devil she is, she'd criticize me for doing something idiotic, but I can't let the Touka-chan I know die... she can hit me all she wants, but she and the others, I would to everything for.

I see... Hide... so this is...

Thank you, Touka. Remember when you forced me to eat? When I thought about regretting it for the rest of my life? Maybe it isn't so bad... I can see the white carnations in this field of flowers, Touka.

 **[BLACK SCENE]**

* * *

 **Praise your god, me.**


	13. Gray Dandelion: Connection

It was bright and early, the sun had just come up. Waking up I found myself in an uncomfortable position on a bed but... it didn't feel like mine. And the arm over me certainly wasn't mine for I hadn't the athletics to perform such a feat, and even then I don't think I have three upper body limbs.

Bright- it was, it really was. Who opened the curtains? Who dare interrupt my sleep? The only person capable, I thought, would be my mother. Caressing my cheek as I lay down and speaking the kindest of words- my image of her. Her face was beautiful, to say the least. Her smile was angelic. A true mother. One that loved without a fault, who worked for you and accepted, humbly, the kindness that you returned. The tears came out of my eyes slowly and I couldn't stop them. How I missed her. Her figure stood in front of a gleaming and ecstatic light that almost seemed alive as I found myself reaching out to her, calling so that she would come back to me- to comfort me. A selfish desire, but it was the only desire of mine that wasn't selfless- family. Right now I had a family that was charismatic and charming in its own way.

I finally decided to open my eyes. Slowly I opened them to adjust to the light. Finally they were fully open and active. I hadn't fallen asleep in my bed, but rather, I had some of my body laying on a foreign bed and another portion on the ground. That arm draped over me was Touka-chan's. Trying my best not to wake the sleeping girl, I grabbed her hand and pulled it off of me. From there, I proceeded to lay her hand in the same position. She slept soundly throughout this process. Good, good, no need to rush the morning for the wounded girl. Maybe I shouldn't say that... Touka-chan would disapprove of me "looking down" on her.

Stretch. A fantastic experience for a sentient being such as myself. It feels good to stretch. I can say that some of my muscles weren't particularly happy with the position that I was in during sleep. Some ached and felt sore. That will be the most regrettable part of my day. At the very least I should have put my entire body on the bed; then again, Touka-chan... I sighed. There is no way to be comfortable around this girl and not get a stinging sensation from a punch later on in the day.

The way her head was positioned exposed her right eye. I like the look- both eyes uncovered, that is. But a woman will keep her appearance whatever way she wants.

Once again, I stretched and let out a big yawn. I finally stood up and went to the kitchen area to grab a glass of water. It was surprisingly well kept- well, not necessarily surprising, it was just more... unnatural. Average- that's a word for it.

Now where are the cups? I looked in a few cabinets before finding them. I walked to the sink and filled it with water and drank it. How refreshing.

After drinking all of my refreshment, I set the cup down and walked to where she studied. Two textbooks were open and I scanned the contents carefully. I wonder where she's going to apply; I should ask her. Having nothing else to do while I waited for Touka-chan to get up, I started to read them. It was boring, I won't lie. I sighed. Should've brought a Sen Takatsuki novel, but I didn't know this was going to happen... oh well. The only thing left to do now is to wait for the Anteiku poster girl.

Three-quarters of an hour passed. Drowsily reading through these things was painful- I'd learned much of this by now, but for some reason, like any college student, reading or watching a lecture about something you already know was tedious and felt like a punishment.

Stop, stop. Ken, stop. Occupy yourself some other way... but what to do? My hand scratched my head. I don't want to mess with her stuff (anymore).

"Hey, pervert, what are you doing?" The girl in bed groaned trying to get up.

"Touka-chan?!" I almost shouted.

She yawned and tried stretching but stopped, probably due to pain from being sore all over. "I caught myself a pervert- why are you here, Ken?"

"Why was your arm wrapped around me?" I retorted. There was a lot of confidence in me today, whether it was for the fact that the black haired girl couldn't torture me or because I didn't care, well I didn't really care.

"You slept here?!" She then cried out.

I sat on the wood chair that was net to the bed. "I made an oath to help you, I'm sorry for intruding, but I just wanted to make sure nothing happened."

I made eye contact with her but she looked away. The rabbit has been trapped! "Thanks..." Touka-chan whispered.

Normally, my move would probably (in a situation where she couldn't get me) be to ask her to speak up, but that would be mean and heartless.

"It's just me trying to repay you... anyways, I heard that you have some stuff for school coming up, and um, I thought that because of your injury, you wouldn't be able to study, so I stayed here to help you study. This is my thanks for being there with me yesterday," I explained.

She sighed. I noticed how her hair reverted back to its normal state (albeit messily). "It's fine... it was the Manager who told me to go to school anyways, I just went because I didn't want to say no. It was fun, but I don't think it matters anymore."

"Touka-chan! I'm going to help you! I've already made that decision myself! Whether or not you like it, I will force you to sit here and study with me!" My subconscious thoughts took over. "I don't want you to fail... I don't care about what promise you made with Mr. Yoshimura, I care about your future! Ghoul or not, I want you to succeed. As your friend... please, let me help you." These eyes of mine started to water. I couldn't hold it back. It wasn't an emotional subject. It wasn't, at least, until I talked about the future. It might be weird, that's understandable. I want to help this girl I've known for a few weeks, a month at most, accomplish and conquer life. I'm ready to devote whatever I can to her. I'm ready to devote myself to my friends, the ones I just recently met, and the one I already knew.

She stared at me with a baffled expression. I can't blame her, a guy's about to burst into tears because she won't study, how much stranger could this get? She gave in, however, and that was all I needed: for her to let me help her. I might've said that I would do it whether she liked it or not, but I'm not that type of guy. Passive- that describes me well.

"Not today, though... I want to go-"

"You're staying in bed for the rest of the week- or at least stay in the room. That's what the Manager insists." I cut her off rather impolitely, but there was nothing more I could do in the situation other than hear her out, but then that'd take more time and explaining.

"Damn..." She mumbled. "So I'm supposed to lay here for the rest of the weak, listen and watch you teach, and do nothing else but be in this room with myself, my things and you. Great."

I thought back for a moment- what else could Touka-chan do? Hmm... I could call Hide, and Hide knows Yoriko! But wait, I don't think Yoriko knows about Touka-chan being a ghoul... however, she's not in her bloodstained clothes, and there's no real evidence of physical harm on her body, just the after affects of the fight. So how about I help her study after I make breakfast, then I can call the blonde enigma and see if he can bring his, I assume, girlfriend and that should make Touka-chan happy, slightly- hopefully.

I went downstairs and got a bit of "breakfast" for Touka-chan. Human meat... even after our battles and the things I've witnessed, this still makes me feel guilty, and my self-awareness tells me it's disgusting.

"Here, some food to rejuvenate."

She took it with open arms and politely (cutely) thanked me.

I let her eat in privacy, otherwise it'd be rude, I learned from he Manager. Even without his advice, I most likely wouldn't watch her eat anyways. It looked cannibalistic to me, sort of, but at the very least, I could tolerate eating human meat now. That's a ghoul's curse. Maybe it's not a curse to them, but being both, I understand the pain and suffering. I understand the things they're probably missing out on.

I returned and threw away what was left. For the next three hours I studied with her. She was happy, I know that. Even though our feisty Touka-chan said she didn't care, she was trying hard to understand, comprehend, remember- that's what Touka-chan did best with these sort of things.

A knock was heard at the door. Good, it must be them. I opened the door that revealed an enigmatic blond with a light haired girl that gave off the same presence as the man.

"Hide, Yoriko-chan."

"Hello, is Touka awake?" Touka-chan's friend asked.

I nodded yes as the two took off their shoes and came in.

"TOUKA-CHAN!" The hazelnut hair colored girl yelled in excitement.

The girl of subject responded with a very surprised turn of the head. Instantly she recognized the short haired girl and yelled back her name, "YORIKO!"

Yoriko-chan and Touka-chan hugged for a moment before the former bombarded the poor Anteiku employee with questions about how she was, what happened and when she'd be better.

Hide and I smiled while overlooking the two friend's interactions.

"Sometimes I'm almost certain a best friend will be closer than a special relationship status," I conveyed my thoughts to him.

He nodded with a grin. "So did you do anything with her? Hmmm? Any progress? Hmmm?"

Of course- this was bound to happen. By the law of the universe, any Hide in existence will intrude on your relationships and feelings because A, they care, or B, it's fun. Or C, both.

"Nothing is going on between us. That idea is about as far-fetched as Hajime Isayama not killing off a character."

He seemed to understand the analogy. As always, the most he'll read that isn't school or work related is manga, comics and things like that.

"So what happened?" He asked in a hushed voice.

"A backstabbing liar..." I vaguely responded gritting my teeth.

The blond put his arm on my shoulder. "It must be hard... so, share your pain with me once in a while."

Share... my pain? How could I do that? I- I can't share my pain with my best friend... I can't- why would I? "What do you mean?"

"Kaneki, you're my best friend, what's so wrong with trying to help you overcome the hardships?" He asked. That's a good point, but this hardship, this obstacle, isn't something for a normal human, much less my friend, to take on.

"There's no point in risking your life."

"Then what about yours?"

"What about mine? I'm just the quiet book worm. I don't have a real purpose."

"Please... don't speak like that... you're all I have right now. I have to rely on you because your my friend, and you have to rely on me. Human or not, we're in this together. All of us- Yoriko, Touka-chan, you and me. The people here at Anteiku, the CCG, regular people- we might seem divided but we're people."

Philosophical Hide... who could have predicted this? "But still... what am I supposed to do as a ghoul and your friend?"

The answer came hard, but it was simple. "Become the connection for both worlds. You might not be the first half-ghoul, but you sure are the first one that understands both."

Of course. But who would listen to a ghoul?

"Yoriko already knows about Touka-chan being a ghoul, but we've decided that she shouldn't know yet," he said with a serious face.

Why? "Why are you-"

"Trust me, Kaneki. We'll do something. We'll do something about all this. For now we just need to overcome the little things."

Hide? What's going on? "But w-"

"I'll tell you when it's time."

When it's time? When will it be time? Hide... you're hiding something. Even after you just said to lean on you, you're bringing something like this up. What the hell is going on anymore... ghouls, humans- I don't understand. CCG.

Commission of Counter Ghouls- the force against ghouls.

Ghouls- inhumane beings that kill and eat people to survive

Humans- the "normal" people of the world.

What do they all have in common? Think... Ken... what is Hide planning...

Not another word about that subject appeared through the rest of the day. Yoriko-chan and Hide left after a few hours, and I asked the Manager for a working schedule, and he gave me evening shifts so that I could have time to spend with Touka-chan to study and so that I could have a little bit of off time.

The answer to my question may never be answered. I might just forget all about it and life will slip under our nose through the crevices of networks that hold secrets. Hide startles me. What can't he tell me about? Why does Yoriko-ch... no, why does Yoriko know? This entire thing will drive me crazy. I don't know what I'm supposed to do.

"Ken."

"Yes, Touka-chan?" I asked what the girl in question needed.

"Firstly, drop the 'chan', it's bugging me having a creep like you say that."

Wait, doesn't she have it backwards? "Y-yes, T-T-Touka, ma'am."

"Why are you stuttering?"

"I don't know ma'am!"

"What the hell is up with ma'am now?!"

I wondered the same thing. "Oh, so what is it you need?

"Could you get a bath ready for me... please?" She politely (amazing) asked with a coy smile.

My hand gave her a thumbs up and I prepared a bath for her to wash up.

Hold up. How is she going to get in _and_ out? If the plan includes me there will be a mission failed and a soldier killed in action.

I came back to find Touka struggling while standing up. I commend the effort she's giving but it doesn't seem to be going anywhere very fast. A slow snail- that's what she was.

"This is painful to watch, need some help?"

"Shut up! I can do this on my own!"

Stubborn as always. Oh well, nothing she can do about it right now, I'm not going to undress and get in with her.

"Here." I put her arm around my shoulder and lifted some to help her ease her way around and into the bathroom. Her cheeks were red throughout the journey, but that's Touka, always thinking help was exasperating.

I left her sitting on a stool near a wall so she could have a bit of support while undressing. Oh. Another thing I didn't think through: what about clothes.

"Touka... um... w-what about uh, clothes?"

"Idiot."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry; don't kill me?"

In the end, we somehow got that managed without too much of a problem. High school girls. Why must they be so hard to deal with? The most complex plan about putting out a shirt and carefully finding the right drawer with shorts JUST to undress from those same shorts to put on a pair of underwear. I can't say I wasn't embarrassed about it too, but there could've been an easier way, right?

* * *

"An explosion in the 20th Ward caught policemen off guard and is said to have killed them instantly. Officers Takai Nagimora, Shinjutso Warui and Minase Ui are the confirmed policeman that were killed. The CCG has announced the immediate deployment of two investigators already in the area to investigate the explosion and hunt down the terrorists who caused it."

A man wearing a hoodie looked around at his peers and subordinates. "Commence Operation Demigod."

The loyal men to him responded in unison and with exhilaration, "YES SIR!"

The members out on their own hoodies that bore an insignia- three spherical objects with insect legs coming out of it on each one. And under that it said a name- an odd name at that, a peculiar name that stood out: CENTIPEDE.

* * *

 **Plot twist**

 **I'm a month late or something. I don't care, I write these on a whim and without planning. If you want faster updates or more updates pay me. Or find me more views. Idk, something that makes me look like an egotistical piece of crap.**


	14. Blue Hydrangea: Standing

The irony. The all mighty god of irony who smites us. Where was he? What world did he live in? Does he exist? Of course he does, otherwise, how could something like this have happened?

It's funny, really. Touka used to hate me, she used to get annoyed by Hide, and it was like we weren't really important to her. But now, it's like she can't stand not having us around. When I came by her house to help her study, as she lay in bed healing from her injuries, she'd always ask me: why didn't you get here earlier?

I only wish I would've, sometimes. It's not a sad story that's being told right now, it's a happy one. Hide was my only friend all those years ago, and I always thought I only ever needed him (and maybe a girlfriend), but my closeness to this girl was refreshing. It's not saying I don't need the blond, I'd always need him, but as a person, I've matured. So what do I do now? I get closer. I've seen my friends cry, laugh, smile in happiness and some of them have even gotten drunk enough to let multiple cats out of the bag, so what else is there? the world is too small to stop expanding, so when I feel I've reached my peak, what else can I do? As I think about what the Manager told me, about being the bridge between two worlds, I wonder what I could do. I'm a college student at Kamii Univeristy who was once human but is now a half ghoul. What person would believe me? the RC scanners don't work on me, and I can create a a kagune- sure, that's all substantial evidence, but maybe I'm just a "special" ghoul. Rize Kamishiro's organs were put into me, so they have to have that in record at the hospital, right? Wrong. I went to check one day to get a copy of the file, or at least something, but there was nothing. the doctor who performed the surgery apparently didn't exist., and there was no surgery performed that day. Why I was there, they didn't really know. Even though the hospital, Kanou General Hospital, was named after him, he had vanished into nothing. No trace left. So what does that leave me with? Suicide. If I were to announce myself as a ghoul fighting for political rights, I'd be put down immediately.

So what can I do? I don't know right now. Apparently an explosion killed there officers recently, so the area has become enveloped in police officers and CCG personnel. It's not as bad the 3rd and 4th Wards who are practically uninhabited by ghouls because of the fierce CCG presence, but it's forced us to be in a state of extreme caution. We receive CCG customers, and I have to admit that they're nice people, but I can't tell myself to think of them as possible enemies if anything brakes out. Killing isn't something I do... I hate it, it's wrong for me.

Of course I haven't told Touka about what's going on. She's getting better, but we keep her in her room. She might try to kill them, or she could get angry- a lot of things can happen. Personally, I'm doing this for her health. If Touka were to get agitated, it could hurt her mentally, especially after being beat so hard...

I can't be thinking about this right now, I have a job to do, and I can't let anything hinder me from that job.

* * *

"Yoriko... do you think ghouls and humans will ever get to live together?" Asked a young Hideyoshi Nagachika as he looked at the city from the top a building. His arms were leaning on the railing as he stared deeply into the soul and heart of the city.

His girlfriend didn't respond immediately. She took the time to look at her Hideyoshi, and to wonder why he asked what he did. "I... don't know. Why?"

"Because I'm worried... bout Touka-chan and Kaneki," responded the blond.

Yoriko knew how he felt. Of course she worried too, but it was like there was nothing they could do to help the two young ghouls. "I know, but for right now, let's just give them the support they need!" The girls smiled happily as she leaned on the railing next to him.

Hide looked at her face before smiling as well. "Yeah... we might not be the first humans to befriend ghouls knowing their true nature, but we'll certainly be the first to openly accept them."

The girl hugged her partner intimately. Indeed, they were ready to die and fight for their friends. That's what true friends do, even if you don't know much about them.

* * *

I entered Touka's room. It had been about a week and a half before she was finally able to walk normally. I visited and helped her everyday, but I think we talked more than we did study. That's not a problem, however, because she fully understands the concepts I taught to her.

Touka is a hard worker, a very hard worker. At first glance, she's cute and subtle, getting to know her makes her seem reckless, but frankly, she's a normal girl.

The girl was cleaning when I saw her. "You should keep resting,' I told her.

She wasn't startled or surprised by my sudden entrance to her room. "I have to do something, doing nothing just makes me feel... useless."

No, no, Touka, you're not useless. "And why would you be useless?"

"Because I'm not doing anything."

"Touka, I know you like pushing yourself, but couldn't you just leave this part to me?"

Naturally, her response would be 'No, you're a pervert' or something criticizing my lack of muscle, but she unusually made no attempt to put me down. "You can't expect me to lie down all day when I can get up, can you?"

Of course not. That would be silly.

"Can I go see everyone now?"

Yes, everyone visited her. We all encouraged her to heal faster and we all had fun in this little space. But it's not the same when you're not in the working environment that makes living with a family so... familiar and nostalgic. Happiness is what all humans strive for, so it's not natural for the dark haired girl to want to feel as happy as she can be in the most comfortable place.

Work, by most humans, is viewed as laboring and tiring, yet for us, it was what we looked forward to the most. Optimism was the key element to our loving of working each day. The time's we didn't have work were sad and lonely almost, because it's as if everything's fading away, even though it's not.

The CCG presence had died down some since the bombing, but the tension could be felt in the air. He'd have to be wary and watch Touka closely.

"Okay, it looks like you're already dressed so let's go!" I smiled as I took initiative and pulled her by the arm. It was with enough force that she didn't stumble or hurt herself, but I can't say she wasn't surprised at my sudden aggressiveness.

"H-hey wait!"

"Even the customers are sad you aren't here, we have to tell them that you're well from your _illness._ C'mon Touka _-chan_ , let's go cheer them up," I teased her some.

Her face immediately turned into the color of crimson, but that's what I was hoping for. Score one for weakling. It's half time, and I'm still losing by a good 58 points, but that's okay! Why am I having a commentary about a little game I made up?

The Anteiku employees looked at Touka as we came through. "Oh, you feeling better now Touka-chan? Thank Kaneki," Kouma-kun said as he winked and snickered. bad habit Enji Kouma-kun, you'll get me killed.

Some of the customers recognized her and waved, saying something about getting well enough to work soon.

I figure this will motivate her to defy physics and get back to work right now!

Or at least, Hide would say after reading shounen manga.

She smiled and waved back to them. A real smile, not the fakes she gave me. Or are they still fake? I'm having a crisis Touka! It's all your fault Touka!

* * *

"So, why did you do that?" The petite girl asked me as I was making a coffee.

"I just thought it might make you feel better, that's all," I responded to her. I poured a small bit of coffee into a separate cup and drank it. Damn it, not sweet enough- I have to try again.

"What makes you say that?" She follow-up questioned me.

Add a bit of this... good. Perfect coffee... I think. "You seem to enjoy yourself on the floor, so I made your adrenaline spike my abruptly pulling you here in an attempt to recreate the shock that happens when you win something like a million yen."

"..."

"I'm kidding..." I quickly ended the awkward pause "...sort of," I mumbled.

She struggled to speak. "W-well I was fine, uh, with-"

"It's okay, you don't have to say anything," I gave her a quick pat on the head before heading over to deliver this god-like coffee to the waiting customer. As I headed back, I could've sworn that I saw hair fly back. Shy girl. I understand how she feels- I will get praised for my valued and unusual attempts to help her!

If only.

* * *

Ahg. A day's end. Work is good, I said that, I know. But too much work is... tiring. my body slumped on a chair about ten minutes after closing time.

Izumi-san helping the Manager clean up. "Kaneki-kun, what's so tiring, it was a normal day," she said.

"It's Touka... doing two "jobs" at once might be too much for my physically weak body. Even as a ghoul I suffer from this fate," I frowned as I ended the sentence.

"Oh, relationship problems, I see."

"Kouma-kun? You're still here?"

Izumi-san giggled. Good reaction!

"No, no, no relationships here. Just teaching her, and having to deal with all her questions and all- it's fun, but I don't believe I've ever been so socially active in my life," I whole heartedly told Izuma-san.

As I opened my eyes to see her response, I instead got a small piece of wisdom from the Manager. "Then maybe it's helping the both of you in more ways than one."

True, but would talking to her really make me less socially awkward? No, no- Hide is enough proof of that. I'm not as socially awkward as I really believe myself to be, I just put myself down a lot... and I can't really help to do that.

The Manager smiled his smile- a longing for the happiness of others, yet a sadness that affected everyone deeply. Trustworthy- that described him the most. He'd either tell the truth or not say anything at all when it came to secrets and the such... he was a father type figure, yet a friend that we all needed.

I suppose he's right. The Manager is always right. "Mhm."

* * *

The room was well lit today. The sun's rays hit in the goldilocks zone for me. There wasn't too much, and certainly not too little. Beautiful and breathtaking when taking a closer look at it.

Touka was sitting upright in her bed glancing at me every so often as I taught her some concepts. Tomorrow she is supposed to start going back to school. I've successfully completed my objective. Mom... I'm helping people, I'm doing what you always told me.

"That concludes our studying today," I told her as I closed the book I had been holding in front of me.

I glanced at the paper she wrote on. A lot of notes. Honestly, what a hard working girl. As a wife you'd be a keeper for sure.

"Um... Ken?" She asked for me.

"Yes?" I responded.

The black haired girl took a moment to think about her words for a second. "If I need help with anything, ever, can I... um, ask you?"

There's no need to be coy- life isn't all about selfish people. "Of course, turn to me for whatever," I answered her. My legs pushed me upwards as I got up. Grabbing my things, I started to head out and go home for the first time in a few days. It was a pain being here, but a sacrifice I was willing to make for my friend.

Touka told me off as I opened and closed the door behind me. My guilt had been erased- I felt at peace, in a way. I was somewhat hungry, but it was nothing I couldn't handle. I've learned to suppress my hangry emotions and blood thirst after constantly training myself. That wasn't something I needed to tell myself right now, though. Right now, I just have to be happy that I was able to help Touka... kinda like Hide helping me. It's like a Kessler effect, maybe. Helping one person makes them help others and it spreads like a plague. Maybe that's an over exaggeration, no, in fact, it's a big one, but that's what it felt like to me.

I heard the door open as I had just reached the stairs when the door opened and out stormed Touka.

Immediately my mind panicked and went into auto-fly mode. There wasn't enough time to turn around and defend myself for what was the oncoming onslaught, so I just had to take it like a man and fall down these stairs. After helping this woman it was probably habitual to hit and blame me. That's how it went during most encounters with her, but it's alright- she has to lose her steam sometimes... I get it.

I was wrong. Was she compulsively doing this as a thank you? I'm dubious to think otherwise, after all, who'd doubt she'd hit me instead of this gesture? Few people, certainly.

It was a hug. A hug. With emotion. A tight grip around my chest with he bare arms in a short sleeve shirt. Impeccably lovingly she held me as she squeezed herself near me. Her hands shook; her forehead on my back; the tight grip she had. It reminded me of then- when she cried. The first time I'd seen her let loose her emotions. It felt the same but it wasn't. Her voice faltered not and cracked not once as she spoke. She was in a state of euphoria it looked as if.

"I..."

Although she did hesitate, it wasn't out of shyness or anxiety or sadness- it was because of the pondering she did as she spoke.

It'd be a false statement to say she wasn't pressing on me almost intimately, and that my cheeks were flushed. Was it because she was a girl or because it was Touka Kirishima? They burned, my cheeks.

I would've asked what she was doing had Touka not continued her sentence.

"It's not... I'm not doing this becau- just... Ken, thanks for being there... f-for, tch... remember, if you leave me, I'll kill you... I'll need your help in the future so... thanks for everything you've done even though I didn't ask for it..." She stuttered a lot. How cute.

Most of the skin on my cheeks had reverted back to skin color, and I took one of her hands and held it. She wasn't surprised. I'm glad we've progressed this far Touka. To be able to rely on someone, it breaks my heart knowing you can do it... of course it breaks it in a good way. "Unless you're leaving, I'm not leaving."

She might've whispered "thanks" again, but I didn't hear her. Quietly and elegantly she went back to her room and shut the door. What am I supposed to do now? I have all sorts of things and developments going on in my life now...

* * *

C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C.

-you have been hacked by Centipede-

prepare for location tracking and invasion

it won't matter anyways, you'll all be dead soon

see you then, prey

C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C.

"What the fuck is this?" Asked one officer.

"Probably some prank." Said another.

"A prank? This is serious!" The first shouted.

Others looked at the message, some with worry, others without fear.

"They're thinking of attacking a station with three First Class investigators from the Chinese National Ghoul Extermination Unit, the largest in the world, and then send a warning. They're just waiting to get their ass beat if anything."

"We should still prepare, just in case. We don't have the materials needed to half-ass anything."

"I guess you're right. Ask the nearby stations for support in case something goes wrong. This could be the world of humans or ghouls, we'll just have to wait and find out."

"But who's Centipede? I thought Aogiri Tree was the only group capable of doing something major."

"Recently three officers were killed. Centipede claimed responsibility, saying they were trimming the world for 'the King.'"

"What a load of crap."

The officers returned to their duty, while a man looking on his screen in an undisclosed location looked on. "No, we have a duty to uphold, there's not time for 'crap.'"

* * *

 **hi**


	15. Pink Sedum: Affection

Sir. I'd like to inform you that the plan to infiltrate Squad Goliath has failed. It is not due to our own inferiorities or problems, but due to the lack of information provided to us. One of the members, a white haired man, suspected our agent the first time the two met, and he was killed following a conversation with him. I'm requesting the permission to send in a human, rather than a ghoul, to infiltrate them. I understand it's risky, because then ghouls will have been found out to be working with humans, but I believe that even so, it should be permitted. I hear word that activists in America, the European Union and many African countries have already established civil rights groups for ghouls. It is only a matter of time before things escalate. The reason we, Japan, have not heard of any of these situations is due to the fact that we've isolated ourselves as a country in a military affair to exterminate the ghouls. If we could only get out of here, maybe light could be shed on our situation, or maybe it's like this in the rest of the world and I'm only being delusional. Either way, my request has been formally submitted, and I await your reply.

\- Sincerely, The Joker

* * *

Back at Kamii University- ah! I took a long stretch. The class had just been released and most of us were heading to lunch break. Asian History- Hide couldn't survive this class without me. Always whining for me to come when I missed out, really, this guy.

Windy. It was very windy today. I could see the hair on girls blowing about as they tried to keep it under control. The leaves on trees blew away at high speeds, twisting and curving about. It's not as nice as it could be, with a peaceful sun and small breeze, but it helped to cheer me up some. At the very least it wasn't dark, cloudy or raining. Lately has been a journey- not only for myself, but for the people around me. Tiring... it really is, but what can I do except help. After Mrs. Ryouko and her daughter's death, I've been telling myself to help people no matter what, at whatever price it comes. I can never redeem myself for their deaths, but I can at least make them a little happier while they're up their watching us. Helping others... ordinarily I wouldn't do something if it involved danger, but I've changed since then. Now, I have to. Absolution.

Nishiki-senpai was always rough. So when we visited him and caught him at a bad time with his girlfriend (for a second time in a month), he had almost punched us both unconscious.

"Why do you keep interrupting me, Idiot, Idiot Number 2?" He asked us with a stern and powerful look.

"Nishiki you don't have to be so ha-" Hide was hit again, except this time a chop to the head that knocked him back to the floor.

I looked at him with a worried look in my eye. "U-um... maybe you're trying to- to um, do it here so you shouldn't do it here or you'll get spotted more..."

"Wwwwhhhhaaaattt?! Are you telling me what to do?!" His eyes glared towards me with swords rather than daggers.

Terrifying. "N-no... never mind," I said looking away.

"So what did you two come for?"

"Hide needed some supplies for his project and said you had some."

Nishiki-senpai looked around. "What'ya need?"

The two discussed what Hide needed and the older one tried finding some of those things. I walked around and examined the room more. Although I'd been here many times, I've never gotten to take a look at this space. It wasn't messy, nor was it clean- but that's the average college student. A few books laying here and there, some folders and pencils and a laptop stored in a shelf for unknown reasons. Seems like a comfortable place to be in.

Lost in my inspection of the area, I didn't hear Hide call my name until after he had creepily whispered into my ear. Startled, I jolted backwards towards the wall.

"H-Hide, why?"

"You weren't paying attention Kaneki, so it was the perfect opportunity," he responded rather enthusiastically and proud of himself.

Other than being scared for my life for a mere moment, everything went fine afterwards. Nishiki-senpai kicked us out, we got some of Hide's necessities and then went to our own respective houses. I'm not even sure what kind of project he's doing honestly... involving a lot of computer chips and wiring- probably some programming or robotics thing that I know nothing about. But Hide doesn't have a programming or robotics class... best not to think about it, it's his project and he needed to get done what he needs to get done.

* * *

Sometimes I think what the world would be like without ghouls. Rize Kamishiro- she was a sadist, I can tell that much, but I think that was all just a front. Being a strong ghoul that had a well known name, she probably forced herself to change into _that_. On the inside, however, I doubt she wanted that. When she spoke to me she was nice, and there were no indications of violence. It was fun with her, and I think she probably liked it. Remembering back, the two of us walked by Touka and Yoriko-chan as I was "escorting" her. Not wanting to have a bad reputation, I guess she decided to stick with the original plan of eating me.

I want it to be like that. Thinking that it's not true saddens me, and I don't like it. There's no one for me to lean on right now. I've got all these problems to myself because it's just me internally fighting! So I can't let others carry me. I have to stand on my own and hopefully survive the sandstorm that approaches. What else can I do?

In my dreams, it's peaceful. Waking up is painful. It's not a metaphor or some alliteration in language or anything like that. Every time I wake up, I wake up to the tears that I've shed in sleep. Wonderful dreams and memories appear, yet there's nothing I can do to make those things stay the same. I hide myself where I'm safe and sound, and sooner or later, it's like my cage will be opened and I'll hit the ground. The enemy approaches... reality... fuck reality.

Why the hell should I give a damn about reality? Because the world is cruel, but I must hang on. Until I'm on my last breath, I have to keep crawling.

In my dreams, Touka is caressing my hair on a hilltop. The wind blows slowly; a glittering lake reflects sunlight; grass freely flows with the air. There, death is non-existent in the terms of war and battle. Everyone is alive, and no one is crying or fighting.

Dreams... that's all they are... I know, but what can I do except dream!? I ask myself this all the time! But there's never an answer! No one can answer- there's no one too answer... that's why.

* * *

"K-k..."

Hmm? Touka? "Yes?"

No response? Just an awkward look? "Something wrong, Touka?"

"N-no. Nothing," the flustered girl said as she walked away looking slightly irritated.

I hope it doesn't involve something I've done... nothing broken recently... confused. Very perplexed, I am.

Back to work, I guess.

* * *

Kureo Mado. Isn't he just absolutely wonderful. A married man- or previously. His wife was killed fighting the great Owl, and now he spends his days as a creepy quinque loving, old man in search of his partner's killer. He did his job well, astoundingly well, but he was off. His subordinates understood that he had some sort of disorder or another, but they had no choice but to follow him, after all, the First Class Investigator took his job more seriously than any other man or woman they knew.

And another, Koutarou Amon, worked himself to death, almost. Trying his hardest and attempting to do more than he can- a workaholic like him fit as Mado's underling. He would benefit from his senior's wise words, tactics and way of life.

No one questioned Mado's authority as a group leader. Even the higher ups acknowledged them.

After the bombing and killing of 3 officers, the group became an investigation unit that was to monitor the 20th Ward for the next two months.

Squad Goliath.

* * *

What am I doing just reading? I don't know. There's nothing like reading a book that gets you immersed into its world, especially a Sen Takatsuki book.

Thinking about it... Hide asked me to come over to his house today... I don't think it matters that much, he was more enthusiastic and obnoxious if anything, and his tone didn't sound like he needed me but more along the lines of wanting me there. Whatever it was, he can show me another time, I just want to finish reading my book alone.

That's impossible. My afternoon coffee outside and my book were interrupted by the all mighty and powerful Rabbit.

I noticed her standing and just staring at me with her hands behind her back. Soft breaths and a slight smile- did something good happen today? I didn't interfere with her queer stance and only observed her. The bangs over that eye... maybe she does look better like that. She didn't notice my sudden glances. After two minutes of waiting, Touka's seemingly lifeless body sat on the side opposite of me.

"Ken?"

Thy hast call for me? Setting the book aside and making sure to save my page, I responded to the girl's asking of my name. "Oh, hello Touka, what are you doing here?"

"Eheh... I was looking for you to give you this," said the girl, handing over a _book._

Lügen des Adligen: The Corrupt. Neither a classic nor an underground book. It was popular among the dramatic and action fans. I, myself, had wanted to buy this but completely forgot the name of it until now. Foreign languages aren't my forte, obviously.

"Is that all you came for?" I asked her.

"Are you saying that I'm wasting your time or something? Then le-"

I put my hand out in front of her and she immediately stopped her mouth. With the other, I picked up my Sen Takatsuki book and gave the petite girl a light hit on the head. "I appreciate the book, but I just want to know if you took time out of your day to bring this to me."

She looked away. "That's all I came here to do..."

Very out of character and random personality change... noted.

"Well, since you're here, I assume it's your day off."

"Mhm."

Very uncooperative today aren't we, _Touka-chan_. Best not let my thoughts transform into spoken words. "Would you like to do something?"

"Sure... Yoriko is practicing cooking today, and I'm a ghouls so I'd best not go to that."

Unneeded information. Very informative. Thank you for the explanation Queen of Oddities.

Stretch. "What do you want to do Touka?"

Glimpse. "Whatever is fine by me..."

Stare. "Let's go bye Hide's."

Wince. "Is someone finally ready to die?"

Surrender. "It was a joke, a joke."

Sigh. "I know..."

Laugh. "Then why get so flustered?"

Turn. "Because he's for Yoriko and I don't really see eye to eye with him."

"That's mean, Touka, we should head over there and apologize."

I was hit in the arm. It hurt- a lot, but I would live. Just rub it and hopefully it'll feel better. "At least you're honest with how you feel."

"Sort of..."

So she hates him more than I previously thought? I'm sorry Hide, but I don't think you'll ever achieve tranquiity with this girl. I will visit your grave daily.

I huffed and looked her in the eye, only for her pupil to change the direction it was facing. "So... um, no ideas?"

Awkward silence.

"How about we just go shopping, for fun? And then after maybe you could train me some more," I voiced my thoughts.

The girl smirked and proceeded to insult me, "Doofus, you think training is going to train anything in that body of yours?"

Touka, how I love this you. It's the best you. 'Love.' Not real love, of course- Touka deserves a man of respect and better attitude. Then why am I even thinking about this?

"I feel hurt..." I told her in a depressed tone.

"Whatever, let's just go."

Go figure, her personality changes as quick as an American tornado appears and disappears.

* * *

"This is cute..." I heard Touka say.

She was crouched down and looking at some bracelets she had spotted a minute earlier. It had some designs I couldn't see from all the way up here, where there were no bracelets.

"What does it say?"

She took two off of the rack they were on an brought it close to me. "Partage de la douleur."

"Do you even know what this says?" I questioned Touka.

The girl smiled and stared at one of the bracelets. "When I was little, my father told me and my brother this all the time. He had picked up this saying from a foreigner he met. It meant: Sharing pain."

Touka stretched out her arm to give me the second one; a white one, with hers pink. I stretched out my own arm and opened my hand where she firmly set it.

You and I will share pain. But isn't that the same for all ghouls? So why me..? Why? I'm but a lowly twig in the ghoul world, so why give something this emotional to me?

"Will you accept this like a gift from me?"

I don't want to make this girl cry or sad or mad.

"Yes."

So what is it that I want?

"I'm grateful, Ken. If I ever insulted you, I take it back. You're as important to me as Yoriko is, so now, it's like our official bond- we'll share the pain each other gets."

Maybe it's more.

I chuckled. "That sounds like a crappy love confession."

"Maybe it is..."

It made me happy and scared, that statement.

The world around me disappeared except for this small, lonely girl. Store? What store. Bracelet? Like none existed. Straightforward... that's not how I expected something like this to go down with any girl. Rize is proof of that. So what am I doing contemplating these events right now? Wasting time. I'm wasting time because I'm scared of the future. When the ghouls are hunted down- _if_ the ghouls are hunted down, then we might be on that list.

Her cheeks, slightly tinted, did nothing to her eyes as she looked at me with determination. Determination for what? Serenity... it felt peaceful in my own world. That dress of hers made the usually frustrated and hard-to-deal-with girl more cute than she should be.

My eyes were wide, and my body was in shock. My mind, left unfazed, was all that was left. And all I could do then was think. No nerves listened to my commands to move. Perhaps they would listen if that's what I truly wanted. I want to live in the moment that is now. Trying to convince myself that if I don't move it can stay like this- is that what I'm getting about?

Deep intakes of air. Slow breaths. One step forward, and then another. Another, and another. A gulp of saliva and down my throat it goes. Time, very slow it went. Reach out. Slow in the mind. I grabbed her shoulders, lightly and carefully, and pulled the girl closer into a hug. This time, it wasn't sad, and it wasn't out of randomness. During this moment, it was for happiness and joy. For ourselves, something the two of us could remember. A tightening grip, around me and her. The store was void of people, so it's doubtful anyone would care about a long, passionate grasp around the shoulders and waist.

"So that means you'll share everything with me, Touka?"

I could feel heat emitting from the girl's cheeks. She was only slightly smaller than me, yet her small body felt so fragile, despite the fact that she was a killer. I'm also a killer. Monsters during the night time, but beings of emotion and sentience during every hour. That was what we were.

"Yes... I'll let you know everything, and we'll live through this together."

Forever, I'll look back on this day and remember the irony. I went after the big breasted Rize, but got the petite Touka. I went after the book lover, but got a hot-headed ghoul. I'd watched my crush from afar, when I ended up with the girl that was closer during my encounters with said crush. We hated each other, but now we care a great deal for one another. She's a fighter, I'm a supporter.

It feels like a Shakespeare novel gone mad.

Stroking her soft and long hair, I smiled and closed my eyes. The happiness within me became ecstasy. Love is a drug.

Miraculous. The winds blew, and the flowers all waved with it.

"I feel... honored."

PINK SEDUM: The Bonds of Affection


	16. Black Rose: Resent

**For better experience, listen to some of the Tokyo Ghoul songs while reading. It feels a lot more... sad.**

* * *

Chirping. Birds. Blue sky. A gust of wind here and there. The citizens all going about the norm. Cars whizzing by; the kids yelling; the news played throughout the early morning on most radios and televisions.

And yet, all through this, sat a young boy reading a book all alone. Next to the river- relaxing. Deep into thought, reading his story over and over. Lovely, enchanting, sad, happy and memorable. That was his book. For those reasons he read it. It was not because he had no friends he read, it is because he read that he had no friends. It was his choice to make, and there was no regret in that choice for himself.

Life was good for this child.

His black hair waved with the wind during his read. No one to interrupt him; there was nothing better than that. Just the chance to read his books, the ones his father had left him after he had passed away. That's all he wanted. What else did he have to do? Nothing. His mother often worked late to care for their family as well as the young boy's greedy aunt. She would talk about her financial problems and yet her life was better lived than that of the black haired child and his mother's.

A small world for them it might have been, but cruel and merciless it was.

Many times the school bullies had provoked him into fighting back, but never did he do so. Even after they slapped away his books, bad mouthed him and beat him, he was unfazed. To them, that's the way it seemed, but really, all of it hurt him inside. "It's better to be hurt than hurt others," his mother would say. Even the fact of hitting someone, whether it caused them immediate harm or not, left a bad taste in the boy's mouth.

What else was he to do, a weakling like him? Sure, taking out anger and hitting someone semi-hard could work, but that wasn't the path for him. Getting beaten to a pulp seemed more painful than living without friends. So he continued to read his father's books. All day, every day- whenever he got the chance to. The child had a shallow personality. There wasn't much in his character other than the books. The books. The books. The books. When would it ever end?

It would be long after that it ended, in terms of a child's perspective of time.

* * *

"Mom! I'm home!" Yelled the young Ken Kaneki as he arrived to his house after school.

"Welcome back!" She replied as she usually did.

Kaneki took off his shoes at the entrance, greeted his mother, and left for his late father's study.

Just a normal day.

Kaneki's relationship with his mother was good. They cared for one another, even through hardships, just as mother and son should.

* * *

The days Kaneki spent cooped up in his father's study took a toll on him. He wasn't very good at talking to strangers. to put it bluntly, he was socially awkward, and this was because he never talked to anyone unless he absolutely needed to. People who asked him things would be ignored, with the exception of adults who had "authority" over him. Unappreciative to the other members of society, unable to talk with strangers and kept inside a single room for most of the day. A sad child, he was.

It was this time that he became rebellious with others. Not his mother, however.

Recently, the Asaoka family, Kaneki's mother's older sister, the one who greedily asked for money she didn't need, had been asking for more. And recently, Kaneki acted up.

The school acknowledged this and tried to contact the mother, but it was to no avail as she had not a clue as to why her son did this.

* * *

"Ooooooooooiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!" Yelled a small, blond boi.

He was the same age as Kaneki, but much more obnoxious than his new acquaintance.

"What?" He asked.

The blond sat next to Kaneki. "You looked lonely... that's all..."

"Is that bad?" Asked the black haired boy.

"It might be, but that's why I came to meet you... ya see, I don't have any friends so maybe you'd like to be friends?"

Kaneki's eyes widened some. "Why me?"

His question was answered rather vaguely. "Just because..."

The emotion of true happiness, the want for something without a reason, was unknown to him, and so hearing this confused him.

"I'm Hideoyshi Nagachika, nice to meet you," said the blond introducing himself with a big smile. He stuck his hand out to shake with Kaneki.

"Ken... Kaneki..." the other said as he shook hands with his new found friend.

Hideyoshi, or Hide, as he liked to be called, stared into the eyes of his "friend."

"What's wrong?" Hide asked.

Kaneki gasped. Scared; afraid, for no reason. He wondered how Hide knew something was wrong, after all, they'd only just met a few minutes ago. "N-nothing..."

"Don't lie! I'm your friend now, so you can tell me!" Hide stated. It was childish innocence; the want to help a friend in need. It wasn't the idea that was childish, it was the way he proceeded with trying to help.

Hide's world was filled with flowers and nice things. That's what Kaneki thought. That this kid had it all- a family, money, a good life... everything.

"Did something happen with your family?"

 _'It's like he can see right through me,'_ Kaneki thought. And it was very much like so.

Hide could see into people's souls almost. Within seconds he'd figure out the source of someone's problem's like an investigator but for emotions.

"My... my mom..." Kaneki slowly said. He wasn't hastily explaining everything, but he was giving enough information so that H8ide would understand.

She had died.

Kaneki began to cry. he balled and shed tears, but Hide smiled. He hugged his friend like a brother.

And so Kaneki shed more tears into the shoulder of Hide. He kept crying until he couldn't. The loss of his mother affected him greatly.

From then on, Ken Kaneki knew he had someone to lean on. Someone who would hear him out.

Hideyoshi Nagachika and Ken Kaneki. Inseparable brothers, almost. Both without a trustable family and friends- until now.

The family Ken Kaneki was put in after his mother died was unkind. The Asaoka family- his mother's aunt.

She treated him like garbage because she knew that Kaneki was better than her son, Yuuichi. His grades were excellent, while Yuuichi's were poor.

Every minute he spent with them felt like hell, so he separated himself from them as much as possible. He hid, ran away and did all he could to get away.

Hide was his only family now. Kaneki was, at heart, depressed, but tried his best to maintain a façade of happiness.

* * *

Hahahaha. Hide was his only family ever. His mother, who he loved, didn't love him back. It was an illusion set in place because he knew it wasn't his fault she did those things to him. The Asaoka family drove her to death, the Asaoka family drove her to abuse Kaneki. She had too much stress on her, so Kaneki tried to make it so that he remembered her as a good mother, even though it was all just an illusion.

So no matter what, Kaneki couldn't lose Hide.

* * *

 **Yeah, if you can't tell, this term, "happiness," well my writing style doesn't really do well with it so um... I tried, kinda.**


	17. Red Spider Lily: Fury

**Holy fuck. Das all I can say about this chapter.**

* * *

Cups crumbling. Glass shattering. Wood burning. Smoke intoxicating. Fire spreading. Hearts breaking.

I- I don't understand... I don't understand... I don't understand. Why? Why the fuck is this happening?

* * *

Quite a boring day. Hardly any customers today. I wonder why. Is something happening? Hmm... not that I remember. I don't recall there being any special event happening, as far as televised news goes. Maybe it's just an off day. I'm not sure, but it feels... weird, and vacant.

Whatever the problem, it's best not to worry about it. This gives me the chance to clean in more spots and make it an even cleaner coffee shop! What's gotten into me? Cleaning for fun..? Well I don't seem to have a problem with it so I suppose it's okay for me to do. On a more trivial note, why am I asking myself whether I should or shouldn't?

First the storage room. Organize everything into even neater categories, look for insects, throw out old stuff, catalog, make things look shiny. Task one (Task 5) complete. Now onto the kitchen. And then the tables. What have I set myself up for?

But like always, I prevailed (with the help of Nishiki Nishio)! Nishiki-senpai left soon after to pursue his woman. I hope they don't get into trouble...

Today's BORING. There is honestly nothing going on. It feels like hell. No books or anything. I'm just stuck on my shift. And Nishiki-senpai only left because he wanted to, and technically could since no one is here right now, leaving only me, Touka and the Manager. No one else cared enough to help me with my endeavor, with the exception of Nishiki-senpai.

I went looking around for the Manager, or Touka, in the evening. The Manager was asleep in the staff room, and Touka was probably upstairs. We've only had about 50 guests today, so a slow business is really sad, especially when everyone is entrusting ME to service them alone. But worry not, as I completed the tasks. Or tried. I'm not certain as to how well I did.

When there's a rough time, specifically when there haven't been customers in three hours, it's about time to close up shop. And so I did. I changed back into my casual clothes. I then guided myself to the staff room and covered the Manager with a blanket I had found laying around. I'm not sure if he's sensitive to noises, smells or touches in his sleep, but I hope I did the right thing and didn't wake him up.

After covering Yoshimura-san, I headed upstairs to see Touka. It might be awkward seeing her after two days of not seeing her, because of _that_ reason, but I had a duty to make sure she was okay. I was given this honor by the Manager himself, in an indirect way because I told him I was going to.

I gulped as I reached the doorway. Thinking didn't help. I only grew more nervous with the seconds passing and the ideas thought about. By the time I had reached the front of her room's door, I had been shaking, slightly. I'm certain _that_ didn't ruin our relationship, however, it's truly possible that we could have an interesting conversation and even insults thrown around. I'm just thinking about it more than I need to is all... okay, deep breath, and grasp the door handle. Slowly turn it as to not disturb anyone, then push lightly. The lights were off. The hallway lights let me see the inside of her apartment-thing, barely. I creeped in and heard a creaking noise, but it wasn't caused from my foot stepping in, I at least know that.

Quiet steps. Take your time Kaneki, there's no need to rush. I knew I was approaching her, slowly but surely. I came up to her bed and found herself lazily covered and all over the bed. Tornado sleeper?

I saw her eye peek open to look at me.

Hehehe, you can't fool me Touka! It's best I not do something like that again. Over a girl's body (sort of) with the face of a monster. It can only be taken one way.

Considering she was awake and watching me, I concluded that there was no real harm to our friendship, but I think it deepened it further, in a way. I had been confessed to for an unknown reason at a random time. I wanted to know why, but that could wait. Right now, I have to be happy. I won't deny that I love this girl more than anything. She has the cutest reactions to some things and protects everyone at Anteiku with more effort than someone should be able to give.

So I'm certain that suddenly laying on top of her stomach to make us look like a human cross wouldn't be bad, right? And that's what I did.

Her reaction was like cesium and water- violent and exceptionally quick. Her violence was from her mood and personality, and she quickly lifted her upper half to question me.

"W-what are you doing?"

"Sleeping on my territory."

Though there was darkness, crimson could be seen. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

I got up. No need to push the joke further. "It's nothing, Touka. I knew you were awake, so mind telling me why you pretended to sleep?"

"N-no reason," said the girl as she tilted her head away from me.

What a funny girl you are, Touka.

"H-hey."

"Hm?"

"If you tell anyone, I'm going to kill you," she threatened with a menacing look on her face. Her eyes, although very scary right now, were still the same eyes that I had come to adore.

I smiled at her, rather coyly, but continued my passive-aggressive assault. "But then you wouldn't have me."

She blushed, slightly, and returned to her normal behavior. "You get my point... asshole."

Asshole? Well aren't I just a bad boy today... well I'd still lose any fight with her.

"Alright, I'll keep this secret," I told her as I stuck out my pinkie finger. Overjoyed with trust, most likely, she did the same, and we promised to keep _that_ a secret for now.

"Thanks... Ken."

Of course, dreams don't make up the world. Not in the slightest. Nightmares area almost as ordinary as dreams.

* * *

It was nighttime by now. I had wished Touka a good night and made sure Yoshimura-san was comfortable, since he was still sleeping on the sofa when I had left.

The smell of the night city- not very pleasant, but this was the city I lived in, the least I could do was enjoy it and bathe in its feeling of home. The few people around the lights of the city buildings reminded me of that night. The first time I met the _real_ Touka Kirishima. The first time I experienced being a ghoul first hand. It was startling, and terrifying, but I've adapted to this scenery, and hopefully to the people around me. I don't ask for anything except for my fitting into society once again... or was I really ever? Ever since my mom died, I didn't talk to anyone but Hide. That's ironic too. Everything about being a ghoul so far has either been painful, happy or ironic. Being a half-ghoul has put me back into the world with more people, and I've made deeper and closer friends... so why does it still feel empty?

This time is when it's most peaceful. Any ghoul might say that. Most people are asleep or in their homes, and although it might not make a big difference on the bigger streets and corners, for places here, on smaller streets, it makes everything seem much more void of human life. It's a feeling of serenity when there's hardly anyone you have to worry about- with almost no people, there are almost no ghouls, meaning almost no investigators in the area (hopefully). Considering that they are mostly in areas where ghoul attacks are more clumped together.

But there's also those times that hurt... when Ryouko-san was killed, it nearly made me give up on life. Human deaths I had seen before, but a mother and a child killed so relentlessly... come on? I mean, who would do that right?! RIGHT?! The investigators... hypocrites... I fucking hate them! Evil ghouls... we're not evil! We just can't do anything else... no, they. I have to do something. I am half ghoul, half human, and like Yoshimura-san said, I'm the bridge between two worlds. There might be more half-ghouls out in the world, but none of them have even tried to establish a connection to co-exist. There is nothing that can hold me back except for those investigators. I have to do something! Then maybe, just maybe, I'll feel at peace. And in the coffee shop... we'll all be together, living happily without the worry of any doves... that sounds nice. Maybe I could even have a family with Touka. No, no- it's too early for something like that, haha. But it would be nice to get rid of _that_ side of her. The one with murderous intent. If it's possible, I want to bring out the rabbit within her- the cute, adorable, pretty side of her. We don't need the evil part of her personality lurking. Her threats and all can stay... but that's her, and I wouldn't have it any either way.

Love, huh? I've only experienced it twice, and the first time didn't work out so well... I sighed. I thought about all this as I walked home.

"Hey mom! C'mon let's go faster!" I don't know what hit me then, but it was an ominous feeling. Something I would later feel remorse or guilt for. Why? I'm not sure. Instinct maybe. I'd felt like this before, and it ended terribly that time.

I turned around and saw a child pulling her mother. They both had bags in their hand that most likely came from a store they had gone too for a night grocery run.

They looked... happy. How a mother and child should be. How I couldn't be.

Gone. They were no longer there. Vanished. _Vaporized_.

Smoke, fire- nothing. There was no one left where I had just been looking. Instantly, with the sound of the ground breaking and atoms ripping apart, they had been killed. Mother and son, dead. Mom and child- like last time. Why why why why WHY?! What did they do to deserve that?! I couldn't even move. I just stood there, bewildered, wondering what had happened. A bomb? Like the other nights? But those were officers... they at least had motivation. WHAT MOTIVATION COULD COME FROM KILLING INNOCENTS?! What was the plan? I walked, slowly, to where the family of two had been up to a few moments ago and found a finger. A severed limb of the hand, burnt and scratched all over.

I dropped to my knees in fury and sadness. I had witnessed many death, brutal, unglorified, dishonorable, and putrid, but none that pained me so much as this. My head tilted up to the sky as I cried out. Was it raining? The feeling of water going down my face- it was tears. Did I break? Hardly. It angered me, and I was crying, but the severity of the situation didn't affect my thoughts. I looked back to the explosion crater with eyes half open. So this is the world we live in, huh? This is what stands in the way of me and joy in this life? The stupidity of these damned people?! People were gathering by me, trying to ask me questions about what had just caused this, but I ignored them all. I don't know the answers to any of their questions. All I know is that I know who the enemy is. Not the investigators, not the other ghouls. It's those insects of life that cause these deaths. War is justifiable, but making a person watch a family die right in front of his eyes... unforgivable.

I stood up and started to walk away as the crowd got bigger to interrogate me.

"Did you cause this?!" I heard a woman yell out.

And I broke. I grabbed her, some girl in her late 20s at most, and looked her in her eyes, penetrating as deep into her soul as I could. "DO I LOOK LIKE THE PERSON WHO WOULD CAUSE THIS?! I JUST SAW TWO PEOPLE DIE IN A DEATH FAR WORSE THAN A GHOUL EATING A HUMAN!" I could've killed them all for annoying me, but I held back. No more death is necessary. I want to prevent people dying, not be a cause of it. I let go of her and she backed away, as did everyone else.

My feet started to walk away from the scene. The look on my face... was it ugly, God? Could you describe my heart with passion. Praying won't help me, so I won't. There's only one thing left to do. Declare war on these savages, whoever they are. That's my only option. I'm not going to sit back and watch.

Can I describe myself as human? No. Can I say that I am human? No. Could others call me a human? No. Do I want to be a human? No.

As a human, I'm useless.


	18. EnCounter

For whatever reason, Kaneki didn't show up for work the day after. It's been a week since then. Anteiku investigated the matter and contacted his associates, as well as entering his house without permission. They had found no trace of him, and so all was left to the imagination. There were no clues or hints as to where the boy had gone. It seemed dull in the coffee shop without him. Their favorite bookworm was no where to be found, and Touka was left in a cage of anticipation, want and mental agony. She and Hide were hit the hardest, being the closest to him. With his disappearance, the Nagachika boy came by the shop to talk more often. The other employees had come to accept him as a human that knew their true identity. Even so, he never brought up life as a ghoul- he understood them, partially, because of Kaneki. He had no reason to ask about their lives as ghouls, and so he stayed in the present.

The air, lifeless, without him was haunting. Within a mere two days, Kaneki had established a presence within Touka like no other had. And just as fast, he had quickly left. An incredibly melancholic feeling was all that he left with her. She longed for his return, as did the others, but with no idea as to where are why he went, they could only hope.

Dreadful, for Hide. His best friend, his class partner, his lady's-man-in-training- what had gone wrong? Well there were a lot of things that could've happened... but Hide couldn't come up with a reasonable conclusion. Anyways, he had more important matters to attend to. He had faith in Kaneki's ability, and that's all he could provide for his friend. Hide knew that much.

It was Touka's day off, and she decided to go for a walk. She put on her coat, brushed her hair and slid on her shoes. Before leaving, she looked down at her bracelet, the pink one she got with Kaneki. "Asshole," she said as her hand reached for the door. Outside, she aimlessly walked with her hands in the pockets of her sweater. She paid no mind to those around her or the world around her. She continued to walk until she had found herself near that fateful location that changed the both of them: Hinami and Ms. Ryouko's location of death. By now all evidence of the killings were nonexistent, but even so, she teared up thinking about it. She pulled her hands out of her pocket and grasped the bracelet firmly as tears came out of her eyes. The feeling of Kaneki holding her close to comfort and relax her when they had reached his home after this event was heartwarming. Even if it was sad to lose two people she cared about, she gained another that, although couldn't fill that void of despair, could at least act as her blanket and pillow.

In emotional pain, she quickly walked away from there. Kaneki wasn't the type to linger around places like that without a reason. It was hard to cope without him. She had never realized it until now, how much he really helped around Anteiku, how much he helped her personally, and how much she really needed him. For the longest time, she thought she hated him, but it was nothing more than a poor girl who didn't know how to put her feelings into affection. It wasn't her fault though. For the longest time, she could only hate and be angered and, like Kaneki, she had one real friend.

When did she fall for him. That's a good question. Even she didn't know. All Touka Kirishima knew was that: since he started working at Anteiku, her gloomy life has lifted up a little. Yoriko was no longer the only person she could talk to on a deep level, and it hugely affected her. Up until recently, her talkative manner to the rest of the employees, even Nishiki Nishio, were relatively kind-hearted with little to-no insults.

That boy... within a matter of weeks, he had changed Touka's perspective of the world. She gained a respect for humans. Learning about their world, about his life as a human and what daily life was really like- it interested her. His stories, of himself and Hide, or even things he would make up when asked to, and she would openly take it all in.

The girl wiped her eyes and thought about those times. It made her smile. And the times the idiot made a mistake, it made her giggle. There were a lot of qualities she liked about Kaneki.

For all that it was worth, right now, the black haired girl could say with an honest heart, that she loved Ken Kaneki. Maybe not openly, to him, since it would be way too early according to her American rom-com television dubs, but someday, of course.

Touka Kirishima promised to wait that day. To wait for the day her Kaneki would come back, and she promised that she would look forward like he always told him. What a hypocrite.

* * *

"Why do you do this, Eyepatch? What's you goal!? You're just aimlessly killing ghouls!" Asked an ukaku ghoul.

His opponent, the one he was speaking about, Eyepatch, stared at him with his one visible, ghoulified eye. He looked down at his hands as he began to count, and then looked back to the other ghoul.

"Aimlessly..? Isn't what you're doing aimless? I hear of a man they call The Joker, do you mind telling me about him?" Asked Eyepatch.

The man didn't hesitate to answer. His response was, for the most part, incorrect, however.

"Where the fuck did you learn tha-"

Before being able to finish his sentence, a rinkaku kagune pierced through his abdomen, followed by three other strikes of the same nature.

Eyepatch looked at the ground solemnly as he pulled his kagune out of the now-deceased-man. "I'd rather not kill, in all honesty- however, I have no time to play games. The bomb is ticking."

A kagune-like limb stretched itself out from behind Eyepatch and tried to kill him. The black haired ghoul tirelessly avoided and stepped back to look behind him. A ghoul investigator.

"Investigators Mado and Amon. What business do you have with me?" Asked the ghoul.

"I heard that there was a massacre of ghouls around here, particularly from a group called Aogiri Tree. Apparently one of the leaders killed was known as The Joker," answered Amon.

Mado smiled. "And there's only one ghoul around the 20th, 17th and 18th Wards than a single ghoul single-handedly attacks and kills his own kind, and that would be you, my dear Black Reaper."

"Black Reaper? Is that what the CCG calls me now? I never wanted something as crude sounding as that. Eyepatch was fine."

Amon stood on guard with his quinque, the anti-ghoul weapons, in front of him and ready. Mado smiled an even greater smile than what he had already been smiling.

"This is the interesting about you- it's like you understand humans enough that you talk to each one as your acquaintance, and never have you killed one of our investigators. Ghouls and humans should stay separate. You being a ghoul means that you deserve to die!"

The ghoul perked up and tilted his head in an abnormal manner as he unzipped his mask to reveal his mouth. "Don't act like you understand me."

Mado, instinctively, could guess a ghoul suspect as being a true threat or not. He lost his wife to the Owl, an SS rank ghoul many years ago, but the feeling he got from this ghoul was not quite the same. The Eyepatch, or, the Black Reaper as they now called him, inspired fear through a completely different manner from any ghoul Mado and Amon had faces in their lifetimes. The Owl gained a reputation through its bloodlust and lethality; Jason tortured ghouls and humans alike; the Rabbit they fought once had frightening speed, but the Black Reaper was different. Rather than use pain and suffering, this ghoul's words and gestures alone gave him the name he now owns.

The white haired investigator quickly striked with his quinque, piercing the Black Reaper's right shoulder. He was, however, unfazed. Mado pulled his quinque out from his opposer's body. "Do you have any intention of fighting?" He asked.

"That quinque- I knew that girl, albeit for a short period of time. And the other one you have with you was her mother. I saw you kill them both, and I would like to kill the both of you... but you're only doing your job, and I can't blame you for that."

Mado put his weapon away. "Let's go Amon- he killed one of our most wanted. We'll just say you killed them all without hesitation."

"Take credit for the kill. I couldn't care less, as long as I get to Centipede."

"Tch." The two investigators walked away afterwards.

Amon looked at his comrade. "Why didn't we fight him?"

Mado, being a man of instinct, responded with a half-lie. "He'll be of use in cleaning up ghouls. We'll get him one day, Koutarou Amon."

"I understand, sir."

"Good, now, we have more work to do."

The Black Reaper watched the two as they slowly faded away from his vision. He took a deep breath before looking at his wound, which, by now, had already been healed by his RC's regenerative power. He could recover from attacks almost instantly, which surprised him sometimes. He wore plain clothes- black pants, a black hoodie and black shoes, as well as his mask, but that's a given for a ghoul.

He took of his hoodie and placed it on his shoulder. The Reaper then placed his hands on his face and began to remove his mask, all the while walking away from the battle scene. The ghoulified eye reverted back to its normal state.

It started to rain. The dark, empty night turned into a somewhat beautiful day, perhaps. Rain wasn't all that bad to him: Ken Kaneki. The feeling of water pouring on his body was slightly... relaxing, if anything.

"I should visit them sometime. It's been a while, Anteiku."

* * *

"The Joker is dead."

"What?"

"He was killed yesterday in the 18th."

"Ehhh. That's unfortunate."

"So what do we do?"

"Put the Queen in his place. Joker wasn't really an asset, but he was friendly and loyal... who killed him?"

"Eyepatch. One of the human associates witnessed the Eyepatch kill him and all of his men."

"So Aogiri was hit too? What's the Eyepatch after?"

"We're not sure. A CCG insider reported that they changed his identification to the Black Reaper."

"Scary. I wonder if he's doing it for his ghoul-lady friends."

"Very funny... Aogiri is on the move, be ready."

"Don't worry, Nadeko. Within a few days Operation Demigod will be complete. I really wish we had more backers though. What do you think about marrying a pretty human, huh? Maybe have a one-eyed child. Hmm?"

"I understand, and... I'm not completely against that idea, but let's not talk about having kids, not when we're planning to start a war."

"Lighten up, I hate talking serious about everything. I know someone who's just like you, but he actually laughs. You'll have to learn from him one day."

"Anyways, it turns out that Eyepatch has only been reported by the CCG. There is no other evidence of his existence other than them and ourselves."

"So what you're saying is that no one else knows of this guy?"

"In simple, yes. The Black Reaper is a myth among Aogiri, since they've had no survivors as of yet."

"Frightening."

* * *

The scent of coffee lingered throughout the air inside of a certain coffee shop. The employees, all present, were enjoying a night of party. It was the anniversary of the founding of Anteiku- one of the only days all of the members got together and stayed up for as long as they could, drinking and having fun. Forgetting the past that's been molded by sorrow and enjoying the memories to be made in the present.

By the time everyone had settled down, it was early in the morning. They did this every other year, and was always something they looked forward to like a family looking forward to Christmas.

The slight light outside poured through the windows and into the shop. Dust particles were the lonely movement other than the soft breathing of the sleeping ghouls and humans. The bells clanged and the door squeaked open as someone came in.

"So this is Anteiku?" Asked a tall, blond man.

"Yeah... look at this disgrace. My stupid sister- how could she become like this?" Said another stern, black haired male as he walked around.

A third walked in but only marveled at the blond, refusing to acknowledge the other people present in the room.

Suddenly, a kagune appeared and stabbed the third through the chest as two others proceeded to wake the others up.

Irimi, Kouma, the Manager, Yoshimoro, Touka, Nishio and Kimi were all together. It was Nishio who attacked.

"That feels quite pleasant, thank you young man for this treat," said the man who was stabbed. He chuckled lightly as Nishio pulled his kagune out of his opponent's stomach.

The Anteiku employee's face turned into shock over the fact that his attack had the opposite effect it was intended. "What the fuck are you?"

"My, how rude," the man said as he touched his own face, "I'm merely another ghoul such as yourself, there's nothing too different about me from you."

"I'd say that's pretty debatable!" Nishio yelled as he once again advanced on his enemy.

The man Nishio conversed with had parried the attack, and he soon found his face in the hand of the blond.

"Oh, what a fabulous catch Yamori," he said as he watched his superior lift up Nishio.

He, identified as "Yamori," then grabbed Nishio's kagune and ripped it off with brute force. "I'm looking for Rize Kamishiro, if you would so kindly tell me where she is, I wont have to kill this one."

Kimi screamed and she ran towards her boyfriend, ignoring Touka's calls to not get close to the tall man. "Let go of Nishi-" She was kicked away by the second man. A masked, black haired boy that did so without hesitation.

The girl flew back and hit the wall hard. She gasped for breath and held herself as she wheezed in pain.

Her attacker took his mask off and revealed himself to all of Anteiku. "Hello, Touka. I see you're still living with these shits."

"Ayato..."

"Look, tell us where Rize is, and no one else needs to get hurt. Your guy over here can get crushed by Yamori's hand at any time, and he knows it too. I'd rather not have to kill the likes of you people. So what'll it be?"

Nishio struggled and tried to hit Yamori for causing Kimi to get hurt, but the latter only compressed his hand even more, causing Nishio to call out in pain his girlfriend's name.

"She's gone... that bitch is dead! Killed under construction pipes! There, I told you, now leave us alone!" Touka cried out as she remembered the day Hinami and Mrs. Ryouko were killed. She didn't want to see anyone else get hurt, not after that.

Yamori looked solemn for a moment. "So she's dead, ey? Killed by something as miniscule as construction pipes? How utterly disappointing... take everyone but the old one, I'll handle him right now."

 **Chapter 18: EnCounter**

* * *

 **Due to being in the country of Mexico, I can't post as much. Rip. I want to make longer chapters though.**


	19. Found

**The rest of this is third person I guess**

* * *

The coffee shop looked as it always had- but there was something different, it wasn't open. Up the stairs, one step at a time, until he reached the door. His hand gripped the knob and pulled it to the side while simultaneously pushing it open. The look on his face was unchanged as he looked around to see a mess of blood, broken tables, glass and other things. Lying on one wall was the manager of the establishment, lying unconscious and draped in the red substance.

Ken Kaneki approached the Manager whilst stepping and shattering already-broken glass. His hand turned into a fist as it vibrated with anger; his lip quivered as he bit himself, and the steps he took seemed more forceful than before. Kaneki's eyes shut close for a moment before re-opening them to focus on the problem in front of him. Reaching the wall the old man laid on, he bent over slowly and put his hands under the man's legs and behind his back, slowly picking him up as to make sure he didn't harm him. Slowly lifting the man up woke him up. The contact with Kaneki was enough to reawaken him, and the Manager slowly opened one eye to view the man carrying him. He was not shocked nor surprised to see Kaneki, with little effort, carrying him into a more comfortable room to get cleaned up and aided.

"Long time no see, Kaneki-kun," the old man said in a faint and quiet voice.

"Yeah... I apologize for leaving without a word," responded the younger male. Kaneki was glad that he could talk to the Manager. For the time he knew him, the Manager was like the father figure Kaneki didn't have. Wise, never backing down on his thoughts, caring, thoughtful- he was someone Kaneki could rely on no matter what.

The Manager inhaled some air as he was lethargic and needed something to eat to regain lost strength. "I don't blame you; in my younger days, I'd have done the same in a situation like yours. I don't know the reason as to why you left, but I assume it had something to do with protecting the people at Anteiku," the Manager said, exasperating more strength.

Kaneki's eyes widened. He was that obvious; that simple... or maybe the Manager was just that smart. Either way, his intentions were understood, and that was satisfactory enough.

Finally reaching the couch, Kaneki set the Manager down, without second thought of the stains the blood would leave on the couch. That can always get replaced, anyways, so there was no worry. The black haired boy then quickly proceeded to gather water, towels, drinking water and a few packages of meat for his senior.

He helped the white haired man wash up and waited as he changed into another set of clothes.

The Manager walked back into the room.

The sign at Anteiku's door- closed.

Kaneki helped to sit him down as he was still injured.

The windows covered to hide the mess that was inside.

"I'm sure you have your questions for me, and so I will tell you what I know: Aogiri Tree came looking for Rize Kamishiro, and then they attacked us. Yomo was able to escape with Nishio-kun's human lover... but I'm afraid no one else was able to escape their grasp," explained Yoshimura as basically as he could.

Kaneki processed the information given to him for a few moments, letting it all slip in, and thinking about what the future may hold and what he should do now.

"I understand," said Kaneki, "I'll help clean the shop, and then I'll chase after them."

"No. Cleaning this place is my duty- it is my home. Go find the precious employees of Anteiku, that's what you should do."

"But-"

"Go, I can handle this much myself," the Manager said as he smiled. Kaneki got up and headed towards the door before he was stopped by the voice of his fatherly figure. "Welcome back, Kaneki-kun."

The boy didn't turn back, but he stayed still for a moment and smiled before shedding a tear. Once again gripping his hand, he continued walking towards the door and left the coffee shop.

The Manager sat and thought about Kaneki. What a man he's grown into. He fears not a foe that is more threatening than he, but he feels fear all the same as an ordinary person, ghoul or not.

The moment Kaneki thought he had disappeared from view, he ran, almost tripping and falling down the stairs, and darted away down the street covering his face with a hood and running as swiftly as he could. He dodged the civilians and hid in an alley where he screamed as loud as he could. He might've become stronger within 2 weeks, but his heart was still fragile, but that was the human side of him, supposedly.

He stood up and made an oath to himself- to never cry when you haven't truly lost. The marking he bare on his jacket was a Shinigami. A death god- a _reaper_. It was a symbol he wanted for himself, a giver of power and confidence... but that _was_ its intention. Its intention, currently, is just a mark. A representation, an individualistic piece that he wore. There was no secret reason he wore it, and there was no one to question him about such a jacket- after all, many people wear things like this, so no one's going to question him.

He rambled to himself too often, so he decided to stop that too. It wasn't him. He did that a lot in his childhood, when there was no one else he could turn to. He had remembered his mother's true nature- abusive and almost psychopathic, but Kaneki couldn't blame her for that... it was his aunt's fault. His mother just fell under the pressure.

'It's better to be hurt than to hurt others' she always said. Was it really true? It didn't matter at this point... it was either kill or be killed, and there was no chance that Kaneki was just going to let himself die! There is much he has to do, many people he has to see- an entire story awaiting him.

Kaneki turned to his left and peered down the alley, and then the opposite direction. There was no one else there but him.

 _Alone_. He didn't want that again! The loneliness... he couldn't bare it. No matter how much he stood it in the past, after everything that's happened, after all the friend's he's made- BEING ALONE WAS UNACCEPTABLE!

He walked out of the alleyway and stood tall as he looked around. He noticed how many people were there, for the first time. Since childhood, he'd always shut these strangers out like they didn't exist, but now, he saw their faces and noticed their emotions.

All of these strangers- all of these innocents, trapped in between a war they had no control over, no power to defend themselves with, nothing!

These people who needed to live; the ones who hate ghouls, the ones who hate humans- to save them from this pointless fight would be enough.

So that was his goal. That was Kaneki's determination. The first step to achieving this would be to rescue his friends. Touka, Enji, Irimi, Nishio- everyone who was prisoner. He didn't want to be a hero of justice, Kaneki wanted to be seen by the world as something good.

That's it! He had it all figured out in his head, now to work towards that dream.

 **Chapter 19: Rebirth**

* * *

I


	20. resolve

Yomo and Kimi returned to help the Manager, and so a certain ghoul was able to feel less burdened about leaving them once more for something.

The time to act was now. Ken Kankeki had found the location of Aogiri's main base in the area and quietly told the CCG about it- of course, not as the Black Reaper. Within the following day, they had alerted all of their personnel about the attack, and no one is to mention it until the day it was to happen. Squad Goliath, consisting of Kureo Mado and Koutarou Amon, would lead the vanguard force with the help of other veteran investigators, including their newest member Juuzyou Suzuya. The leader of the attack would be a man that went by the name of Shinohara. He wasn't chosen as the leader of the supposed battle that was to happen, he was just chosen as the "field" commander, in simplest terms. Of course, the CCG has a very complex structure, so there were commanders of other things as well.

Would the famed Owl show up during this battle was another thought of the CCG, so they prepared for that as well.

The most unconventional and questionable order, however, would be that if the newest addition to their list of S Rank ghouls showed up, the Black Reaper, they were to not harm him. Mado and Amon had told their superiors that he was essential to the battle and that his death by their hands would come some time later during a more... convenient time, after all, they're about to fight for control of the area- the CCG would need help to reduce casualties and increase the chances of winning the fight. But, the men and women were cocky, there was no way they'd lose to a recently organized group of ghouls, especially when there's a ghoul single-handedly picking off their footmen like nothing.

Ken Kaneki knew not if his friends were being held at this location. If they were, it's a miracle- if not, well, he didn't want to think about that.

Today was the day. Kaneki stood atop a building watching the evacuations with his ghoul mask on. The once-clumsy Kaneki now a stern, fighter- it was ironic. He had gotten rid of the eyepatch on his mask. One-eyed ghoul or not, the eyepatch held him back some. Lack of depth perception and the inability to see to his other side weren't very useful perks of the eyepatch, so there was no need for it.

It was cold, but it was night, ordinary. The flashing lights of the CCG vehicles lit up the streets as he looked on to his target. A huge complex, and from the windows, he spotted Aogiri members with guns and red hoods. A standstill between them and the soldiers they aimed their weapons at. Behind the CCG guards was a man warning them to stand down and surrender or die. The ghoul organization was having none of it, as they all stayed silent with their guns pointed at their opposers.

A myriad of the humans were stationed all around the area to make sure that no one escaped.

Gray was a dull color, and red, or mahogany, or whatever it was Aogiri was wearing, was also putrid. Their colors held no meaning.

"Kaneki-kun, are you sure we're going to do this?" Asked a certain man from Kaneki's past, one that, before, he hated with all his might.

Kaneki turned around to view them- the people willing to help his cause: Uta, Tsukiyama, a new friend of Kaneki's named Banjou, and Banjou's three followers who wore gas masks.

Uta came to Kaneki himself asking if he could be of assistance. The 18 year old boy originally had no intentions of building a team, but the idea was good. Kaneki told Uta his plan to storm Aogiri with the CCG, and Uta agreed. He later visited his enemy, Tsukiyama, and decided to forgive his actions. In return for helping Kaneki, the boy would allow the French-accented gourmet to have a bite of his shoulder. Of course Tsukiyama agreed under such opportunistic times. Banjou and his followers were freed from the hands of Aogiri under an encounter, which is where he learned of their whereabouts. After hearing of Uta and Tsukiyama joining Kaneki to attack the Aogiri base they had told him about, the four asked to join him, not save Anteiku's eomployees, but to save anyone they could. Inside of there was hell. Forced to labor, small portions of food for their lower ranked members and killing of even children for food. Sure, it was a war, but to kill a child with his own hands was too much for Banjou.

Now the six stood before him, draped in a white cloth that had the symbol of a goat on its back. A Black Reaper can have a white heart- pure, deadly, righteous.

Kaneki, as well, had one and put it on before answering. "Yes, Tsukiyama-san... if you're going to leave, to it now."

No one moved.

Uta raised his hand.

"What is it?"

"Why did you remove the eyepatch?" Asked the former.

Kaneki didn't want to offend his friend and tell him it was a hindrance, so he made up a lie. "There are stories of the One Eyed King being the leader of Aogiri, so, I plan to take the role of king here."

A petty lie was convincing enough for Uta, and he laughed at Kaneki's answer, as did Banjou.

"Quite a new boss we have here don't we?" Said the bearded man rhetorically. The three gas masks laughed as well. Such an odd one.

Kaneki released his kagune. "Let's go now... it's time to make an entrance."

He climbed down from the building, and the others followed. The leader of the "Goats" wasn't much for flashy things. He preferred being unnoticable and in a corner with a book, but to change the world, you need to make yourself stand out.

They touched the ground and immediately ran towards the complex. They passed soldiers upon soldiers that were startled to see white-caped ghouls seemingly fly through the city. Had it not been for the sight of the Black Reaper, a ghoul who was apparently not an enemy, they would have immediately sprayed their Q bullets into them.

Even with such terrifying masks on such terrifying creatures, their movements were majestic, smooth and quiet. The fact that they didn't attack the CCG amazed them on its own.

They approached the building when they suddenly halted their quick advance and stood for a moment to gain courage. Then, at once, the goats started to walk through the line of CCG officers and into the front lines.

It would be wrong to say the CCG wasn't scared of betrayal or a sudden attack, but it never came as they reached the front where they peered into the windows to find Aogiri watching them with expressions of shock.

The team of investigators told to lead the vanguard CCG stood and watched the Goat, ready to attack Aogiri. The need for the Black Reaper and his companions was something Kureo Mado had ordered by instinct, and the acquaintances of Mado trusted his instincts always, and thus they refused to worry about their enemy's enemy.

Kaneki moved too quick for the CCG to realize, in their bewilderment nonetheless, that only one of his eyes was ghoulified, but for now, it didn't matter. He walked without his ghoulification in order to show that he meant no harm to the CCG.

"Ghouls?! Helping the CCG?! Is this a joke?! The seven of you are going to help these bastards who've terrorized us since the beginning of time?! What the fuck is going on in your heads?" Yelled one of the red-caped men.

Kaneki thought for a moment- a single minute to ponder on his response. He was never a good speaker, but he needed something to help him now. "The only reason they treat you like animals is because you refuse to change. Do you know how many protests, wars and revolutions are fought for equality? This isn't a fight to live or be equal, this is a fight for your superiority, and the idiots here follow your lead."

The black haired boy was being objective, but the leader of the entire CCG operation hit a wall of the mobile command center. "Bastard! He's right though... bastard!"

"Or is this something bigger than that for you? Tell me, Aogiri Tree," Kaneki asked, waiting for an intellectual response.

"You think you know anything? You're probably some good for nothing that's been living off of someone else in the shadows!" Responded another member of the ghoul organization.

"Ignorant!" Shouted Kaneki, "I was beat as a kid! I had one friend! My mother died, my father died, my friends have been hurt and killed, the family that was supposed to protect me just beat me more! Until recently I hadn't even felt love for anything but a single friend... and then you take that away... I just want this war to stop! Too many people die and too many lose things... take the hint already! How many of you are fighting because you know someone who was killed by the CCG, and you too!" He pointed at them as he turned around and ghoulified, revealing his one red eye. "How many of you are doing the same? You're just going to keep killing each other forever until your both dead!" Kaneki stopped to inhale and exhale some. "If we're going to fight," he turned back around, "then let's get it over with... sentiment doesn't work on arrogant fools!"

The CCG were surprised at the ghoul, for his speech and his one eye. But Kaneki was right, the CCG didn't take his words seriously. They brushed it off, how could he be right? It's the ghoul's fault for existing and other things. And Aogiri- a ghoul speaking for co-existence? Unreasonable, heretic, disgusting. Who does he think he is saying things like this. Losing someone was normal for a ghoul, so it's not like he suffered anymore than them in their minds.

And it was then that he walked out. In his hands was a young, black haired girl. Following him, were three others, also with other people in their arms.

"Considering an employee from Anteiku was missing, I thought to myself 'Why not torture these guys until the other one came?' And then it hit me! How about I continue torturing them in front of you?!"

Kaneki's eyes widened. Anteiku was just revealed to the entire CCG, but that was the least of his worries. Tortured... hurt... put to the brink of death... done over and over because ghouls regenerate... it angered him inside. He was furious. If the Black Reaper and his friends had just been ratted out by an enemy faction, then there's no use for a mask to hide himself. He took it off and threw it aside revealing the entirety of his face to anyone who could see. Some members of both sides were surprised to see an innocent looking boy, but became more fearful at the expression that laid on his face.

"Kaneki-kun wai-"

"What did you do to them?!"

Some of the CCG members whispered about a "Jason." So this was the Jason of Aogiri.

"My name is Yamori- and would you like to know what I did to them? Would you? Would you really?!" He dropped the girl he held in his arms. A part of Kaneki's hair turned white. Marie Antoinette Syndrome. "I took this," he took out some pair of pliers or other tool, "and I reached right up to their toes and fingers," Kaneki screamed internally as he knew where this was headed, "and I closed shut! They counted down from 1000 by 7 just so they could stay sane enough to bare even more pain!"

Banjou had seen Yamori do this before, and it angered him, and he would've joined Kaneki in his fury, but by this time, he was passed getting riled up about it, but that didn't mean it didn't anger him. Even his three friends started to feel bad for Kaneki and use his anger as motivation to be ready for a fight.

"Would you like to know what else I did?! I took some centipedes -very painful ones- and stuck them in their ears! I asked them if it was okay but they didn't let me, so I had to force it in. Their screams were amazing! I've never had so much fun in one day!"

"No! No! No! No No! NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!" Kaneki screamed with all his might. He clenched his teeth so hard they could've broken. His face was ugly- it was a face like he's never done before. More white.

Yamori laughed uncontrollably as some of his underlings looked disgusted at him. To have him as a superior was the worst, but at least he was strong. The CCG members responded to Yamori by pointing many of their guns at him. He was psychopathic, it might be possible for him alone to wipe out a hundred of their forces.

Although Tsukiyama did things like this as well, he couldn't understand why Yamori used this method. They weren't fighting for their lives, they were fighting to survive hell. Tsukiyama's methods were to put one person against another, then they'd have a chance to live... but here, everyone would live, they just had to go through torment and a demon of the underworld.

And Uta... he was once a cocky teenager who ruled a ward, but now he was a semi-pacifist who didn't want his friends to be hurt. There was no way that this man would live beyond this, Uta vowed. There wasn't a chance in hell that Yamori was leaving alive. He was going to approach Yamori and fight him before he was stopped by Tsukiyama.

"Non, you mustn't... look at Kaneki-kun," whispered the gourmet into his ear.

Uta saw Kaneki's hair- the simple mentioning of the pain Yamori caused Kaneki to suffer this much... and he could feel the aura off of him. A true man of death.

"Koutarou Amon... Kureo Mado!" Kaneki shouted. "The rest of the CCG... Aogiri! If you harm them I'll kill you! I'm going to kill these in front of me and you will fight to your heart's content! But you will not touch these or I and Goat will kill you!"

Kaneki's friends were surprised to hear such a voice from their Kaneki, but anger does things to people.

"Put your weapons down," ordered Amon through the radio.

"What? What's the meaning of this? Put your weapons up! I am your supreme commander here! Do you hea-"

"Sir, I was to see this fight, please stop what you're doing, or I might have to use this nice motorcycle of yours!" Juuzyou told him as he admired the bike. "Nee, it looks like it can handle a lot."

The man angrily ordered to do as Amon said. His precious bike was worth more than a simple showdown between soldiers in a battle that isn't starting.

The wind blew as the teenager stepped forward ready to kill the man in front of him. The three ghouls that followed Yamori out stepped backwards into the complex.

Kaneki jumped to reach his destination faster, and he soon found himself staring into the insane eyes of the blond thing that was Yamori. A helicopter above them appeared minuets ago to record an encounter between CCG-supported ghouls and their enemy. The winds made Kaneki's rags blow and create sound. Yamori didn't mind the light he felt, after all, this was such a marvelous event. To fight a one-eyed ghoul was a once-in-a-lifetime sort of ordeal.

There was only one thing to worry about now- this man in front of him. A battle for the life of something greater than Kaneki's own life- Touka's. Another person dying because of him... he couldn't let it happen, no matter what!

Yamori smiled. Swiftly, and hard, he kicked Touka up and at Kaneki. Her diaphragm made her compulsively start coughing as she flew into the air. Kaneki caught her with his hands and avoided Yamori's fist which came at him like a rocket.

It took him a moment to regain his stance, but the boy continuously parried more of Yamori's hand attacks. Suddenly Yamori jumped and ended up behind him. Worried for Touka's safety, he covered her as best as he could and ran as far as he could before getting hit by Yamori's fist, sending him flying fifteen feet. Kaneki released his kagune to reduce the impact on him and Touka as he covered her with his body. They rolled another two feet as Kaneki instantaneously stood up and set Touka on the ground, leaving his jacket as a pillow.

Yamori let him do this, seeing as he wouldn't be able to truly torture his opponent if all he did was defend a petty girl.

Now was the battle.

Kaneki swiftly ran up to Yamori, dodging an uppercut and countering by grabbing his fist and twisting it. He used Yamori's hand as a ledge to push himself into the air and attempt to kick him in the face, but was caught by Yamori's other hand and flung another direction. Kaneki was flying upside down as he put his hands up to decelerate his velocity. After doing so, he flipped himself upright.

Yamori, by this time, was already on him and grabbed his head. The blond squeezed his head in an attempt to make the leader of Goat cry out. His plan failed as Kaneki jabbed his fingers into Yamori's arm, causing enough pain for the muscular man to let go of him.

Distracted by the disturbance in his arm, Kaneki was able to climb on top of Yamori and grab him in a chokehold. Although unable to touch the ground due to Yamori's height, the attack was effectively doing its job.

Yamori reached behind him in a desperate attempt and pulled Kaneki off with brute force and bringing him down to crush the boy with his knee.

Kaneki's back smashed into Yamori's knee, and he coughed up blood. He looked towards where his comrades once were to find them gone... good, they were accomplishing the other parts of this mission.

Tsukiyama, Uta, Banjou and the masked trio were inside, secretly, and quietly, rescuing the other captives.

A normal human would have a broken back, but this ghoul got up as if it were nothing. He smiled. "You said you tortured them right? Then let's see what you can handle," the half-ghoul said as his kagune appeared.

* * *

"This way, your friends are probably being kept over here," Banjou said wearing a red robe and leading the group. They had killed a few guards and stolen their hooded-capes and strange masks.

"My... I hope Kaneki-kun is doing well... if he dies, then I will eat that large, disgusting man for hurting my dear Kaneki-kun!" Tsukiyama exclaimed.

"Shh, I'm sure he's doing fine, let's just stick to the plan and find the others," responded the tattooed one.

"Tres bien."

The six were approaching a large door. One more passage way and-

"What are you doing here? What's your group num-"

He was dead before he finished his sentence. Uta cut off his head. Banjou and his goons were momentarily shocked by the turn of events.

"Man we're gonna get spotted soon," said the female gas mask.

"Yeah let's hurry it up," said the smaller male gas mask.

The third one was silent.

"Alright, alright- it's just through here. It'll be hard to escape with a large group but I think with the numbers we'll be alright."

* * *

The Manager, Yomo and Kimi were all helping clean Anteiku when in came a rather odd man. He was tall, had abnormal hair and wore glasses. With him he had a suitcase- a quinque.

By then, the Manager had already sensed they had been found out. After all, a CCG member just went into a coffee shop run by ghouls with the sign saying "Closed." Sure Mado said that the Black Reaper, and indirectly his associates, were to be left alone, but Kureo Mado was not someone a ghoul could trust on any account.

He sat on a stool and looked at the damage around him. "Hidden in plain sight... who would've guessed."

The Manager made two cups of coffee as Yomo and Kimi went into another room.

"The girl is human," the older man said.

Lifelessly, the investigator looked up. "I have no intentions of hurting her or that man, but we received information that a ghoul in this area was the Owl. And considering that the Owl must be of some age now, also with the reports of this shop being owned by ghouls, there was one conclusion we had. But, as there are no reports of death in this area, and yourself being so humble, the Owl was the only ghoul or human present during my investigation."

"You have my thanks," Yoshimura said as he handed the man a cup of coffee.

He took a sip. "It's good. Is it hard not being able to eat human food?"

"I believe ghouls would not be in this war if we could eat human food."

The younger male smiled, "That's likely."

The two drank their coffee and conversed about what would happen next. As soon as they were done, the Manager issued that he had no intent to fight and would go without a fuss.

Without any other word, the investigator gave the ghoul an RC suppressant and cuffed him. Under normal circumstances, he proceeded to take him out where an armored vehicle was waiting. More soldiers were about to enter when the investigator halted their advance.

"We're done here, the Owl is captured. Return to base."

Yomo and Kimi came out as soon as they heard the bells on the door ring. Both white haired men were gone. Yomo could only assume what happened. "Let's go," he said as he picked up the two tea cups that the Manager kept. Then he went into the back to find flammable items and a match.

"What are you-"

"I was told to do this in case something like this happened- it was a promise to him."

After lighting it, Yomo took Kimi out through the back and ran with her. He hated doing that- getting rid of all these precious memories... but now wasn't the end, he could still rely on Kaneki to bring Anteiku home, for it was not the location or the building that made up Anteiku, it was the people that worked there, and the customers, that created and made Anteiku lively.

Kimi turned around and saw, through the door that was partially open, the flames starting to engulf everything. That place her Nishio learned to love- that place she learned to want to be. Gone. She shed a tear.

* * *

"C'mon, this way, we're going through the back!' Banjou yelled to his group of 30. Including the workers of Anteiku, they found many of Banjou's acquaintances, which they all proceeded to join in on the escape. "There shouldn't be as many guards around there. The plans said there would be but I highly doubt it!"

Banjou was correct. The number of guards around the back was small in number. But they were faced with a different enemy, someone who wasn't expected to be there. A very strong opponent.

Ayato Kirishima.

"So this was your doing, Banjou?"

* * *

The investigators watching Yamori and the Black Reaper fight were watching closely, taking notes in their minds so that they could gain a strategic advantage over their opponent whoever that may be.

Gunshots rang out from the back, prompting one of the CCG soldiers to accidentally fire his weapon. Another Aogiri member fired back, and Shinohara ordered the immediate start of the attack. Whether or not the half-ghoul had said this to be a pointless war or not, this was their duty, and accomplish it they must.

"Commence the operation!"

Some of the Aogiri in the windows were using their kagune like shields and firing their guns, while others simply did both with their kagune. The CCG's front line were being picked off, even through their riot shields and armor. Suddenly, a few blocks away, Aogiri members were spotted attacking the rear of the CCG. It was a two-way battle- no one was to interfere with the Black Reaper of the Jason, or they'd probably die a death worse than being simply eaten by a ghoul.

"So this is him- the Black Reaper. Doesn't look to be a very big fighter."

A bandaged girl looked up to a more-mature sounding man, "Maybe, but did you hear what he said, he'd suit us well, dont'cha think?"

* * *

Slash! Slash! Stab, slash, punch!

Chaos around the two; fighting for their lives; fighting for superiority.

Yamori's kagune threw him up to the air, where he then jumped to the top of the building, avoiding stray bullets from the battle that was taking place below. His underlings meant nothing to him, he could already tell that their battle was lost long ago.

He waited to pummel Kaneki as he fell, but found the half-ghoul's kagune coming down on him like a hammer. Yamori avoided and used the humongous kagune he had to attack like a fist. Kaneki's kagune cut it in half as Yamori screamed in pain.

"Bastard!" He attacked again but found himself feeling something sharp in his leg. Another one of Kaneki's attacks.

The Jason's arm regrew and he went to attack Kaneki again but was once again foiled in his plans. Kaneki's four pieces to his kagune formed one huge weapon and stabbed through his chest.

This, however, didn't stop the man as he continued trying to attack.

Kaneki wasn't going to kill him- no, this wasn't a good time for that. Currently, two strong powers were fighting each other, so he decided to show them a spectacle.

The younger boy's ghoul limbs reverted back to their original states. They then slithered to Yamori in a very quick and snake-like manner before piercing through his arms and legs.

"If you move, they all come off," Kaneki threatened intimidatingly. Walking to the ledge, the kagune put the blond man in front of him, holding him in the air.

CCG, Aogiri- they observed it. Fighting continued blocks down, but here they stopped for a minute. Juuzyou looked up at the two ghouls on the roof in glee. His scythe stained in the blood of Aogiri members who were stupid enough to choose him as an opponent. Being as small as he was, he hated being criticized for it, but it came with perks. Seeing the little guy hold this humongous S Rank in the air made him happy, as odd as it sounded. The idea of fighting ghouls was great, but to torture a ghoul was even more appealing to the stitched boy.

"What did you tell me you did? Count down from a thousand by seven? Then let's do that," Kaneki ordered.

Yamori shivered, in anger rather than pain, "You think I'll do that aga-"

His left shoulder was no longer existent for the time being. Yamori screamed and started to count as he was told to.

Aogiri was frightened. Yamori wasn't their strongest, or their creepiest or even the weirdest of their bunch- but at the very least, he was the scariest among them. Even a wrong word with him got you killed, but to see him under the foot of this white haired boy made their determination and confidence wither up and die. They dropped their weapons in horror as Kaneki continuously stabbed Yamori, making sure that he lived to feel more. This was redemption, this was punishment... for hurting the ones he cared about. A savage.

Shinohara found the sight to be disturbing beyond belief, but took this chance to apprehend the Aogiri members. They killed the ones who weren't on their knees and arrested the ones who wished to live and did as they were told. Throughout the complex they surrendered, watching their friends cry in fear. An oddball called Moro killed twenty or so men and escaped, however. Two twin ghouls were killed by Amon and Juuzyou in quick time, despite being S ranked.

The number of arrested ghouls would be a grand number, but that's a victory for humanitarian standards.

Mado and the rest of Squad Goliath then traveled up the stairs to apprehend the Black Reaper and Jason, only to find the latter writhing in pain and fear on the ground, with the other no where to be found.

Touka, who had been laying on the ground before, had walked herself away from the scene through the confusion.

And then she saw him- Ken Kaneki, the one she so desperately wanted to see.

"Ka-Kane-" The girl reached out to him but fell over, and found herself being carried by her beloved Kaneki, the only difference, with pinkish hair from the blood stained on the white.

"Shh, sleep, Touka," he said looking at her hands. They were scarred from the torcher that Yamori gave them. This time, he didn't feel angry, he fealt sad. His eyes watered. "I'm sorry, Touka... forgive me for being so incompetent."

* * *

Banjou's team continued the escape plan as they found themselves wandering through the city, where countless bodies of CCG and Aogiri members lay. Encountering Ayato proved to be helpful, as he aided the escape, saying something about never being able to forgive Yamori for doing something as evil and hideous as that to the sister he loved and cared for.

"Damn it there's no where we can go, ugh, what do we do, what do we do-"

"Calm down Banjou," said a gas mask.

"Does anyone here know where we can hide everyone?" Asked another.

No one replied, except for the French speaker. "You may all stay at my restaurant, so long as Kaneki-kun keeps his promise I shall hide you all. This way, we shall prepare a huge meal!"

"We're going to regret this but we have no other options," said Uta, "lead the way Tsukiyama."

"Tres bien."

* * *

Kaneki watched as Anteiku burned to the ground. He couldn't believe it. Everything he fought for...

"DAMN IT!" He screamed as he fell to his knees.

The glass and the porcelain shattered while the wood of Anteiku itself was engulfed by more fire and smoke.

Banjou's team encountered Kaneki crying on his knees and holding Touka. Anteiku was burning and the sounds of battle were slowly fading.

"Kaneki-kun?" Tsukiyama said.

"Wherever you're going, let's go, there's nothing left for me here."

"But this is like you're-"

"I said there's nothing left here! Now move, this big of a group can be easily spotted... and someone take this girl," he said handing her out.

Ayato took her. The stains of blood on her- even if he maybe would've kicked or beat her, torture, taking off toes and fingers... there was no way he could do that to his sister. His precious sister. He was entrusted with her, and take care of her he will.

"Where are you going, Reaper?" Asked one of the former Aogiri.

The man in question smiled and looked at everyone, "I just need to know something: who am I?"


	21. re

"Today marks the second year of the Centipede group's famous attack on Tokyo. Only days after raiding Aogiri, the CCG suffered heavy losses for a second time, this time due to a new created organization. We take a moment now to remember the victims of that insidious attack. No investigator was killed in the fight, as they bravely defended those who did not have the power to fight. To even attack civilians... how horrendous."

What gave time meaning? Was it the concept that humans gave to it? Or was it the feeling of understanding something more? What gives humans power? Is it their sheer numbers and intellect, or their struggle to survive? Who said that ghouls were creatures that shouldn't exist? Animals that did nothing to society... but they're wrong. How many ghouls have changed history? A myriad. Vlad the Impaler, the supposed fictional Man in the Iron Mask, Napoleon Bonaparte, Minamoto Yoritomo, even the 300 of Greece.

All of these famous people, new and old, have caused both terror and good deed within the world. The present, as well, has many famous figures who are changing the world right in plain sight. But the oppressors of ghouls are ignorant and are blind to such facts.

That's how it is, isn't it? "Ignorance is a bliss." Truthful words to a common thinker.

It was snowing lightly, but it was still cold enough for a jacket. A girl put her hand out and caught a snowflake in her glove. She watched it as it quickly melted on her covered palm. The smell of the city was intoxicating, but it was home. Her legs started to wander in one direction, but her mind was elsewhere as she looked on at the beauty that was her home. A slow, steady stride. A scarf covered her neck and the lower portion of her mouth, showing only her pale green eyes. She walked happily, observing all that was around her in small gazes before she proceeded to look at another thing or person.

She found herself looking at a sign at some point in her journey. "So this is where I'm doing autographs? Looks interesting," she said, opening the door and walking in.

The scent of freshly baked sweets, and recently made sandwiches lingered inside. But most satisfying of all, was the aroma of coffee that smelled at though it was made by a professional. The girl was greeted by a blond man and was escorted to her seat, where she would be signing autographs for her fans within a few minutes.

Nicely set tables with beautiful cloth on them; wood of magnificent texture and brilliant designs. Shiny clean silverware and a cup of warm coffee set for the female.

Her eyes wandered to the counter where two other women and another man were working. Behind them was a cabinet of china, cups and plates. But what stood out the most were two familiar looking tea cups that stood on soft pieces of cloth.

The girl looked back as a woman approached her, handing a book to her for her to sign.

"And who do I make this out to?"

"Nijima Aoi."

The green haired girl signed it, "Nijima Aoi-san... here you go, thanks for buying my book."

"Of course I'd buy a book from you, Takatsuki-sama."

So this was the home of that one, huh? It might've been a different name and a different location, but all these years later, it's still the same. The girl smiled, :re, huh? It's been a while... Ken Kaneki.

:re


	22. Zero Day

**Well, school is 3x harder than it was last year. Yes I did my calculations correct... so um, I'm gonna try and get back into it since I'm... yeah. Well, I'm gonna make some in-between chapters before we hit :re, otherwise I'm going to bomb :re. Like, I can remember hardly any of the characters from :re so, like, be patient or something. Here, this is my gift- be happy, sort of... well this isn't a happy chapter.**

Light- too bright. Many on the ground, screaming orders to run. Most, away, some- dead. One left. Twelve bodies of forty nine on the floor- lifeless.

Stern, without emotion; remorse; joy. Staring coldly into the eyes of others. Quiet and still, observing all. Who and what. The investigators closed in, quinques in hand, mind focused.

"Black Reaper... we have you, surrender," said another white haired man. "Originally, I was content with finding only the Owl, but I received orders to capture you too. Cease your futile attempts to escape."

Black Reaper? So that's who he was- quite a name. Mentality failing. "Surrender? But that would mean... my friends getting captured," he said to himself, staring at his blood-covered hand before closing it shut. "Leaving is worthless, in that case. Fighting seems more appropriate," he then said aloud. Existence... why?

"So be it... I, Kishou Arima, shall proceed to apprehend you," the older white haired one said, unleashing his quinque.

The younger one unleashed his kagune. Headache.

With the wind blowing from the helicopter watching above, the Reaper struck first. Rather than attack Arima, he wounded the other investigator, dodging his real opponent's attacks as best he could, but was wounded each time. The wounds healed quickly, but hurt they did.

Turning with an odd expression, head tilted at an almost 130 degree angle, the Reaper eyed the final investigator. Body aching.

Swiftly, the two attack each other. Arima's blood was drawn near his shoulder, but was merely a minor cut. The other coughed up blood as a stomach wound healed as fast as it could, but it was for naught, for the investigator kicked him down. In an attempt to grab hold of the man's leg, which was perked on his back, the ghoul dislocated his arm to grab him. He grabbed the leg, but noticed he could no longer feel his arm. Looking over, the dismembered limb only sat as blood poured out of the stump that was once his arm.

Rejuvenating his kagune, the ghoul attempted to stab Arima, but that too was cut off. At the very least, it allowed for him to get up. Who was the fight for.

"Strong willed... a pity."

"Shut up!" The ghoul yelled as he attacked without plan. The kagune had been depleted to a single limb, and his walking became ever more drunken-like.

The kagune was split, and then the other arm. More blood, like a waterfall, came out from the boy. He took a few steps back but was followed. There was no hope; no time to grasp the situation and take a breather, for he was stabbed in the middle of his stomach by the investigator. In a desperate attempt, the boy bit down on his enemy's shoulder. Arima, slightly shocked at the maneuver, punched the boy's head away.

One of the other, injured investigators stood up and activated his quinque. A large, spear like object. He screamed as he ran to the boy, piercing his head through the eye socket. The non-human screamed as the investigator pulled his weapon out.

Arima pushed him to the ground, once again ramming his foot into the boy's back. Listening, he heard the radio order the members of the CCG to find and take in the people he had just told to escape.

Vehemently shaking, the boy tried his best to stop the investigators. One of them was stabbed through the back, immediately killed. All of the others turned to face the new opponent.

The boy's eyes widened, "I TOLD YOU TO LEAVE!"

"I understand... but this is a personal mission, Kaneki-kun," said the new ghoul. He fought off the other investigators that were supposed to be in pursuit of the Goat team, injuring them all once more- some that would kill, some that were healable.

The man then turned to Arima. "You will pay dearly," he said in a hellish voice, and attacked without warning.

Arima kicked his first opponent's head, almost knocking him out. Laying there, desperately trying to stay awake, he watched the two fight. It was over quickly, as the ghoul was stabbed through with a fatal injury. White, stained red, watched as his comrade fell to the ground next to him.

Staring into the eyes of his friend- he knew not who he was. Tears formed, as if there was some deeper connection to him and the dying ghoul.

"It's okay... Kaneki-kun... I gave them the loca... tion," the ghoul tried his best to speak but was slowly succumbing to his wounds. "To die next to you... dying honorably... doing... something good... tres bien- it feels... nice."

Arima watched in silence. The boy's jaw quivered. The investigator then, with one hand, picked up the boy, and with the other, took out the RC cell suppressant. Before the boy had time to react, Arima had already stuck the syringe into his remaining eye.

Pushing his glasses up, he then dragged the boy, who's vision was fading and memories of people were evaporating, into a truck where many soldiers with loaded Q guns waited. Within a minute, he had passed out.

Paramedics arrived to help those who were wounded and to comfort those who were dying.

And in the nightmares of the boy sat one question: who am I? Losing the people you love can hurt more than it seems, especially when you understand you may never see any of them again- the feeling that you caused the death of them all lingering everywhere... the fact that you caused the death of many plaguing dreams...

 **Zero Day**


	23. Forget

Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? **Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?! Who?!**

The question, it lingered- in the air, on the furniture, on the faces of people, on his hands- **WHO?! WHO?! WHO?!**

What was this? This confinement of white... this disrespect and disparity. The never ending hell of torture, on and on and on and on and on and on... the tears shed helped none; the cries for help did nothing; the desperate attempts to beg for forgiveness were in vein.

Shivering in fear.

Shaking.

Anxiety.

Chaos.

Insanity.

Had it even been a day? There was no time. Hapless.

"Black Reaper- here he is."

Blindfolded with a black mask; gagged with a ball; tied with his hands and legs tied behind his back, with his face aiming at the ground; the snowy white hair drooping down, making only parts of his face observable.

"Thank you. Shut and lock the door."

"I'm on it, sir."

The sound of a chair moving. Adrenaline spiking in the boy's body. A briefcase put on the floor.

"Black Reaper... or should I say, Ken Kaneki?"

No reaction.

"If you cooperate, maybe I can reduce the harsh treatment on you. The ghouls you were with, tell me about them."

He was demanding.

The other was unmoving.

Ghouls... what were those?

"What about the old man from Anteiku. How did you meet him, can you tell me?"

The boy hung there, crying, for an unexplainable reason. Who was this old man? He could recall no such person- he could recall no such thing as an 'Anteiku.' In fact, he could recall nothing.

"The Rabbit? I hear there was a girl and a man who were there when the Fueguchi family was killed. Two investigators followed them but were quickly outran. That was you, wasn't it? I can't blame you for wanting to keep them safe, that is, but you're in no spot to do so. You can reduce their conditions now, or you can learn about their deaths the hard way. There are no in between options."

He continued to silently weep.

What could he do?

He tried to untangle himself from the chains that held him. It was no use, he had no strength; there was no way to get out of this. Again, he tried, but this time he pulled himself upwards to try and face the person who was interrogating him.

He cried out because of the pain, but a sacrifice must come. With whatever strength he could muster, he did his best to look up.

The man got up and undid his cuffs. Falling to the ground, face first, he shook. Slowly, he moved. Slowly, he got up.

"Show me, what is it that you want?" Asked the oppressor, holding his briefcase firmly.

He was dizzy, almost; perhaps even in a drunken state from the drugs they injected into his eyes, but he continued to stumble as he attempted walking.

Originally, he had no intent but to try and escape from his torture, but a sudden urge- a sort of scent, triggered something within him, an he lunged at the taller person.

"Inferior."

An entire arm was dismembered.

Again, he fell in pain. Again, he asked the same question. Who.

The door opened as three men came in.

"Clean this up, I'll be here tomorrow as well."

"But... sir Arima, you saw how-"

"Do as I say."

"Y-yes sir."

It was black, everything else. Sound, smell, sight, touch, taste- it all felt empty.

* * *

I get 4-6 hours of sleep a day, fuck school.


	24. Fading Regret

What were the words he didn't get to hear enough of? The phrase he longed for- what was it? The memories were already faded. Not a single trace remained within his cold body or his shaking soul.

Hanging lifelessly from the steel chains that binded his hands together. Dried blood stains on rags of cloth and new drops falling down his face and into the puddle they formed below. Everything had been drained; his only will to live was a feeling that lingered inside of him.

It was dark... so dark.

But those drops of blood were entrancing as they splashed on the ground, giving the poor soul a sort of nostalgia as he tried to think. No matter how much he thought, however, he could never find the reason for this delight yet melancholic feeling.

Still, he longed to live, to continue as a person that existed- he was existing now, in the present. Those thoughts were protruding his mental capability, unfortunately.

He began to move his lips and his tongue in an attempt to speak, but all that was coming out was incoherent gibberish and ramblings. The vocal cords were vibrating all they could in an attempt to produce sound that was sensible, with his tongue thrashing about like a fish out of water and his mouth shivering in an expression of pain.

"You should be thankful- I spared a few of your friends."

Someone spoke. It was the same man who had been coming everyday since the oppressed boy's imprisonment. Although the tormentor spoke, it sounded like a language of tongues to the ill-fated stripling. In an attempt to communicate, the teenager tried to speak again, but once again, only unintelligible vocalizations were created.

"Aogiri attacked a few days ago. Many of our investigators were killed, but it was a victory for the CCG. Ken Kaneki, if only you could understand what I was saying, I'm sure you and I would be able to converse over a cup of coffee. I wouldn't ask for reconciliation through a façade, but your actions seem sensible enough to deem you... different from the other ghouls. Investigator Koutarou Amon detailed you as quite an interesting subject during his meetings with you. I'd like to believe that you and I could have changed something in this world, after all you and I are both the same in a way..."

The ghoul investigator stood up and approached the young adult, staring at his shaky face as he mumbled whispers under his breath. He then proceeded out the door, leaving the shell of Ken Kaneki to decay alone.

* * *

She cried. It wasn't the first time, nor was it the last. Her home had been destroyed, her family ripped apart and the person she trusted the most had gone missing- what else could she do? It was he the she relied on to listen to her vehement reactions and expressions to things; even when he was hurt by her he listened and laughed with and at her. All through the depressing days he had been at her side comforting her, but now there was no one to do that for her.

The ones who were able to regroup had tried to consul each other, however nothing could cure their sadness over many of their friend's captures and deaths.

Touka Kirishima wasn't one to show her feelings in public, yet she did every time she thought of him. The girl hated to admit it, but the death of Tsukiyama had also added to her depression. The piece of shit that she hated had died protecting the man he once tried to eat, and it made her sad.

Who was there to guide her other than Yoshimura and Ken, her fatherly figure and the man she hoped to one day have been intertwined with.

Life is shitty. It was the shittiest thing in the world. There was no point in living as shit, with shit, for shit- an ambition ruined, a chaotic mentality... but it was those words that she longed to hear. Not the words "I love you" and not the words to keep her motivated; it was the simple words she wanted to hear. "I'm home."

Not just from her dear Kaneki, but from everyone that had gone away into a place far away, whether that be death or a ghoul prison or hiding. There was no moving on from this, she thought. Unless it was all one big, lucid nightmare, there was no way she could recover from such a hurt state. Her heart felt as though it would burst of dolefulness.

An unfathomable feeling of dread like she had never discerned before. It hurt. It hurt a lot. Physical pain was nothing compared to the hurting in Touka's heart.

* * *

 **Really sorry about the waits and short chapters. Starting March I'm going to discipline myself like before, hopefully. Pray that I do.**


	25. Touka, A Remission

Farther. Farther in the world than anyone had ever seen. Farther than the Moon; farther than the Sun- the beyond which lay in the vast expanse of nothingness.

Where is his soul in that intangible place? It's lost, searching for its home of someone that may or may not exist. The name of whom it belongs to has ceased to exist in physical apparition, but continues its legacy through the minds of others. It's not like much has changed. The doleful, inexplicable feeling of loneliness that remains in the people he left behind.

Ken Kaneki has been erased. Nothing but a memory; even the hospitals with his birth certifications and the such had been hacked and no longer contain any documentation of any sort of person being alive.

But the proof of existence is not what defines something as living, rather, that's only applicable in science. Those in the group that follow the Black Reaper, and those in Anteiku, don't believe in such logic. Impossibly confident that he was alive, their assurance in this is proverbial.

When there is a light to grasp for in the dark, the hand reaches for it, no matter how far away it is. No matter how far, how unrealistically far, that shimmering white is, someone will reach for it so that it pulls them from the shadowy darkness they find themselves ensnared in. But what is left when there is no light to reach for? What can be done when the hand itself no longer exists? What if the hand they reach with is not their own? Maybe they continue hoping forever and ever and ever and ever and ever without realizing that what they want is something they can never get, but even so the heart of a human, ghoul or homo sapiens, and will never be deterred by something as fruitless as "you cannot." Forever, even in that circumstance, isn't perceptible by human beings. What can stop the analogies they create using that word, though- nothing, that's what.

Just as it won't stop him. Although it might be forever -an eternity- that he has to wait, he'll never stop. That feeling of returning to someone he doesn't remember will never leave. There is no regret in his heart; to devote all of his life to someday meeting those people that gave him a longing.

Perhaps its all just a pipe dream, however. He knew that what he wanted could be a dream, or an illusion, or some sort of a psychological strategy his apparently enemy planted on him... whatever it was, Kaneki couldn't be certain, so all he could do was wait. And that's what he is doing: waiting.

* * *

Knock knock, the door says.

Creak, it then whimpers.

Clang, it finally whispers.

"Who is it?" The frail Touka asked as she was looking dejectedly through a window in the corner of a dark, small room.

In popped that eccentric boy that was always by Kaneki's side when he visited the café: Hideyoshi Nagachika.

Her head turned and stared into his eyes, "Hide?"

She had forgotten that Hide, a human, had known of her secret- of Anteiku's secret, the fact that they were all ghouls. Surprised, she entered a fetal position and placed her head in between her knees, trying to escape the gaze from Hide. Touka never got to know him, personally, but Hide was a sort of person that could tell exactly how one felt, and Kaneki had told her about this, so she knew what to expect.

"Hey... are you feeling alright?" He asked. Before she could responded, he continued with a joking remark, "Kaneki was never a guy to make a girl cry, much less talk to any."

Thinking about him normally was painful, but the way Hide talked about him wasn't sympathetic. The blond didn't try to say 'I'm sorry for your loss', nor did he attempt to reminisce about him. Rather, the human would try to make a person feel better, whether it included talking about a painful memory or event didn't matter, to him it was a challenge to bring someone above the water of despair and anguish... sort of. Hide cared about people, always did, it was a part of his personality, it made him who he is. That's what made him such an easy person to release emotions to; a personification of empathy, maybe.

He approached the frail looking girl and sat beside her. She could feel the warmth emanating off of him, the warmth of a friend. Despite the fact that she hardly knew this man, he still helped her like he would his best friend. It was such an inconceivable idea to her: helping someone you didn't know that well just because you were acquainted, just because you could. Within what other corners of the world did these people exist in?

Perhaps the question isn't where, but how? How is it that even in such a cruel and unaccepting world where people are prosecuted on their beliefs and what they're born as- how is it that such people are able to exist? What is their strength? What is their will? The world is dark, but still they hang onto that shining light, even in their final breaths, it's as though they are somehow saving the world. The world is dark and cruel, and yet it is also beautiful. Within this narrow cage of despair, the flowers still bloom as life goes on.

She realized this in her short conversation with him. They spoke about how each other's lives were, mostly. And when he was through, he exited her room with a smile. And when he looked back at her, she watched him back- with a smile.

It was as though she was given an absolution for her pitied behavior from the past. A loving child turned into a sort of punk by the deaths of her parents and disappearance of her brother, and then once again shown kindness by the very thing she once despised, and finally he was taken once again. The world was not against her, she was smart enough to understand something as simple as that, but it really did feel like it. When everything is taken just after getting what it is that you want, someone to love and talk with about every problem, it really does feel as if the Universe has declared a war.

Thinking about such things is useless, however. Throughout the night, Touka continued to think to herself. The Black Order, a newly formed group dedicated to finding its "master," the Black Reaper, had recently been established and was concocting plans to figure out his location. Its main leaders included ghouls who formerly were acquainted with that man, so it was needless to say the second objective of the group was to found a location that could become a safe haven for ghouls and humans alike. No, they weren't selfish... Banjou made sure of it.

Kaneki, at any time, would've denied Touka's request to let her join any dangerous group, but no one was there to stop her anymore. With Yoshimura gone, a chain had finally been broken, at the cost of happiness, however. The only way to regain this happiness, she thought to herself, was to fight for what she believed in, and while she didn't know exactly what it was she believed in, she would accomplish that goal... to see him again... the ones that haven't withered away...

Of course, the girl could always settle down and give her prayers to the Black Order, but she wasn't like that. Everyone knew Touka Kirishima was a hands-on tomgirl who's only feminine qualities were being a biological female...

The time of action was now, and the calling was ringing like a giant bell.

Fate can go fuck itself because the Rabbit is back.


	26. eR:ased

Kaneki sat silently within his cell- the former Kaneki, at least. He had no recollections of himself or who he was. He knew many things; it's not as if he lacked basic intelligence or common sense, but he lacked things like memory, and emotions, and mainly stimulants. Throughout his few weeks of being within the confinements of Cochlea, the young half-ghoul had been tortured without peace. Finally, however, he had been given some peace. Finally, the CCG had realized something crucial to his treatment: his mind was already long gone. Nothing they did would ever help in accomplishing one of their goals with him, that being, receiving any information on ghouls. How did this happen? The immense amount of pain the humans caused him was more than anything Yamori could have hoped to achieve. A centipede in the ear? Constant destruction of his toes and fingers? It was all child's play, now it was the expert's time to play. The professional ghoul examiners opened him up place upon place, and for what reason? Kaneki was like a child that was being bullied without giving any explanation as to why. Simply put, they were giving him pain just because they could, in his mind. All that remained were a few memories, albeit hazy, that caused him to be nostalgic around certain things. Books, coffee, the nice attitude of some inmates- they were all anchors holding the boy down within reality. Without them, it's as though he would drift away and never come back down to the earth.

The days after the raid in the 20th Ward had been hard ones. Skirmishes the first two, full blown attacks the next three. It was a hell for the investigators as they watched colleague by colleague die, and later picked up the remnants of their subordinates laying on the ground; what was left, if any, was given proper burial.

Kureo Mado's death was one of the hardest hits to the CCG for he was one of their best. Koutarou Amon, soon after Mado's death, had deserted with Akira Mado. Akira Mado and Koutarou Amon were never found within those days, and so searches for them were called off since the priorities of the commission were lying elsewhere. Their connection with one another was never found. Akira was Kureo's daughter, yes, but why she met up with Amon; how they met; why they life- nothing was ever found. It was as simple as not wanting to die and leaving to find a place to live where death wasn't as relevant. Of course, something as simple as that couldn't have been the answer as to why they had left, no, the brain within investigators is more convoluted than a simpleton explanation such as that. No one was certain, and no one had any plausible reasons, there were only theories, theories that would be left to collect webs since no one touched them. Them leaving was another considerable loss for the counter-ghoul organization, but it's not like more soldiers for war couldn't be trained. No, no, a war always requires warriors, and a few good ones dying off or leaving wasn't the biggest deal... at least to some.

* * *

During this time a new threat started to emerge. Centipede, a recently made organization, had started to obtain territory within the 20th and 18th Wards, leading to conferences and meetings discussing strategies on how to beat this new foe by the CCG. Most of the Centipede members the CCG had killed, thus far, were weaker members; none with a Rank of A or higher had ever been captured, which led to the disbelief that they were a powerful organization... however, a certain event proved them wrong. A CCG building was infiltrated by a Rank S ghoul who slaughtered the investigators before planting a bomb and eliminating tens of interns and office workers. It was the first domestic terrorist attack that didn't involve an actual battle that had happened after the Black Reaper and Owl's capture (though, the CCG soon figured out there were two Owls).

Many ghouls soon joined the Centipede group. They weren't as big and powerful as Aogiri Tree, but most certainly did they have the brains to overpower them if the Centipedes continued to increase their numbers.

Those poor investigators... those ignoramus fools. Believing yourself to be the greater group is sanctimonious, cocky, and arrogant. Never would it achieve something. Both the ghoul and human groups lacked the ability to see past this, with the exception of a few who had no power within either society. Mother Nature is cruel like that- she will give the powerful the opportunities to succeed and the weak a hope that can only be dreamt of. The powerful would change the world, and the weak would be the driving force. Powerful individuals manipulate, but they are nothing without a people to back them.

* * *

As the days went on, Kaneki's heart faded more and more. His sweet yet monotone expression soon turned into paranoia and anxiety. Confined to himself for most days; beaten, whipped, painfully tortured; a blindfold preventing his sight, chains preventing his movement. The RC injections were the most painful, after all, there was only one place they could go. The wardens at Choclea didn't make this any easier: sometimes they'd stick multiple at a time. As loud as he screams were, the damned sadists only replied in pleasured satisfaction. A rat with regenerative abilities as powerful as he, who'd pass up the offer? Who'd miss this boy, anyways? Who'd care if a schizophrenic, broken down microbe of a person was destroyed? Person... ghouls weren't person, 'least not in their eyes. But nothing was right unless it fell under their eyes.

Be forgiven not, be damned to hell- thy shalt suffer.

* * *

The rabbit's nose was not one made for tracking, yet it does so contradictory to its purpose. Continue it shall until its life purpose is achieved. That is her will, she purposed- find he, the one who dare beguile her in his charming and enchanting trance.

Soon...

or perhaps maybe never...

no...

someday...

her words, her poetry, will form a path for him...

Odysseus will travel the journey...

all to see his beloved once more.


End file.
